NL-leading 10 HR. FLY DA BANNER

through one week my review of the pirates is: "it's good when they score eight runs and hit a lot of dingers, do that more often."

concerning that i have to consider that we might at some point have to hand it to ben cherington for his recent first round picks

that was an absurd four-seamer from skenes to get de la cruz

more homers against lefties in the last 18 hours than all of last year

scoring as many runs as the pens did goals the night before will be a sound strategy tomorrow, too

basically on a nightly basis at this point i vacillate between "oneil cruz is slightly better wladimir balentien" and "oh yeah oneil cruz is gonna figure it out"

i'm a little late here but FWIW that suarez check swing is absolutely not a swing on the replay review in the minors if you read the rule about where the swing line is

B U B B A

absurd 94 mph changeups from bubba tonight

i am no defender of cruz's outfield ability at this point but it's hard to see how that's not reynolds' fault

"bubba chandler is the second most talented pitcher in the pirate rotation and he's not close to first" is a wild statement of affairs

This is one of those things where if you don’t know anything about Bob Dylan you go “yeah fine whatever”, and if you know a little about Bob Dylan you go “how could Bob Dylan do this?” and if you know a lot about Bob Dylan you go “yeah fine whatever”

how long will it take the pirates to score eight runs

"the timing is not there yet" for bryan reynolds. did you watch bryan reynolds last year? the timing has deserted him.

you could just NOT invite brian giles to throw out the first pitch, no one would even notice. just have kendall do it alone. or jack wilson. or john wehner. who cares?

people do not seem to know this about brian giles, so: www.sportsbusinessjournal.com/Daily/Issues...

greg brown has discovered "6-7" if you were wondering if it was over yet

the team that has very recently employed marcell ozuna, ji-hwan bae, domingo german, and aroldis chapman, and has mike clevinger in the minors is inviting brian giles to throw out the first pitch on opening day? you don't say.

i think we gotta think about using "making a duke" as the college basketball version of "clemsoning" given the way they keep melting down in the tournament over the last five years

lol I feel better about UNC blowing a 19 point lead now

lol

I gave up complaining about batting order a long time ago but how do you hit Triolo in front of Horwitz

a very interesting dynamic to track is that when people talk about the pirates, they talk about how the whole team will be floated by pitching and if they can hit they might make a push, but that isn't really what the projection systems say.

yes, yes i do

I also love baseball

unreal work, big assist from Defensive Specialist Henry Davis

that's an ABSURD play by barco

i know the bullpen is thinned out for the second game of the season, but what a shitty spot to stick a young starter who's on the team to do swing relief work with

isn't there a new rule about BS pitchcom issues?

it will take four singles to score bryan reynolds from second at this point in his career

ryan o'hearn executes the hardest play that exists in baseball*, throwing the ball to second base as a first baseman *i have no choice but to assume, having Seen Some Shit

the First Hundred Million Dollar Man in pirate history

baseball teams scoring 18 runs one day and then a straight up pitcher's duel the next is one of baseball's underrated little pleasures

few things about oneil cruz:

betteridge’s law

not allowing broadcasters to see the k-zone is one of the most positive changes that could possibly be made to MLB broadcasts

season is canceled

it doesn't bother me when baseball games are on streaming services that require subscriptions, but it DOES bother me when things are on NBC and i can't stream them without peacock, even though i have cable. that's EXTREMELY scummy.

someone should ask pennsylvania teachers what they think about the governor mandating they find a way to fit teaching cursive into their classroom, just saying.

“I was expecting an attack on climate science,” Dr. Marvel said. “What I was completely unprepared for was an attack on [all] science, because it is a means of finding out and telling the truth.”

pirate prediction: 84 wins, third wild card. the thing that keeps them from being better is actually the pitching, as mlodzinski, cleveinger, and urquidy get a frustrating number of starts due to managing young arms and injuries with the depth slightly thin due to the (necessary) off-season trades.

in honor of opening day being tomorrow, i have two thoughts i want to share: 1. the pittsburgh pirates will win the 2026 world series 2. don't panic that was just the stadium flyover

everyone who broadcasts baseball looked at baseball fans online complaining about baseball and were like, "even the fans fucking hate baseball, we gotta do something to fix this," in the exact way that everyone always misreads people online complaining a lot about the thing they actually like

excited that the pirates might win 84 games this year because that means i will only get eye-bulgingly mad at baseball games 78 times instead of 90

just noticed the pirates are actually the (very slight) favorites for the last NL wild card at FanGraphs, www.fangraphs.com/standings/pl...

i mean, my eyes don't really work well enough anymore to do anything of important on a phone. you've all seen the grammar and punctuation i type into this box sometimes.

JM: We could still grab some ice cream. (Fans this season can collect all three Pirates logo helmet cups.) MC: I’d probably try to collect all three in one sitting. JM: What do you mean try? MC: As I’m aging, I’m developing a bit of a dairy intolerance. That can be risky while I’m not at home.

‪i learned that mason jackey works for pirates dot com now when my friend sent me an "article" where he literally just names foods at the ballpark and matt capps goes, "oh yeah." yeesh.