its amazing how much quieter my brain is when i hit the gym regularly

have my 5am classes scheduled for both today and tomorrow

Increasingly Worried Man Hasn’t Yet Come Across Any Guacamole In Burrito https://theonion.com/increasingly-worried-man-hasn-t-yet-come-across-any-gua-1819576083/

well i took a chance and bought a mango. it's not ripe. :(

who knew the hard times (making 9.50/hour) were the good ol days ($750 rent, townhouse, unlimited parking, package center, w/d, newly renovated, pool/firepit/gas grill, all utilities included, 1 block from the bus stop, 0.5 miles from uptown)

just remembered my college apartment rent was $750

started playing flute again today! crazy how easily i picked back up reading sheet music, like i remember what all the markings and notes mean too

i can get over this picture

my life is a disaster and getting worse everyday but it's a little bit funny

god mayday parade is so good

i want my music so loud that i can’t hear my life crashing and burning

god i love mayday parade

Cats. Cats never change. Postcard from my collection, no date/info.

i cant believe i lived long enough to become the villain (girl in pop punk song who parties too hard)

im being attacked by the liquid menthol core of a lozenge

lol apparently i was supposed to come in last night

it is however 50 degrees out so i will go for a walk

i was gonna hit the gym but i still have this cough that sounds like a victorian child dying of consumption and i dont think anyone wants to hear that

Phyllis had the zoomies and decided to surf across the kitchen table on my puzzle pieces

ive built myself my own personal circle of hell (cat + jigsaw puzzle)

house is clean bass guitar is in my lap dinner is on the horizon

i will never fall victim to the 30 is old mentality, yall can stay home and bed rot away the prime of your life, im gonna fucken party

oh no i let myself doomscroll too much when i was sick and now i cant put phone down

ok i officially need a new comforter

everyday i discover a new set of fingerprints somewhere on my me

I hope your new year is wet and smooth. Like a molted lizard. Like a river stone

SOUP DU JOUR | NEW YEARS EVE 🎆 He's snug as a bug and ready for the new year!

really hoping my fever breaks overnight and i can go to work tomorrow

i think im allowed to doomscroll bc im sick and i cant breathe out my nose

learning that im having a normal flare up of asthma and im kinda pissed about it

why do men sleep like theyre in a coffin

phyllis waited until i had a friend (her ops) over to produce a poopy on the floor which is illegal in every county might i remind you

every once in a while i rediscover that my friend is actually obsessed with furbies and it floors me

White House Evacuated After Trans Alarm Goes Off https://theonion.com/white-house-evacuated-after-trans-alarm-goes-off/

Congress Passes Law Banning Women From Leaving House Without Makeup https://theonion.com/congress-passes-law-banning-women-from-leaving-house-without-makeup/

Did you get something really *nice* for Christmas? Are you saving it? STOP Eat it. Slather yourself in it. Spray it on a random wfh Tuesday. Use it next time you have a meal. Make up an occasion and use it. Whatever it is don't hoard it until it's near its use by date or too precious.

i dont want to keep unpacking but theres KNIVES

slightly tortured by the fact that ive just now gotten hungry and almost everything is closed

i was gonna get drunk and unpack and instead i took off all my clothes and got into bed and have been on my phone since

can you believe i got home and crawled directly into bed

i bought 8 cds last night

my fingers are all numb omfg

SOUP DU JOUR | CATURDAY He's listening to ...Ready For It?

im really trying to stop picking at my face but i keep fucking sprouting these huge pimples

youll be pooping a waterfall and you just have to put your thong back on after

well my plan was to make breakfast while mom was at church but i got here and breakfast is made soooo

HOMETOWN ALT STATION MY BELOVED

i managed to find a church outfit i feel kinda bad for not going? however i also very much do not want to go to church

gonna go to my moms house while she's at church and make her breakfast