"You have to admit that it's a bit suspicious that insurgencies keep springing up everywhere we're trying to occupy" - Guy who claims Art of War as his favorite book.

I do think it’s possible they broke tiktok unintentionally. I know they’re evil but they’re also incompetent.

One thing about me is I will immediately join any new social media app.

I am just gonna say it, these guys are completely emasculated by the knowledge that they have been out-organized by a group that is significantly made up of women, and all the bullshit call of duty nonsense is cope for their wounded egos bsky.app/profile/jeet...

“Who could have imagined 10 years ago that things could get this bad.” Well, his current vice president for one.

There is a conversation to be had on the left about the best way to treat people who are ex-maga. But if you are ex-maga you don’t get to be a part of that conversation, much less demand a particular outcome of it.

I just can’t imagine wanting a cookie for realizing I did the wrong thing.

Do you ever think about how there are complete strangers out there who know everything about you, because you work with their ex’s new girlfriend’s friend from home or something?

Sometimes it just feels good to call a hypocrite a hypocrite!

Why is it so hard for people to understand that 2 people who don’t like each other can both be evil and/or annoying?

I was wondering why American evangelicals no longer care about the constitution when they used to treat it like a second bible, but then I remembered they don’t really care what the bible actually says either.

Asking him for his big three to make sure he has an electronic copy of his birth certificate.

It’s so much more embarrassing to pretend you were saying a joke wasn’t funny when you obviously didn’t understand it was a joke then to just admit the truth.

“Before everybody believed more or less what I believed and then social media happened and everyone had all these widely different opinions on every single topic.”

“You thought Hillary Clinton was going to win. You thought Hillary Clinton was going to win. You thought Hillary Clinton was going to win. You thought Hillary Clinton was going to win.” She mutters to herself as her thumb hovers over the download button next to the kalshi app.

Well if it isn't the cops getting kettled right back.

My mom had her towel stolen at the swimming pool.

I would actually love it if men started reading more shitty genre fiction.

There was a period of time there where anxiety of aging overpassed anxiety of gaining weight as the predominant concern of young women. But now that heroin chic is coming back there might be a cohort of women who think 27 is decrepit and 130 pounds is fat.

When you have 1,052 followers.

Did you know that it’s easier to workout in the morning because if you leave it until the evening you might be too tired or something might come up? How come nobody talks about this!?!!?!?

From now on the only preposition you can use for deadlines is “before.”

The thing that really stood out to me from the Access Hollywood tapes is how pathetically Trump was groveling for approval of another man. It’s obviously not the worst revelation from the tape, but I already knew he was a sexual predator, I didn’t know he was desperate to impress Billy Bush.

I’m so grateful expended political capital during an election year to ensure that technofascists could control more of the American media landscape. 💕💕💕💕💕💕

A second way we might "turn down the chaos" in Minneapolis is by asking ICE agents to not shoot people in the face.

I’m not that familiar with Drew. Did he do this knowing it was so dumb that people would have to comment or is he really this stupid?

BREAKING: San Francisco Giants star Jung Hoo Lee has been detained by CBP at LAX. Pelosi's office says she is working to secure his release. www.sfchronicle.com/sports/giant...

I’m halfway through a big closet clean up and I’m over it. Will I get a second wind or will I sleep in a bed surrounded by piles of clothes that don’t fit. Watch this space.

If you ever get imposter syndrome, just remember multiple people got paid AT LEAST six figures to tell Tim Walz to stop calling MAGA weird.

I’m mostly surprised how many people know all the Beckham kids’ names.

“Your clothes ‘just fit better’ after losing weight because you were wearing the wrong size before” she screams at no one as she throws another pair of jeans onto the donation pile that is her floor.

Heated Rivalry is important representation for people with a lot of moles.

One time I mentioned Richard Spencer at a party and people were like “who?” And I was like “the Nazi that got punched” and they were like “ooooooh”

it really is just this stupid

Not downloading Kalshi.

Does anybody have the video of the son from a necessary conversation voting for Trump as a gift to his dad?

Anybody who had any power in the federal government who didn’t at least try to abolish ICE bears some responsibility for this.

How do they keep finding ways to make skylight worse?

#billclinton #monicalewinski #jayleno #the90s

I think all the other social media oligarchs love Elon Musk because he lowers the bar for them. He stopped fixing Twitter search so Threads never had to have a functioning search.

Finally prepared myself enough to look up what Matt Yglesias thinks about all this and it’s more delusionally stupid thanthan I could have imagined.

My laundry card accepts 5, 10, or 20 dollar bills. The machines cost either $3, $3.50, or $4. I have somehow managed to end up with 20 cents on it.

“Who’s that woman takes roles from you? Kristen Wiig.” — my mom.

Trump is unpopular and they can’t find anyone likable enough to replace him.

I HEREBY DECLARE THAT I DO NOT GIVE CENTRISTS PERMISSION TO CREATE IMAGES OF ME HANGING OUT WITH FASCISTS IN THE AFTERLIFE!

There was a period of time in 2008 when it was increasingly obvious we were in a financial crisis but all the people in power kept insisting everything was fine until one day they were like “actually it is a financial crisis and we need billions of dollars by TONIGHT.”

My husband was on the 2 train and a guy started braying about how Renee Good deserved to die and her "lesbian lover" did too. My husband got pissed and said, "You're absolutely disgusting." "Fuck you!" the guy said. "Fuck YOU!" my husband said. The guy left. See? We just need to talk to each other.

i think i’m fully in on “the white house is run by thirtysomething chuds who think grand strategy games are real life”

The trans athlete “debate” has really exposed how many people think the only point of high school sports is winning.