@tcparker.bsky.social just finished The Long Con. Amazing.

Merino Ballon d'Or incoming

Merino is inevitable

Going back to writing what I’ve watched on a piece of paper

This is the stuff of nightmares

Forget the lack of AC and trains melting. The worst thing about this UK heatwave is the 800 daily conversions about the weather.

I stand with Count Binface

Merino masterclass incoming

Today I feel corrupt

Thanks for everything Leo. Always delivered. Never smiled.

Peter Kay is 53. This might cheer you up if you’re feeling down. Always works for me. youtu.be/U0optP8HoWo?...

Ok Netflix hear me out. I’ve got an idea. www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...

We actually need a “Not interested, this is AI” button or a proper AI blocker. The algorithm needs to learn how badly most people don’t want AI slop.

No I don’t think so

Landlords should have a rating like Uber drivers

You’d thought he would have finished it by now

Normalise calling it the ‘men’s world cup’

"The Treatment of Iran’s World Cup Team Exposed the West's and FIFA's Double Standards" Iran’s football captain was asked about LGBT rights. So, why then wasn’t the U.S. team captain asked about the U.S. bombing of the girls' school in Minab, asks Fatima Bhutto for Zeteo?

We are being had…

This England defence looks so shaky because I’ve been spoiled by watching Arsenal all season.

Of course he also plays the guitar. Get out of here with your perfect hair and perfectness perfect.

Xhaka going to Chelsea hurts my soul.

Me: I wish I would stop see all these amazing looking food posts! Also me: Liking my 784th food posts

This made me laugh out loud 😭

Bit hot innit

Five Arsenal players on the pitch for England. You love to see it.

Terrible quality but this is the clearest video I can find of Djed Spence refusing to shake Partey’s hand 🫡

About to get on the London Underground. Pray for me.

I want to move to NYC for the pizza and socialism

In the end, there were just a lot more human rights abuses than I was expecting from the human rights lawyer.

So Starmer cried over losing his job but not for enabling a genocide. Cool.

Fucking hell 😂

So happy for Xhaka

Squirtle is the best Pokemon

Hospital confessions: Few years ago I broke my finger. To this day I tell everyone I did it playing rugby. The truth is I did it trying to high five a badger while pissed.

Mandelson was best man at his wedding. Just so you know the kind of person he is.

Currently listening to a group of men passionately debate the question: “How many holes do women have below the belly button?” Answers so far range from 2 to 5.

I have very little interest in the World Cup but I need Scotland to stay in it as long as possible because their fans are incredible.

This is the World Cup content I'm here for.

We should all be deeply ashamed that we have one trillionaire while so many millions live in poverty.

I did a double take when I saw his surname

hey quick question, am I having a stroke

Google: “how much prison time can a person expect for keying a robotaxi?” Ok now I’m ready

I think every politician who proposes to ban anything on the internet for teens should be required to propose, as an alternate, a free and accessible and all weather space for teens to hang out in their own hometown

beautiful. still makes me well up when i see photos from the title parade 🥲

This icon will never get the credit he deserves

Life comes at you fast

Iconic level of pettiness

My club. My capital. Home. www.theguardian.com/football/202...

That was bloody wild!