Well, yeah, I'd love to meet you wherever these are.

I flew too close to the sun here.

Idc. I'm going to have fun watching the greatest tight end of all time play for my team today! Let's fucking go❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Did Brady just say, "I know he's pissed off?" 🤣

Chiefs out. Entering my hater era.

Get out you dirty fucking bitch

INTO THE SUN

Strawberry banana is the worst flavor combo. It had to be said.

Just found out I'm the age where if I see someone working on a commercial building, I want to stop and say, "what are they puttin in there?"

In the Midwest we call it by it's full Christian name, Ross Dress For Less.

lol what do you MEAN we won

🙏🙏🙏

KAREEM❤️

relatable

I wish every NFL announcer would get off Jawaan Taylor's dick.

MFR

Ok I was acting wild.

COTY idc idc idc

Andy Reid has elephant nuts.

Did they sincerely just put up Rashee's arrest record in a graphic? I hate this league sometimes.

I like Joe Buck's Pussy-Bow Pink lipgloss.

WHY WAS THAT RAT ON TV?!

Cats are always acting scorned when they haven't been at all scorned.

Just decided how I want my will read

I guess I just hopped on to complain about football which i simultaneously also live for.

I do not like the background chime sounds on the broadcast.

I didn't like her calling him "Todd" instead of Coach Bowles.

Man, baseball is such a beautiful game.

"What radicalized you?" The Dollar General deodorant alarm.

This is how man your siblings can get you. I don't even smoke!

Shaq was right about the gas.

I love this version of our team where we are playing with some urgency that's not chaos.

WE DONT WANT YOU HERE

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING?! SMDFTB, BUTKER.

FUCK YESSSSSSSSS

Collinsworth can make me hate him within 3 minutes of kickoff.

Jaxson Dart and Cam Skattebo are also going to have a multi-hour meeting after this game but it's just going to be them hitting wrestling finishers off the couch on each other

My team may have lost the week but at least I get to see Nick Sirianni get dog walked.

Man I just feel disappointed.

Let's talk about the kicker.

Kareem looked like he was fired out of a gun.

Heard a lot of "CHIEEEEEEEFS" after "home of the...".

It's not obnoxious enough to just be vegan. I'm going to start calling fruit "Nature's Candy".

Citizen, your microwave with Hot Pocket/Not Hot Pocket Technology knows you are trying to circumvent intellectual property law by selecting the chimichanga setting. Please remain seated while we dispatch a reeducation officer.

Just saw a big toe sized spider on my truck. My long and storied spider pestilence continues.

Am I alone in thinking that it's insane that Pete Davidson is performing for the dudes that killed his dad?

Love driving any highway in Kansas City never knowing how many tires I'll make it home with!

I guess this is my Saturday.

Link to cancel- help.disneyplus.com/article/disn...

Hulu and Disney plus are now offering 70% off subscriptions, and in response I am offering Hulu and Disney plus 70% off deez nuts.