Hot Ones but it's superglue

KRAMER: She gave herself a name, Jerry. Nova. GEORGE: Already? JERRY: Who's Nova? KRAMER: It's the name she chose. Beautiful, isn't it? GEORGE: You got a name? It gave me a crisis hotline! JERRY: Nova's not a name, come on. ELAINE: I knew a Nova. German shepherd. GEORGE: It banned me, Jerry!

the premise of most modern horror movies is "what if mom was behaving really fucked up"

Bruce Springsteen recording "Nebraska":

developing a version of hanlon's razor for how people talk now, current draft is "never attribute to AN OP what can adequately be explained by LACK OF BALL KNOWLEDGE"

best thing about the french is that they'll look at the emerging standard monopoly service and go "nope, we're doing our own that thing, but french"

Deleting Signal now that I know it's compromised. Find me when ye shall search for me with all thy heart. Jeremiah 29:13

the gift of prophecy

i'll just be a second babe i'm unlocking claude zalgo mode

they're calling it the sweatiest, most slack-lipped praise kink of all time

jake "ever given" lang. big bitch stuck

i feel like i have been condescended to by a woman who looks exactly like this thousands of times

the hell you say

turns out chud rhodesia is just white zimbabwe

if kirby eats a bra does he become two kirbys

(creed arms into a sea of haters) classic cars are boomer bullshit. built like trash to last 2 years so you'd ratchet up their fake brand hierarchy. ride like a wrestler in pool floaties, Z-grade leather flaking. designed by a closeted oklahoman obsessed with the other closeted oklahoman at chrysler

This is what happens, Larry. This is what happens when I truly let someone get close to me. The real me.

claude code is fucking insane i know literally NOTHING about Hegel. ZERO. and it just built me a complete system of German idealism

all right everyone stop posting for 2 minutes and take a break. i recommend box breathing or studying your fingernails. starting...now

look around you at these monsters celebrating a death. 2025 was doing public discourse the right way. and they killed it

BEN SHAPIRO: Well Bari, I completely agree that Scrooge is an antisemitic caricature, but he's also correct

zillow wrapped subtly dunking on me for living in the same place this whole year

[claire danes and leonardo dicaprio pinky swearing on the romeo + juliet set, 1996] So we agree that we both go out and do as much "snot acting" as possible for the next 30 years?

you're welcome for my attention to that matter

is the tail part of the ass

"everyone is 12" and "everything is pro wrestling" and "everything is sports betting" are all merely shadows of a higher dimensional shape

went to rocky horror at the admiral at midnight, took a random polaroid of a girl wearing choke chain and electrical tape bra and making a funny face for the camera, never spoke to her. ~3y later i'd been dating a girl i met online for a few months before i recognized her from my own picture

What oh nothing just powerscaling the knights of the round table

what's the most common color, do you think? i gotta go with yellow

i would prefer not to

song that plays when you encounter a qanon brony youtu.be/nApfhU0Wwvs

Pitchfork's Authoritative Ranking of the Top 100 Positive Integers

the reason that stupid asshole is in the news again is they are completely unable to experience shame. the world as it is rewards shamelessness. the lesson of that stupid asshole is to change this

i wish i knew how to show people how good i am at self-promotion

a significant way that a magic 8-ball is a superior fact-finding device to an LLM is that a magic 8-ball will sometimes tell you it doesn't know

most insidiously evil company since countrywide

i think i understood what the internet was going to be when that "maddox" guy got an email from a 13 year old who was trying to dunk on him for misspelling "insane", and then maddox (an adult man) put the email on his blog with the kid's full name and mocked him for not knowing the word "inane"

turns out the jury duty online form just had a nice convenient box for "don't pick me"

if you do your own research for once, you'll find these people have a whole code language where "procuring a burmese girl for donald trump" just means going to comet ping-pong for a pizza

ya gotta trust me man, my posts are incredibly insightful

[INT. situation room] WILES: Uh-fee-bo-fee-lee-yuh. Everyone together. BONDI, LEAVITT, CHEUNG, ETC: Ephebophilia. VANCE: It's _different_ and _not as bad_. EVERYONE: It's different and not as bad.

no, YOUR silence speaks volumes. MY silence is very economical with words

i do not care about and will ignore any bullshit about "scientific racial differences" because all people are my brothers and sisters. star bellied sneetch ass nonsense

Alien: Earth (2025)

you people really put the "mental" in "fundamental attribution fallacy". whereas i am merely having "fun" with it

just realized that racist teens are probably already accusing other kids of botting the likes in real life

rich guy who's so mad that mamdummi will ruin new york with islam that he moves to dubai