I will be using "It's absolute horses"

Any reckless, irresponsible developers looking for some short-term work? I need to populate a GitHub organization with apps chock-full of vulnerabilities. I'm going to try to unleash Claude on the task, but I fear that even the robot can't reach the level of incompetence that I require for this.

Current Status: Printing a JIRA

How am I only just now hearing off repebble.com!?

Is this anything?

Sleep disruptors move fast and wake things

If you get 16 speeding tickets in a year, they should punch out squares on a loyalty card, and you should automatically receive a seventeenth ticket complements of the house.

Mom and Pop inference shop

We do these things, not because they are easy, but because we want to drive impact through strategic partnerships and operational excellence.

Never have so many words meant so few things.

Current status: Installing @laravel.com Nightwatch for a Laravel Vapor deployed infrastructure, directly on AWS without Forge. Difficulty level: Non-trivial

The vast majority of the gameplay in high-dimensional chess is just trying to find your opponent's pieces on the board.

This latest @xkcd.com is pretty dark

The Strait of Hormuz is open but only the pure of heart may enter

Re-arranging my deck chair on the Titanic so as to be right next to the life boats.

You wouldn’t block the footpath or park in a disabled spot, so why not add alt text?

If I didn't have to constantly put all these fires I'd have time to slow down and cause less accidental fires to start.

Of course, I think we need to move to the ISO 38412:2026 standard which specifies that the countdown should start with four, with the action being synchronised with the "Go!" as research has shown that this aligns with the strongest human musical intuition across cultures. xkcd.com

*rubs tummy* Feeling hungary for some reason.

They should invent a coke that is all first sips.

At the end of the day, the important thing to remember is to set your alarm for the morning.

New favourite non-scripted podcast, @bitstormcast.bsky.social.

The genius of 67 is that they are consecutive numbers. It’s unavoidable!

Tasks wait in a list, Add, complete, and delete them Sort by urgentness

Waiting for Claudot

Okay, which of you nerds "wrote the book" on UX, and where can I buy it?

"No JIT Jerlock"

Can we not simply siphon the oil over the land?

When your cloud provider says you have too much code deployed

challenge for the nerds

Need a visual cleanse for your timeline? Try this lovely calming website I found. www.stirtingale.com

We're on a roll and we want to keep on making all of what we're doing open source and freely available Can you or your org sponsor us, partner with us or buy some of our premium products? Together we can go faster, further, for longer nativephp.com/sponsor

I regret to inform you that the Dow is now below 50k.

Are you Laracon EU? Do you identify as a woman or non-binary? Then come to the Larabelles happy hour tonight! 🫶

Me as a juniour dev: "Why can't we just upgrade all our dependencies to the latest versions as soon as they are out? We need to keep moving forward so we don't fall behind!" Me as a senior dev: "People who maintain libraries don't spend nearly enough time trying to keep their APIs stable!"

“You are a web server for [my-app.com] a social media application. You can send SQL queries to the database which has the schema below. You must parse the raw HTTP request, perform the appropriate SQL queries, and return an appropriate response to the client. Don’t forget to authorize the request!”

“I’ll eat when I’m dead”

AI Marketing for white-collar workers: "Tell your management to buy our AI tools for you otherwise you'll fall behind." AI Marketing for white-collar management: "Buy our AI tools and fire your teams otherwise you'll fall behind."

I am not saying that @nordcraft.com AI is better than a whole fleet of Claude bots, but It did one-shot a C compiler in less than 30 seconds. c_compiler.nordcraft.site

"I decline to acquiesce your pull request"

I prefer “has my dryer always made that timpani?”

I'm still available to take on freelance work. If you're looking for a Laravel developer with a lot of experience, do reach out!

Uh oh, it’s @musicologyduck.bsky.social all over again!

Gort Mortnork

You're the invigorating squid of being aggressively okay

I need to follow more developers, shill me your hidden gems! 💎

Does the boolean expression in the if statement *really* evaluate to true? #ObliqueDebuggingStrategies

I wonder if people are inherently biased towards certain version numbers of things seeming better than others, and if so, what the peak version of a thing is?