An old man just sat down in the A&E waiting room and opened a box of pizza, like he's paused in a scenic spot to have a bit of lunch

Just seen ‘We will remember them’ on the front of a bus and thought, they’ve never done a war film from the perspective of a Stagecoach have they

Deep dish et decorum est

pre-writing a devastating obituary for your enemy is god-tier hating of a kind you don’t often see anymore. renaissance haterism. beautiful stuff.

Went out to do a walk and a cry. Then had to flee for my little life cos some kids behind me started letting off leftover fireworks just as the second verse to Sinead O'Connor was starting up

Goodbye, Shirley Valentine ❤️

Goodbye, Shirley Valentine ❤️

Goodbye, Shirley Valentine ❤️

Right, I’ll be honest, I saw the timid teenage boy with headphones on the John Lewis advert and immediately feared the worst

But did they ever think of doing a topless brunch

New episode just rolled out! We’ve covered Tina; now it’s time for the steady, bluesy original. Andrew looks at “Proud Mary” and the brief but productive career of Creedence Clearwater Revival. Available to listen on Spotify, Apple Podcasts and via Andrew’s website: 500songs.com/podcast/2714/

Whenever I'm with him, something inside…🎶 Today we’re revisiting Episode 111: “Heat Wave” by Martha and the Vandellas, and the beginnings of the legendary Holland-Dozier-Holland. Available to listen on Spotify, Apple Podcasts and via Andrew’s website: 500songs.com/podcast/epis...

Hallowing the ween etc

I confess wild horses COULD drag me away. In fact it would only probably take a single very sickly one

TV production company: What’s the premise? What’s the conflict? Me: A pudding’s life is turned upside down after unexpectedly becoming a pineapple upside-down pudding

Just smiled at a new mum in the supermarket with her week-old baby. She smiled and nodded back, initially in solidarity, then realised I was cradling a two pack of flame baked naan breads

A pumpkin just feels like a lot of unnecessary effort, to me. Why must I scoop out this stubborn flesh with a tablespoon?? I signed up to carve a silly window decoration, not perform complex neurosurgery on a gourd

I’m sorry but these sound like vintage esoteric euphemisms for “homosexual”

Opened the fridge. Just read the back of a tub of ricotta that instructs, ‘consume within 24 hours.’ That’s not a cheese. That’s a time bomb

The NHS, once a year, every year: #CelebrityTraitors

I wrote a lovely poem about the good old days, to go with the nice pink one off Facebook that's quoted below.

Finally, some good news! All My Worldly Joy will be published by @wiltonsquare.bsky.social early next year. (1/3)

Friend’s just posted “Halfway to meeting you, baby boy!” and their costly 3D scan that looks NOTHING remotely like a baby. Tempted to start my own ultrasound scam business, selling parents-to-be extortionate sepia videos of burrata

Friend’s just posted “Halfway to meeting you, baby boy!” and their costly 3D scan that looks NOTHING remotely like a baby. Tempted to start my own ultrasound scam business, selling parents-to-be extortionate sepia videos of burrata

Writing headshot, innit

The new series of The Assembly dropped on ITVX at the weekend, starring David Tennant and Danny Dyer. Here’s an article I wrote last year about the show’s format and portrayals of autism on screen. medium.com/@elsalwillia...

Life has felt heavier recently. Going to try and make Medium articles more of a regular thing. Hoping to put miscellaneous stuff out there that’s more difficult to pitch, in the hope of keeping talking about something, anything. So here goes.

Somebody told me I’m looking more ‘soft butch’ these days. Which sounds a hell of a lot less like a lesbian and more like a sandwich spread, or a cream cheese. I can’t think of many things more lovely, to be honest with you

For sale: Baby. Shoes never worn. Somebody buy my shoeless baby. His feet are fucking disgusting.

This video advert just popped up on my feed and the first two lines made me start snorting uncontrollably. I’m going to hell

How has no one asked Celia Imrie about Scottish country dancing yet?! #celebritytraitors

Keep seeing that AI generated image trend of adults being embraced by their ‘inner child’ selves. And I’m sorry but I don’t believe for one second that our inner children would be anything other than appalled at us

Jane Goodall offers sage advice for the rest of us. #3E

Knickers at half mast today everyone, for Jilly Cooper x

Currently doing social media management for Andrew Hickey’s 500 Songs Podcast. If you fancy giving the Bluesky and Instagram accounts a follow, that would be amazing. Bluesky: @500songspodcast.bsky.social Instagram: www.instagram.com/500songspodc... (@500songspodcast) Cheers!

This jacket makes me feel like a Dad in a Jacqueline Wilson novel about to recklessly abandon his kids for a pint

This is in line with thoughts I’ve been having. Friendship is so elusive. I’m come back a little to reading about autism after getting fed up with thinking about it, and I actually think I’m so autistic. So in myself. My masking was always PITIFUL if present at all. And importantly, thank you Elsa

Oof, damn this is real. The experience of the adults around you looking at you like some kind of misshapen garment or crooked plant, not quite sure what to do about it, not quite willing to tell you what's going on. Just a vague sense of doing it wrong and internalizing it your whole life.

"I’d started to have a sense of myself as an uneasy subject that needed to be wrapped in something palatable. I learned sarcasm and witticisms and quips, and about how to be funny when everything else failed." I've never felt so simultaneously called out and SEEN 😳😭

This is a tremendous piece of writing. Well worth your time.

This is great. I certainly relate to experiencing hostility as a child, not just from other children but from adults. People catch on pretty quickly. I also relate to memorising things.

"I can see why plenty of autistics are drawn to doing stand-up. Somebody I know recently told me they couldn’t imagine subjecting themselves to such a humiliating game of risk, night after night. For autistic people every interaction feels this way, so perhaps for us there’s little difference." real

Brilliant writing from Elsa - as usual

Hello. It is my birthday tomorrow. In the spirit of it, if you fancy getting our whole team a gift AND a gift for an autistic person you love (or a not-quite-autistic-yet person who isn’t taking the hint), you can gift memberships to our Patreon (& get 20% off when you upgrade to a year)