Only Phil Hartman could do a better impression of Mike "I don't know shit" Johnson.

At least we know this time that once the confederacy is defeated, we destroy them once and for all. None of this reconstruction bullshit. Outlaw the fucking red hats and hunt down every former gestapo traitor.

ARREST THEM NOW

I want everyone who has spent years in therapy wondering what is wrong with them, wondering why they had so many bad relationships, why they felt so much dread, to know that it was in part because you were living in a world run by evil, evil people and you could tell that somewhere deep down

Trump watches "Taken" backwards so it's a happier ending.

"About 500 seniors live at Sinai Residences in Boca Raton, Florida, including many Holocaust survivors. Recently, some of them asked if they could hide the building’s Haitian staff in their apartments." This broke me.

How many bars, restaurants, and convenience stores have Steven Seagal characters destroyed?

How do they find time to fuck kids when they're so busy fucking us all?

35 years and I never knew the Wet/Sticky Bandits had last names.

I know we're only 4 episodes in but season 2 of #ThePitt just isn't hitting the way season 1 did. Robbie seems like a second tier character & the new, duller cast members are taking up space that could've been used to develop the great cast we already had. Docs are connecting w/ patients too much.

This dude even gets malware in his pants.

It's the motherfucking worst when funny people die. You can literally feel the light dim in the world every time. And we just lost two in one day.

God damn it, man. Just last night I was in bed watching Sanford & Son clips at 2am on YouTube trying not to wake my wife from laughing.

It's kind of amazing that the richest, most powerful men in the world have to pay for pussy. Absolute fucking losers.

Had a great exchange with an Iranian salesman at the Glenmorangie store at Heathrow. He even gave me his Persian chicken wings recipe to pair with the bottle I bought. I'm so sick of these imperialist motherfuckers pitting us all against each other and going to war for bullshit. So sick of it.

Just landed back in America. Fuck Trump, fuck MAGA, fuck ICE.

They're killing Americans and arresting journalists. At what point do we just declare the civil war and get this over with? There is only one kind of Nazi welcome in modern America. A dead one.

🍋 FREE DON LEMON! 🍋

Can we deport Cuck Schumer and Hakeem Jeffries? Jesus fucking christ.

I can smell my Uber driver's dogshit morning breath from the back seat. He's not even talking.

Buy guns

@hakeem-jeffries.bsky.social You absolutely useless motherfucker.

Taking my first dump in the UK. Cheerio!

🚨Jerkoff Alert🚨

They really have no fucking idea what is coming. No fucking idea.

Really sick of these idealistic dipshits who assume that things will just naturally work out the same way they did in 1945. Victory isn't guaranteed and these evil bastards have infinitely more resources and tools for control.

Other than that, Mrs. Lincoln, how was "Melania"?

build relationships with: • drug dealers • aspiring ecoterrorists • strippers • biohacker gremlins • yaoi artists • ppl w/ arson charges • 30-50 feral hogs • sluts • vampires • thick werewolves • ppl on 5 different stimulants • tranarchists • dudes who self-suck • heretics • big titty goth gfs

Anti-ICE demonstration on Friday in downtown Miami at the Torch of Friendship, 7PM

Heading to London. Try not to let the Nazis win while I'm gone.

CUT THE FUNDING!!! EVERYTHING ELSE IS WINDOW DRESSING

I assume this was unanimously approved by the Board of Peace?

"You raise your voice, I erase your voice." Meet 𝐄𝐝𝐠𝐚𝐫𝐝𝐨 𝐆𝐨𝐧𝐳𝐚𝐥𝐞𝐳, an ICE Deportation Officer from Miami, FL (originally from Puerto Rico). Gonzalez has lived in Miami and Hollywood, FL. He decided it would be fun to travel to Miami to kidnap and threaten people. #OneOfOursAllOfYours #UnmaskICE

South Korea is just rubbing it in at this point.

Kristi Gnoem

When he dies, we are going to dance in the streets, guzzle champagne, and there's isn't a single solitary motherfucking thing you pearl-clutching hypocrite shitstain MAGA motherfuckers can do or say about it.

My grandfather once told me that when he was in WWII, he was driving one of those big convoy trucks when he noticed a group of Nazis hiding behind a row of bushes. He then proceeded to drive through the bushes. Anyway, #AbolishICE

Greg Bovino's favorite TV show.

One small thing you can do today: ICE is ramping up in Maine. Food For All is delivering meals to 300 families that can't leave their homes. They need $7k a day to continue operations. The Culture Study community is raising enough to cover a day—join us? Donate directly: givebutter.com/Scx87A or

Shit is so fucked in this country that the Vice President announced his wife is expecting and I didn't hear about it until a week later.

Anytime ANYONE says "Who brings a gun to a protest?", just reply "Kyle Rittenhouse, now shut the fuck up".

The most ironically named person to attack the dems.

Trump isn't "doing the right thing" here. His feeble brain may be cooked from all the genetically inherited dementia and a steady diet of fryer grease and high fructose corn syrup, but he knows what he's doing. This is no victory and never will be until ICE is no more. Do not let up. #AbolishICE

The biggest risk in this moment is something sociologists call “symbolic compliance.” That’s when an institution that is violating civil rights gives the public just enough symbolic victories that accountability efforts lose steam before there has been any meaningful change.

May Greg Bovino never know a moment's fucking peace. He should be shunned, harassed, and kicked out of everywhere he goes. He has destroyed countless lives and should never forget it. This will not appease us. #ABOLISHICE

Oh shit, I might be in London by the end of the week. HYPED