-it's got a... -quiet intensity? -well, no, a... -well then, a certain noisy relaxed quality maybe? -no, what I meant was... -how about a quietly noisy relaxed intensity?

the current leaders in the republican gubernatorial primaries in iowa and south dakota are "a farmer" and "a businessman" respectively

bari weiss deserves nothing better than a hostile work environment

Oi Chewie, just got off the phone wif Ol Man Didney. Eez lookin at the box office numbahs and we sayin the next movie's gonna aff ta be about you n me wandrin a bunch of empty allways on Corcuscant

The Brakrooms "Yeah, buddy!"

personality test for maga voters to determine relative proportions of racism, stupidity, end evil

we need a batman who just shoots the tires out of cars whose drivers run red lights and turn right on red when it says not to

i absolutely hate a certain local cartoon artist's work and am tired of seeing those stupid slow down signs all over town

what fucking losers us law enforcement has become; playing candy crush on the subway, kidnapping brown people, and creating lists of people who don't like skynet instead of going after actual criminals

Pope Leo addresses the Synod Hall after presentation of his first encyclical Magnifica Humanitas: “Artificial intelligence needs to be disarmed. The word is strong, I know, but deliberately chosen."

shout out to the gen-x gay at cats: the jellicle ball who wore a papi jockstrap to the show (as well as tight looking e cut jeans which is how i know he was wearing a papi jockstrap)

you know rum tum tugger is a himbo because he is easily impressed by basic magic tricks

there's these big japanese style fans you can get at cats: the jellicle ball but when you whip them open real fast it sounds like someone ripping a big one 💨

"this is us" the tourist mother proudly informs her family as the 42nd Street shuttle pulls into times square

it would be faster just to list the trains you *can't* transfer to at times square

was more relieved than disappointed that they did not actually transport the large glass (my favorite piece of art and my tattoos) from philadelphia for the duchamp retrospective at moma; made up for by including a good number of his preparatory sketches and paintings 1/2

the euphoria of leaving an amazing show knowing you get to do it all over again tomorrow

shout out to the guy riding his bike past bryant park while masterfully playing wonderwall on a slide whistle

first visit to new york in the window where i can say i was living here twenty years ago

flight attendant continues to try to get people to hurry up and take their seats by passive-aggressively saying how long we have left for an on time departure and i am here for it

this two-part, 4+ hour argentine film is by far the funniest thing to be able to watch on a delta flight

absolute garbage @gluesenkampperez.house.gov you should be ashamed of yourself

oregon is first *and* we didn't commute the sentence of a convicted election tamperer, so suck it, @colorado.gov

so much for shopping at @barnesandnoble.com

i fucking hate cristiano ronaldo i don't hate messi; i'm just tired of hearing about him

well if this thing that totally will not happen because republicans are racist pieces of shit desperately trying to hold onto power happens, we have nothing to worry about do you fucking hear yourselves? how fucking stupid you sound right now?

a more embarrassing place you'll never fuck than on the hood of a cybertruck

sad i won't be alive when @theonion.com published our dumber century in 75 years

i remember seeing this replayed in a split screen with that night's kentucky derby, where the winning horse completed the race faster than colon ran the bases

Me: I voted for Donald Trump because I had him confused with that other guy. Donald Duck. NYT reporter: Are you sure you want me to print that next to your real name and a drawing of you? Me: Yes.

impeach or resign, @hakeem-jeffries.bsky.social

the most revelatory part of the experience of watching fight club for the first time in 20+ years for me was realising i had misremembered some of project mayhem's targets as self-storage facilities

sports: because men need something to be mad about on the weekend

my response to every story about the war re: the current administration

rename it charles entertainment cheese boulevard

so excited that i can catch a couple of these while in town for belle & sebastian

in the pilot for macgyver he lives in griffith observatory like that was going to work long-term

not @theterminizer.bsky.social and i laughing every time they say chancalay

Yes, rent is expensive and healthcare is expensive and the metrics don't measure the way people actually experience the economy but fundamentally, the entire economy is fake, designed to funnel money to the same five people who live in bombproof bunkers and own the people who supposedly represent us

presented without comment

Man Who Threw Molotov Cocktail At Sam Altman’s Home Claims He Was Following ChatGPT Recipe For Risotto https://theonion.com/man-who-threw-molotov-cocktail-at-sam-altmans-home-claims-he-was-following-chatgpt-recipe-for-risotto/

Trump send JD on a political suicide mission while he and Marco watched a UFC fight and now he's 100% going to blame this on JD. It's all so stupid and funny.

willing to vote for candidates who: -promise to prosecute the current administration for its crimes and abuse -support the lqbtq+ community -curb the excesses of capitalism (at minimum) -demand paper towel and toilet paper dispensers in public restrooms that fucking work

if that idiot were president during the cuban missile crisis it would have ended like a macgruber sketch

resign @schumer.senate.gov & @hakeem-jeffries.bsky.social you continually fail to meet the moment