De Los Santos

Can't believe people are watching a game for third place in the World Cup when there's Regular Season Baseball on

'Stros glasses 4 the game 2day

Back in SETX and looking forward to getting cyclosporiasis this weekend ♥️

How anti-fatness can sound coming from thin people who are trying to talk about body politics: "People are being awful to her, and she's not even fat!" (would it be okay if she were?) "The BMI thinks I'M overweight!!" "It's not like I'm six hundred pounds or something!"

RETVRN

I think Kalshi should probably be illegal, but I'll admit that I have cleaned up during the World Cup by simply knowing how sponsorship agreements work.

We really used to name companies stuff like "General Electric"

The Astros are 46-48, but the guy who picks the bumper music for SportsTalk 790 remains undefeated

They René-Ma-beat that USMNT ass

Goddamn, what're they putting in those waffles

The Dr. Evil commercial has convinced me to cancel my Verizon plan

Why are Belgium's outfits pink and blue

Every time I watch a soccer game, there's some guy laying on the ground, what's going on here

Houston is now legally the capital of the United States

Yordan walk-off on the semiquincentennial, very auspicious

Doing some Iowa shit today 🌽

All fire drills ever taught me is that I should act with no urgency whatsoever when I hear a fire alarm

TONY STARK WAS ABLE TO BUILD THIS IN A CAVE, WITH A BUNCH OF SCRAPS

They call it the Embassy Suites, but they do not say which country's embassy

Country Roads is our actual national anthem

Man, what is going on in NYC?

Pretty sure I'm getting laid off tomorrow 🤘

I'm at the funeral home I'm at the hardware store I'm at the combination funeral home and hardware store

Toront-oh-no

Jays fans booing Altuve, like baby, who is your DH in this very game??

My uncle asked an English guy who was studying here and is about to leave what he'd learned about America, and the guy told him, "Not much, you've only been around 250 years." Kind of strikes me the same as saying, "What's there to learn about Germany? It's only been around since 1990."

Spaghetti throwing some meatballs

It's so weird that my parents' politics have now obligated them to like Nicki Minaj

Just a reminder that going around flood barricades is a good way to die, so please don't do that!

Congratulations to Joey Tribbiani

Do the Spurs have a humiliation kink

Okay, c'mon, not like this, Spurs

Okay, I fell for it and read the article. And no, he didn't get got by a headline writer. He actually makes the argument that TTU and company are following Maine Democrats' example.

Saw Disclosure Day, and I kinda wish I'd just rewatched Close Encounters instead

The story of Icarus provides us with a valuable lesson: never fuck up real bad

Attempting to grow mountain laurel from seed, and I got a lil sprout! 🌱

Christopher Nolan's reboot of O Brother, Where Art Thou? looks interesting, but I'm worried that it's going to be too big a departure from the original

Give the NCAA an antitrust exemption! Allow them to cap coach and AD salaries! Create a better world!

Once again: I will fight the entire city of Anaheim for Jose Altuve

Imagine being a dude from Queens, being a Knicks fan your whole life, being the President of the United States when the Knicks make the Finals for the first time in a quarter century... And then everybody in MSG fucking boos you because you're a giant piece of shit lol

Idk if Andrew is a wife guy, but I'm definitely a husband lady

Gmail marked a notice to class members in Rodriguez v. Google as spam

hey quick question, am I having a stroke

Jalen Brunson has little girl hair

Hey, this is neat, way to go WilCo!

Normally when it's 16-0 at Wrigley Field, Kirk Ferentz is grinding out the fourth quarter against Northwestern.

McLennan County got a lot of rain