A Norwegian band called Chocolate Overdose. They were first on stage on the Sunday at Glastonbury 1992. One of their lyrics is seared onto my mind. "She takes advantage of my hard-on / She takes advantage of my balls / I feel like I'm roller-skating". We thought it was a roadies' joke or something.

so @stephenkb.bsky.social wins the early morning Internet because he knows how to write a subject line for his newsletter. I laughed out loud.

After all that, the only #Eurovision song I can confidently recall is the UK entry. Whatever you think of it, I reckon it passes the whistle test.

Gawd, I hate this Aussie song. Insipid, cynical #Eurovision by numbers.

This Ukraine song could be a mid-00s Depeche Mode LP track if it had Dave Gahan bellowing over it #eurovision

Everybody's takling about that kinky boot, kinky boot... #eurovision

NOT ANOTHER FUCKING ELF

Well. I never knew Vaughan Roderick was in Star Trek: Voyager

Design legend Margaret Calvert is 90 today. Look at that cake! If you've ever admired a road, rail or metro sign in Britain it's likely she had something to do with it. One of Britain's design heroes - happy birthday to her. Photo by: @oshgallerylondon (IG) Cake by: mybaker.co

May have to eat my words within the hour, but I reckon Plaid Cymru could be in "governing without Labour" territory.

Signed up with Lingopie to improve my French. Turns out it's a bit more hardcore than Duolingo.

Reform UK are refusing to explain why Nigel Farage posed for a "Christmas drink" with far-right activists, some of whom took part in a violent attack at a church. One of the men pictured with Farage was convicted of assault by beating last month, after storming an anti-racism meeting at the church

I'd be going apeshit over this

"There's no good in walking miles and miles when you get much more at Glamorgan Tiles"

Probably the only time an Oxford Synthesizer Company OSCar appeared on #totp, unless anyone knows better

Tidally locked

Imagine if Depeche Mode had been given their own computer game like Frankie Goes To Hollywood were - this could have been the loading music. As for what the game would consist of, God knows. Hiding away your PVC fetish-wear before your Mum finds it, probably. youtu.be/fvtOqqwIHEk?...

* ST CATHERINE HAS ENTERED THE CONVERSATION

Happy International Crow and Raven Appreciation Day to all who celebrate

Revisiting Rachel Hendry's conclusive piece on scampi fries after a week of pork scratchings. Cut To The Feeling — The Anatomy of Smith’s Scampi Fries — Pellicle share.google/wzesgmdt50Vq...

I had the daft notion I might cut it in academia. In the first lecture of my master's in linguistics, the guest speaker filled a board with equations, then rubbed them out and said "It's easier to make this point if I use reverse Polish notation". Knew on the spot I was fucked. Went into journalism.

This woman is giving folk with double-barrelled surnames from Mumbles a bad name

Not, as I'd wrongly assumed, an anarchic road race from sea to shining sea featuring Nerys Hughes

This is why whale punk had to happen

Well, happy thrremony at tremony at the liremony at the libraremony at the library day to all who celebrate

True is fantastic and yes, I realise I'm going to lose my #totp licence over that opinion

Other clothing brands are available #totp

Jesu Christ, superstar; He cometh down from heaven on a Yamaha; He pulleth a skid, and killeth a kid; He fractureth His stones on a dustbin lid

"Can William come round and watch a CB movie?" I'm convinced my mum thought it would be Smokey and the Bandit, rather than Breaker! Breaker! with Chuck Norris. I must have been about eight.

Brave journalists are being bullied by those who want to silence truthful reporting. It’s shameful, and libel & privacy laws need examining once again to stop bad actors exploiting them www.livpost.co.uk/three-courts...

I READ THE NEWS TODAY, OH BOY

Pretty sure Sybau and Wyll were a pair of local ne'er-do-wells in Pobol y Cwm

Yoor Party Oor Party A'body's Party

"All sandwiches £1 all day". The sign of hospitality.

This Reform leaflet from three Gateshead candidates looks like a timelapse of the same person

We need to make this the future again

When the algorithm spits out stuff like this, it's CHRIST ALMIGHTY, IT DOESN'T KNOW ME AT ALL followed 30 seconds later by CHRIST ALMIGHTY, IT KNOWS ME PERFECTLY

I never signed a release

No idea, but it reminds me of the time when the FA almost forced through a merger between Brighton, Reading and Arsenal. They decided to call the new team the Bright Red Gunners, after the first name was rejected.

Makes a change from fracturing them on a dustbin lid.

If I'd bought this for my mum, I'd have ended up in a basket on the side of the M4. #totp

This BBC News Online piece will be the most effective publicity my new documentary about Flight into Danger gets. So if you have enjoyed the programme, think you may enjoy it, or are just a kind soul, if you could please share this anywhere you think it may be worth sharing, I'd be very grateful!

You wrote a novel using AI? Cool. It's like that time I ran a marathon using a Ford Focus.

The hot-cross-bun conundrum: wait for the grill, or hammer the bastards flat and stuff them down the toaster?

Love the tale that repairmen in London used to chalk LEB OFF on installations where they'd cut off the electricity. Schoolchildren thought this was slang scrawled by older kids, and started telling each other to "leb off".

Ain't no swag like "Dad clearing out the spare room" swag

Thirty-one years ago, I lived in the third-floor garret above this shop - and it looks exactly the same as it did in 1995. I fear for the day when I come back to this street and Unicorn isn't here.

Brilliant bit of guerilla advertising from Sir Paul McCartney, sneakily sneaking a kid dressed as him in the 50s into a Google Streetview picture holding a big sign advertising his new premium rate telephone chat service. Love it.