What a cheeky monkey!

Genuinely impressive to convert to a religion as an adult and then be SO BAD at expressing and keeping to the tenets of that religion as to make a full-on enemy of that religion’s leader.

I feel bad about it because it is his full-time paid job to be an asshole on social media but I do it for free.

Pam Bondi: ‘What Is The DOJ Hiding?’ https://theonion.com/pam-bondi-what-is-the-doj-hiding/

Geez what a weak speech. Nothing has changed. More people are going to die. Hormuz is not open. Iran still has all of its nuclear material. And gas is pushing five bucks a gallon.

Offerman is a prophet who comes before the Lord to do some preliminary sanding and rough cuts.

It’s Sunday night, so it’s once again stock market manipulation time for Trump. How much will his family profit off his unwanted war this time?

"One little riot." Sounds like a children's book for really stupid children.

With Kimberly in town, I think Don Jr wants to take that tunnel out of the building.

Democrats flip Florida state House district that includes Trump’s Mar-a-Lago 🤣🤣🤣

When you're a star, they let you do it. You can do anything...

There should be an additional style of Heathcliff comic where an additional edge of frame observer makes a comment about the comment made by the main edge of frame observer.

Political Profile: Markwayne Mullin https://theonion.com/political-profile-markwayne-mullin/

You lose 10% of your support, you lose the house, you lose the senate, you lose the presidency.

J. D. gets one right.

As soon as Trump says he wants to do it, MAGA will support US boots on the ground in Iran by 85%. It is a cult.

Justice for Cricket!

Kristi gets Cricketed Trump Administration Live Updates: President Ousts Noem as Homeland Security Secretary www.nytimes.com/live/2026/03...

While we all watch Iran…

They don't need to jump around like trained monkeys to prove their patriotism.

He admitted to being present with Epstein and underaged girls. He needs to explain the details of this meeting, who else was present, and why he didn't report it at the time.

Is it too early to call the Democrats’ 2028 nominee an uninspiring candidate?

Why are the MAGAts claiming that the team USA Olympic hockey victory is somehow about them?

I find no justification for the existence of this whatsoever. companion.ai/einstein

"We only visited Epstein's Island because we needed some sulfuric acid." -- the aliens

Maybe we still have a constitution. apnews.com/article/supr...

Josh Johnson explains the mathematical mystery of the Rubik's Cube while solving it.

How does it hold up to the first version on the big screen?

"Hillary Clinton is competent."

Trump wants Penn Station to be renamed Trump Station which is a good name for it because it is really awful in there.

“First we need to push back on the lies; then crush the pedo/trafficking narrative; then rebuild your image as philanthropist.” www.nytimes.com/2026/02/16/u...

I would buy this.

Fuck ICE! (Come at me bros.) www.nytimes.com/2026/02/13/t...

He is the speech police.

The MAGA new right “seems to be betting that the American polity has a deep reserve of untapped nativist rage”—but may also be “underestimating the everyday decency and patriotism of the American public,” Laura K. Field argues:

And note that Trump himself has yet to discuss the phone call or make any claims about it. He knows exactly the questions that it raises. He wants nothing to do with having to explain why he didn't testify then or why he shouldn't have to testify now.

Trump should have been asked to specify the time and the place of the event. He should have been asked what other adults were present, whether Maxwell was present, whether other men were present. And he should have been shown photographs of victims for identification. This should happen now.

"The move comes a year and a half after Trump on the campaign trail reportedly requested $1bn from oil bosses, promising he would scrap environmental rules if elected." www.theguardian.com/us-news/2026...

TACO Trump allows Democratic governors at White House meeting after initial snub www.washingtonpost.com/politics/202...

He admitted to being present with Epstein in the company of underage girls. When and where did this event occur? What other adults were present? Was Maxwell present? Were there other men? Was he asked to identify or did he offer to identify any of the victims? Trump has a lot of explaining to do.

BREAKING: Pam Bondi fails to indict a ham sandwich.

I.e., It is on the table.

👇👇

"Karoline Leavitt, the White House press secretary, said she could not confirm the call had taken place ..." www.nytimes.com/2026/02/10/u...