At this point, it’s only the sea lion core compilations on TikTok that are keeping me sane

I guess it's fitting that it's a reimagined, worse version of someone else's artwork

Tired: guitar guy at the party Wired: tarot girl at the party

You are your environment, that includes the people who directly support that environment. If you have to distance yourself from a place and people who have dismissed harmful experiences you’ve had, then that’s okay. It hurts but ultimately it’s the best choice for you.

Casual reminder: Dont give your time and energy to people and places that exploit and use you and then call you ungrateful or “too sensitive” when you stand up to them

The participation of big name funnymen, including Dave Chappelle, Aziz Ansari and Kevin Hart, provoked criticism from fellow comedians and human rights groups.

I normally need medical assistance to sleep but lately even my meds and supplements are not working. Tips?

Am I in my villain era or am I just sick of being gaslit and treated like an idiot in areas where I absolutely have done the work for the last 15 years?

If they made The Shining now, Jack would hack through the door and say “nothing beats a Jet2 holiday.” Makes you think.

I didn’t think today was gonna be the day but it’s nice we were able to hope.

No new pictures, where are you mentally?

I will also take chip bags full of cash and/or chips

Oh I love that feeling when I think I’m doing good then I make a stupid mistake that means I completely wasted my time tonight

The Guilded Age is such a good show now that events are occurring on it.

I’m on the Twitter comedian to Threads/Bluesky comedian pipeline. These are truly dark times.

If AI is coming to take my job can it please hurry up?

Earnest thought: If they ARE together, I am really happy for Pam and Liam and I really hope they find happiness and maybe adopt me. 🥺

I’m not sorry to say but that freaky dude from the #Superman movie looks like the Greendale Human Being

Ok but the real hero in that Superman movie was journalism

Congress eliminated public media funding. At a time of deep division, public media brings us together. Help keep it strong. Join our monthly donors today: n.pr/458sOhq

We officially take back all those things we’ve said about Coldplay over the years. 💛💛💛

I think we as a society have gotten enough perspective to admit that we all found Downton Abbey a little bit boring.

Hey! I’m doing at show at Caveat on June 14! What else would you do with a Saturday night??? www.caveat.nyc/events/colle...

I’m sorry, you couldn’t pay me to care about Manhattanhenge anymore.

As a travel journalist my hot take is that you should be able to check in to your hotel before 3pm

I have also struggled with coming up with a good nickname for myself so I get it, HBO Max.

🎶 IIIII’M GONNA KEEP ON DANCING AT THE 🎶

Need advice from the #migraine and #chronicillness queens with #vertigo: how long/how many tries does it take for the Epley Maneuver to work for you?

The US economy is set to lose billions of dollars in revenue in 2025 from a pullback in foreign tourism and boycotts of American products.

I need the internet to STOP calling incredibly beautiful women ugly. WTH.

The audacity of someone parking a cyber truck in front of my home during Aries season.

Should I press send?

Happy(?) White Lotus Day to all who celebrate

We heard y’all like something called White Lotus?

Me in the national security team group chat

Roses are red Violets are blue

Hitler ended democracy in Germany in 53 days. Today is the 53rd day of the Trump presidency, and the White House has announced that it does not believe a federal district court judge can issue an injunction against the White House. It can. The Constitution says so. This is a constitutional crisis.

This should terrify every person in this country. The use of machine learning systems to approximate an individuals views on war and then, if they are here lawfully on a visa, tag them for deportation is about as sci-fi dystopian as it gets. www.axios.com/2025/03/06/s...

I got laid off today, with the rest of 18F. 18F was an elite federal software shop. We made gov't websites work better, more efficiently for the American people. We saved taxpayers from getting screwed over by contractors. And were fired for it. We made this website to tell our story: 18f.org

My club? Culture.

I don’t know you guys, air travel is STILL the safest way to travel but the current amount of near misses alone is kind of alarming

how your email finds me

Someone just told me that seeing too many em dashes means the piece was written by AI and I keep thinking about how one time an editor told me I relied on em dashes too much so now I'm not sure if I'm real anymore

Trump isn’t going to end the war in Ukraine. He’s going to make it easier for Russia to keep what it stole and greenlight Putin to go after other countries.

I am not making this up: Republicans have introduced legislation… to increase your bank fees.

We have three performances left before the semifinals! Come out and VOTE! Lmk if you’re in!