Guess what?! I only went and got the bloody job!!!!!!

Nicked off the FB and I am totally here for this and will be upping my hen ma game in future.

Some really GOOD news.

And this is why we still have a moth-eaten stuffed fox (it's a looong story) bedecked with tinsel in the sitting room window. Cat.

This is glorious. Link is in the quoted post nested below this quoted post. Menz: we can't ALL be the problem. Look for the common denominator. Especially before you say it out loud.

Yes, I'm 8 now. An immature 8 year old boy who doesn't get out much.

Just your average horse and sheep running around a field chasing each other day today.

Timeline cleanse.

I have rescued Burns night chez nous by roasting the joint on top of a bed of NEEPS. I think it's an acceptable balance for an adopted Scot with Scottish bairns living with an Englisher who is fast embracing the ways. We shall light the octopus candelabra as well. Burns would be proud.

This is SUCH a tight, honest and pragmatic review. I could only hope I'd "what would Jane do" in these circumstances. I fear not - but I can certainly hold tight to "be more Jane".

Every year I remind myself I should celebrate more. Not big parties (shudder) but small, nice acknowledgements - special dinner/flowers/twinkly lights, etc to mark significant days. I've fucked up Burn's Night already, so that's a great start.

I really wish I hadn't opened the internet today.

I've just read this in between fits of giggles to A, with the preface "I have no idea what a Wipe-ism is, but..." and then I read down. And now I know. Excellent thread by @gralefrit.bsky.social.

[A pod of Orca liked this]

#chicken people - any recommendations for how to manage a hen run which has become a mud bath? They have a decent-sized covered area, but the rest is miserable. If I put straw down will that just add to the gloop by tomorrow?

Even if you are not interested in the Beckham tea, this is a fascinating insight into how 'the family'* has become a commodity and how ridiculous/awful etc that is. *Not limited to the Beckhams.

Henry has been bringing Leo a mouse every day for the last week. We thought that was bad...

The Estate's estate manager has been and we are getting a new sealed unit shower and the 1960s tiles are going and the huge gaping holes to outside all over the cottage are going to be sealed and it's the BEST DAY EVER!!!!

In other news Mr C is writing like FURY, responding to my nonsense (clue is in the name) with perfectly timed "hmmms, ohs and uhuhs" and it fills my heart with joy to see. He's properly at home now.

Clever last week me booked today off. Presentation & supporting docs to the interview panel submitted yesterday (in case of technical difficulties & yes I see the irony) and I knew I'd be fidgety & good for nothing today. It's all over bar the actual interview on Monday now. I have done my best.

Do they think we are all 5 now? I'm still reeling after the M&S soggy biscuit yoghurt cheesecake nonsense. Can they all just stop it? Please for the love of God.

What a total shit sandwich of a day. And in never thought I'd say this news - thank goodness it's run club this evening. And then cosying up on the sofa with @alistaircoleman.bsky.social.

RIP my lovely neighbour. She was SUCH a character. I'm taking a break and going to write this here so she is KNOWN. C was fiercely independent and did not like asking for help. Over the years she got to know me and trusted me. That was special in itself. C learned that I worked in IT. And the NHS.

"Electrical issues". Aye, right. 🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞

My timeline is very quiet which can only mean that t'internet is trumping 💨. And I'm not seeing any GIFs of dancing (on graves or otherwise), so it's not good news. Welcome to Dotty Keeps Up with Global Events.

I listened to more of my audiobook on the way home. Hagtale by Sally O'Reilly is BRILLIANT. I get completely lost in it & I don't want it to finish. Which is GOOD. Also 1st book on BorrowBox which is ace. Free & doesn't put LipsandTits into space. #booksky If they stayed there I wouldn't mind tbh

I bumped into Tom Baker in Weybridge Waitrose and I was not wearing a stripey scarf and I bitterly regret this.

