One of the only male teachers I ever had was a conspiracy freak who thought vaccines caused autism, and that the nazis found a source of magic power but were too late to use it to win the war.

I think about her every damn day...

Poltergeist 2 might be the only horror movie that has permanently changed my daily habits. I can't ever drink something without inspecting the glass first, otherwise the tequila worm monster might get me.

I feel like people are starting to forget that landline phones still exist. The number of complaints I've gotten from people at work about not responding to texts sent to our landlines is crazy.

We went to the beach this morning, and the whole shore was covered in fruits?? Like apples, oranges, and a watermelon? It was a lot of fruit really far apart all across the beach. What was up with that

Maybe it was a mistake to drink 16 fluid ounces of prune juice before getting on a plane.

A guy at work saw me playing the anime horse girl game on my phone and only said "ahh, that." In the most disaffected voice I've ever heard.

Saw this beautiful tribute to Divine on my trip to Baltimore.

Crab

im dead now

Might fuck around and become a gnostic. See if blaming all my problems on the demiurge helps me feel better about life.

Desmond woke me up at 4am to tell me that David Byrne is performing in my hometown several months from now.

Someone at work offered to get us Starbucks, which was very sweet of them, but I have no idea what on earth they just gave me. This is not iced matcha. It's thick, creamy, and tastes like pure stomach acid. I have no idea what this is and I'm scared it might kill me.

WORK IS INSANE IM CHASING A PEACOCK

Had a fun little discovery while cleaning today. I found my old cat bus wallet that I used until it was pulverized and falling apart. 15 years after getting it, I can actually read the japanese text inside.

I decided I have to become one of those people who have an annoyingly fun office space with little toys and stickers everywhere.

I wanted to make a cake, but we ran out of eggs and substitute ingredients. I heard about making a cake with soda, but I only had energy drinks. Now I have a very sticky orange monster cake that gives you heart palpitations when you eat it.

When I were a lad this was our meme and we were grateful for it.

I won employee of the year at work! They gave me a little crystal plaque for my desk and a cool pin for my uniform.

Desmond and I finally got to use the taiyaki pan he gave me, and I love these crispy little fish so much. Anko has to be one of my absolute favorite dessert foods.

Bought another gallon of soup for dinner the next day.

All of my friends are making fun of me because I bought a half gallon bucket of soup for dinner.

I'm setting up the monthly announcement sign for the HOA. I sent an email asking to reword it, but he said it has to be exactly as written because they voted on it. Honestly, probably the least least ominous thing an HOA could say.

This is the best luck we've ever had. $90 worth of high quality chocolate came in the box along with our soup ladle.

I caught some kind of hell disease at work, so I'm stuck in quarantine for a few days. I'm going to read all of Beastars now.

Cute creatures!!!

Some old guy at work is ranting about how Gwen Stefani is corrupting kids. Dude, what year is this???

I got a new neopet! I love so many of the anniversary neopets and had a hard time choosing one, but I love his little smile so much.

We had a beautiful Thanksgiving spread, and Desmond cooked another perfect turkey!

Learning a new language at 30 has been really interesting because it's made me realize how much I take for granted with my own native language. It's really given me a new perspective on how complex languages are and how much effort has to be put in to communicate feelings.

I love it here so far because I can just see art and updates on people's lives. It's so nice that I don't need a mile-long block list just to use a website.