after millions of views and shares of my Portland Frog art. (thank you all🙏🏾) I got requests to highlight priests, and chickens, and Chicagoans, and T-Rexes, and more… all of us who refuse to bend the knee. so this is for US. 𝚂𝚝𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚃𝚊𝚕𝚕. 𝚆𝚎 𝚆𝚒𝚕𝚕 𝚆𝚒𝚗.

As a firstmother in an open adoption: The agency touted it as a “win win win”. “Keep in touch with your baby!” their ad in the yellow pages sang. “Adoption - the loving option”. Openness is not legally binding. The grief & guilt nearly killed me.

Have we done like Read Ats yet? Like you bring things to READ AT ICE agents & other cops at these protests & actions? Could do something classic like The Constitution or 1984, but something really funny, or artful, or smutty as a kind of dissonance might be cool. Like imagine...

😂

Early this morning I went to Rotary Park and spread my portion of Chris’ ashes beneath our favorite tree. It was anticlimactic. I miss my best friend. But I am grateful that we belonged to each other for as long as we did. Today marks 2 years since he left this timeline.

Grief shows up in various ways. I didn’t realize my hair was part of it. #widow #grief

Remember last week when we didn’t have a clergy member pleading for mercy? Dig out your #Resist pants. I promise they’ll fit.

Writing, writing and writing. For the first time in 8 months, I feel I’m getting somewhere. Need to keep the momentum.

I ran into some acquaintances over the weekend who didn’t know Chris died. It’s awkward at this stage, 20 months later. Like “Oh hey, how’s it going? I’m doing well, thanks. Chris? Not so much.” I always feel terrible having to relay the news. #widow

May the Winter Solstice set your intentions for brighter days. Happy Yule.

Last night’s sunset over the strip mall.

How many pots of coffee are required before family dinner? I’m working on pot 2 but somehow it doesn’t seem enough.

Unbeknownst to her, I heard one of Chris’ former employers talk about him. She was sweet and approving of his performance, which she wasn’t when he worked for her. Then she discovered he died. I felt nothing, except knowing he’d be pissed off with the long overdue accolades. It was weird. #widow

I can’t wait to have my second cup of coffee on Thanksgiving morning and celebrate my favorite tradition

I think about this often.

I recently deleted my account “over there”. Looked at my last post. I took this photo with some others for the “home clipboard” of notes, photos and ephemera when he was in the induced coma. He’d live for six weeks after this day. Was weird to see. #Widow

Come down & sit for a spell. #CapeMay

The anticipation is palpable.

Elon Musk runs on 100% renewable narcissism.

I told myself to spend yesterday doing something I love and keep out of my head. It didn’t work. I finished this project and hated the way it was completed. I’ll rip it apart and start again. That’s what I do. Rip and start again.

If you’re not following, you’re missing on one of my favorite artists.

I possess the remarkable skill of nodding off with half a cup of coffee in my hand. And not spilling.

This. With little to no support and a ticking time bomb in my belly, I did what everyone said was “the right thing”. The grief and sorrow nearly killed me. The adoption system needs reform on many levels. msmagazine.com/2024/11/20/a...

I’ll continue to bust out this sign again and again and again. #ReproductiveRights

The monsters under your bed aren't all evil, some of them are just to make sure you're doing okay

Really, 2024 has been all about making friends with my neighborhood opossums. This is Lou.

A piece I made in 2018 that I love a lot

Jet Girl has had enough of my bullshit

One thing that’s been the hardest since Chris died is that I don’t have anyone to talk shit with. I miss drinking coffee and talking shit.

Sweetie, please get out of my recycling.

If you’re ordering in during this shitty-ass storm, you’d better tip your delivery person handsomely.

Lotus in her whisker-y glory.

Amidst the grief, there is Bruce Springsteen

I get caught up in this mess often - the side hustle

I write nonsense about widowhood open.substack.com/pub/barbsobe...

Underrated pleasure: new toothbrush.

"HOLY. FUCKING. SHIT." - cats

(fred schneider voice)

Making new routines for this new life I’ve been handed is one of the most difficult parts about widowhood (4 months in). I spend a good amount of time wondering what to do next. Coffee is usually the answer. Otherwise I’m aimless and unmoored. And buried in paperwork.

Prime day was pretty great this year.