@crunchyfrog.bsky.social happy happy birthday you x

One of these pets is better behaved than the other. Alt text for more info.

Dog behaving badly (not really, just being a dog, etc)... Me: "this dog needs BOUNDARIES" in deep strict work voice. Cat behaving badly (and yes,BAAAD)... ME: "but he's just a BAYBEEEEE!!".

That didn't work either BUT I did recognise that it would be enjoyable some other time. Found the answer: proper noise cancelling over ear headphones: now stuck into Hagtale by Sally O'Reilly. Noise sensitivity seems to be hanging on for grim death. #booksky

And by “running to art”, it’s not as an escape. It’s about bonding to humanity. I saw/heard a fiddle player, last Friday, who was so at one with his fiddle that it became a transcendental experience. The pure joy of it. Recharged me.

SOMEBODY* left a packet of butter out last night. #proofofcat This was in a closed wrapper - normally I'll come down to a little kitty tongue-shaped groove. *Me. It was me.

#proofofcat at last!!! Henry, on Leo, a dug's bed. Leo does not use it. I'm not sure he's allowed now. #caturday

I've made a wrap tank top from a wool throw which was in the bargain corner in IKEA. It's self-lined (unfortunately not lining itself like magic, which would have been triff), so it should be super cosy.

This arrived day before yesterday. I was a bit distracted what with work and nursing/deading* hen. It is FAR more beautiful than the photos can show. Layers of detail and teeny tiny brush strokes that draw you right in. I'll post a photo once it's framed. I LOVE it. Thanks @theweeowl.bsky.social!!!

Don't have #proofofcat yet for #Caturday. H WAS here, howling at the bedroom door. A got up to let H in. L, a dug followed FAST. 🌪️🌪️🌪️ Leo 🐕 now has 🐀 in mouth. Henry 🐱looking PROUD & also 😳🤔. I am employed to do Very Stern "release the 🐀 from your 🦈* NOW" voice. Rest, the GP said. *jaws. Obvs.

This is wonderful. I know we all* know how awful we were/are at being plunderous thieving knaves, but this really hammers it home, without being "I am significantly cleverer than yow" lectury. *PLU, cos we're great ;)

I am going to run club and I am going to be on time and not have to run to join the run. This time.

He also had a scone. With jam & cream . And had the audacity to do one half the WRONG WAY. In front of everyone. Including Morag*. I've never dared cross Morag. His card has been marked. *Made up name in case Morag finds us here.

I'm enjoying my gentle slide into the day, having time to journal, sew, piss about on here, etc, SO much my brain is calculating when I'll need to get up (5am on a WFH day) to keep it up after my 3 weeks 'light duties' is up. Bastard brain. It's getting better. This is the brain I know & love.

I have emotionally eaten* the posh & fancy biscuits. I can report that while very pleasant they have had exactly the same curative effect** as a packet of Lidl's own custard creams. *Inhaled **none at all and I feel as sick as a parrot

An example right now: Sadness about Dead Margaret balanced with the joy of a secret stash of Fortnum & Mason biscuits saved for INTENTIONAL emotional eating.

Get yourself a BlueSky space where you can hide from the horrors of the world and are surrounded with people who are genuinely sorry that your scabby, but beloved, hen who had 5 years extra life, has finally conked it. You're a lovely lot.

RIP Margaret. She was the most darling little red hen. I will miss her a lot.

Margaret is poorly. Margaret has an appt with the vet. I'd REALLY like to be bringing Margaret back home with us. Alive. Obvs.

Just chiming in to say "me too", another millennial who grew up with C&H. It was the first thing I'd go to in the paper, I had a pile of the books, and I saved the funny section of the last ever strip. Found it in the attic a couple years ago, and now it's on my wall!

Henry has found another bed.

We are at the cinema watching The Met's I Puritani (interval) and Mr C is FACT CHECKING it. I kid you not. It's MARVELLOUS, btw. Absolutely superb.