Martin O’Neill seeing the Celtic chairman’s number appear on caller ID today

Me arriving at my desk on a Monday morning

Björn helping Laura with a jigsaw

Health Speculations Swirl As Trump Seen With Damage Numbers Above Head

West Ham lost

Obsessed with how much Ben from The Traitors looks like Brian Wilson

POV - the tree is down and the hoover is out

Gabriel Jesus making absolutely sure no-one else in the dressing room steals his favourite vest

Well, that took a turn

Wisdom from the old man

Feeling full to bursting, then someone cracks out the Lindor

A few years ago my Mum asked my Dad for a Ted Baker watch for Christmas - he did get her one but told us on Christmas Day how he’d initially struggled to find it before realising he had spent some time googling ‘Fred West watch’ by mistake.

My poor Dad has shingles for Christmas, but I’m pleased to report having called him just now that he still diligently performed his Dad duties and crowbarred a reference to ‘shingle bells’ into the conversation within thirty seconds

A lot of pressure on the birthday boy

Luna and Björn ready for Christmas

RIP. Really sad news

Always pleasant to start the day with a rude customer

Brutal afternoon ahead for the Newcastle squad

Some tasty-looking ties there

Reminiscing about the Derby County team of the ‘90s

I really thought I was past the point of being shocked by anything Trump posts online but he’s proved me wrong today. God almighty.

I knew his response to this was going to be one of the worst things he ever posted and somehow, it was even worse than I imagined it could be.

This entire weekend

The cultural impact of Rob Reiner cannot be understated. Legend isn't big enough a word. It goes to 11. You can't handle the truth. As you wish. I'll have what she's having. I'm your number one fan. You guys wanna see a dead body? The very idea of a bucket list. The West Wing. All from his movies.

It says everything about me that as a kid I read a book about a boy who wanted to be a footballer but who was terrified of scoring an own goal. I didn’t follow football back then and interpreted this to mean ‘scoring a goal all on your own’ and assumed his fear was of being the centre of attention.

‘This “Roy Hodgson” must be some sort of god over there’

Ayden Heaven is, for me, the greatest footballer to be almost named after Queen’s final studio album.

‘More to follow’ feels a bit optimistic for Scotland

Rob Hawthorne commentating on Leeds v Liverpool for Sky tonight, just as he was 30 years ago when Yeboah scored that goal in 1995

Leeds v Liverpool feels like a classic, comforting Premier League fixture on a chilly December evening. Don’t forget to leave a mince pie out for Mark Viduka.

My father-in-law saying ‘Thank-you, Tina’ after every instruction from the satnav - apparently named after Tina Turner because ‘she tells me when to turn’

‘And now, to make the World Cup draw, please welcome our guest of honour…’

Gianni Infantino

When the electric guitar bit comes in during Mike Oldfield’s In Dulci Jubilo

This week’s episode of Uncanny posing the question ‘Can an adult be considered an orphan?’

Story checks out

93-year-olds listening to The Christmas Song by Nat King Cole

Current mood

I haven’t looked forward to a show each week as much as I have The Chair Company. What an absolute treat, I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything quite like it. Tim Robinson may be the funniest man on the planet. Can’t wait for season two.

All right BBC News, have a sit down

Arne Slot

Woke up this morning utterly convinced it was Saturday. The realisation moments later was absolutely crushing

Idrissa Gueye at full-time