major traffic incident

throwback to when I created the silent hill ascension choir on my stream

That's me

☁️

look!! at my brave baby! who came to look at me from a safe distance this morning!!!!

wait, *top players* don't... want me to... what? why???

*wakes up in a cold sweat* i want to go to the beach (???)

ok but really why do cat toys make me feel so sad

the most direct interaction i have had with my cat ever is her PUSHING THIS DOOR OPEN to watch me poop in the middle of the night. why!!!!

i think and quote this all the time

musicians who are really into giant partners are always posting "big things coming"

every cat on earth is approaching your location

This is my substitute for pistol and ball.

Long ass text post from Tumblr

it's holding him thursday

Tricking the Internet into showing me hot trans people by joining pages and groups for hot trans people. Further deepening the ruse by posting selfies of myself (a hot trans person) to bait out more

Never forget the time I had to contact my local costume shop on Facebook. The last-minute hospital pass by David to Sonya is exquisite.

Ma'am, why are you behaving like this?

My mom keeps dinosaur figures outside to scare off raccoons who want to steal her garbage. She sent me a photo today. A large toad has found one of the dinosaur figures and befriended it. They are besties now.

same

well, if you say so!

Ash had meant to say, "I'd like to drive down to the tip of the bay," But this, inexplicably, was not what came out of their mouth. What they said instead was a sentence that they had never heard nor thought in their life. "I want to watch the Glass Lady, rising over the ocean."

this is just brutal and I'm old enough to know it's true

Ash had meant to say, "I'd like to drive down to the tip of the bay," But this, inexplicably, was not what came out of their mouth. What they said instead was a sentence that they had never heard nor thought in their life. "I want to watch the Glass Lady, rising over the ocean."

Hello, and welcome to my body shop! Oh, it's you! You came again! Which body do you want?

[yelling over club noise] I said a giant sadness has come between us

very funny recurring [demi/ace who doesn't really do their Sex Homework] experience is occasionally coming across a diagram and finding it very inscrutable. "Ok, I see from the way you're saying to stroke this ice cream cone that it represents an organ of the human body. fuck if I know which one."

"i plan to clean up some old drafts and get them released soon" - a statement by an utter fool. my body and brain and heart hurt and i slept on my floor last night and rolled in cat hair and everything feels weird. here is a Place you can go to.

*worst person you knew in college voice* i am looking sooooo respectfully. my gaze respects you so hard. you are so valid. and i am looking

"i plan to clean up some old drafts and get them released soon" - a statement by an utter fool. my body and brain and heart hurt and i slept on my floor last night and rolled in cat hair and everything feels weird. here is a Place you can go to.

thank you, Moby Dick bot

this dumbass just sent my family group chat a multiple paragraph coming out letter. this dumbass has to sleep somehow. for the cat

There's always time for fun...It's Friday night.

*sobbing* j .. just put me in a camp... it's what he would have wanted....

they house my brain in this device

My cat watching me make bird sounds in bed

I guess this has probably already gone viral somewhere but I am simply dying at this picture of a bear that looks like it hired a photographer to do a glamour shoot

Same