Ronaldo's bottom lip to start wobbling in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1...

Nigel Farage being doorstepped by Roger Cook after running a scam which involved selling non-existent static caravans to OAPs in the Poole area.

Spain sometimes play like they think scoring a goal would be somehow crass and common and beneath them.

Ronaldo got a touch! Well done mate! #PORSPA

🚨 BREAKING: UEFA has released a statement expressing disbelief at FIFA's decision to suspend Folarin Balogun's red card ban in the Round of 16, saying that it "crossed a red line." #FIFAWorldCup As always the USA ruins everything and anything it touches. 😡

Struck by how similar the defences of the Balogun ban-lifting are to those offered by Trump's defenders. Even by self-styled American progressives. "Everything's corrupt so more, worse corruption isn't so bad and anyway, other people did corruption before us".

Incredible

What an absolute disgrace to the integrity of football Pochettino is. How to completely destroy your reputation in 24 hours... www.theguardian.com/football/202...

It is lovely out and about in Hackney today. Almost everyone has a sort of happy, tired smile on their face! Everything has been so bleak for so long so when something raises the mood, it should be celebrated. www.youtube.com/watch?v=eUbx...

Have tried to distill the second half into one image

I’m in absolute bits I’m so sorry if you went to bed and didn’t see this live

Seems ridiculous to pick anyone out. But Bellingham was everything we ever hoped he might be tonight. Colossal.

Right

That's a fucking incredible performance. FUCKING HELL.

Assuming this game actually does kick off at 2am (which I guess it might not), if it goes to extra time and pens, it won't finish much before 5am!

Oh for actual fuck's sake. I can't listen to these chumps fill two hours!

Very much a measure of the man, I think.

By the time of the next World Cup, it'll be 28 years since Brazil last won it. That's only two years away from being able to do a self-deprecating samba jam about how 30 years of hurt never stopped them dreaming.

Love that there's a Norwegian player called Ryerson.

Yep. Poch must know what bullshit this is. Let's see what kind of person he really is.

Statement from Belgian FA.

I think we all need to be clear about this. Whether or not the Balogun red card was harsh is completely irrelevant. Either the refereeing team's decision is final or it isn't. Clearly it now isn't, so we have a problem.

Fuck Trump, fuck Infantino and fuck the USMNT. I hope Belgium absolutely destroy them.

Wow. Absolutely disgraceful.

IMPORTANT: The Women’s T20 World Cup final is free to air (whatever that means) on Sky Mix. Game starts at 3:30. #WT20WC 🏏🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🇦🇺

It's always been the case but it's surely clarifying now, in ways that are unignorable to voters. If you support Farage, you're either horrible or stupid. No other possibilities exist.

Make Symbolism Symbolic Again.

Just saying...

Oh god, there's another game starting in half an hour. I couldn't, could I??

Argentina look absolutely fucked. Which tells its own story.

I loved every deranged second of that. Cheers Cape Verde, you brilliant lunatics.

YOU ARE FUCKING KIDDING ME

Ah nuts.

This isn't a fluke. Cape Verde are brave and organised and ferociously hard working. Whatever happens now, this is an extraordinary achievement. #Capeverde

Beautiful.

Argentina running out of ideas here... #ARGCVE

"YOU FLAMING GALAH! RACK OFF!!"

That other Aussie keeper must be seriously hopeless against penalties...

Blimey. Full Waddle there!

Blimey. That's an astonishing save.

Probably for the best. The sheer existential horror of a pub full of drunk, devastated England fans at 3.30am on a Monday morning was making me shudder. www.bbc.co.uk/sport/footba...

When I was about 18, a mate made me watch Don't Look Back and I watched Dylan humiliate that journalist and I decided he was a cunt and I've never quite got past it. I *get* Bob Dylan. I get that he's good. But I don't like him.

The cop is used to treating brown people like this.

We've let a small coterie of people become WAY TOO RICH. And now it's too late: their crazy whims are destroying us.

Very much this. Blistering stuff on America by @iandunt.bsky.social

"This World Cup has been a diaspora event, a showcase for the porous nature of nationality, the success of immigrant populations. It just doesn’t fit the energy of a president who is so eager to demonise and exclude" www.theguardian.com/football/202...

I don't think she liked the VAR decision

Brutal. Absolutely brutal.

OH MY GOD!!

Ronaldo did fuck all in that game except score the pen. Martinez should have taken him off sooner.