Wow! What a night! Parteeee! The kitchen is a complete mess! There’s no way we’ll have it sorted before the move. I’ve never seen so many empty bottles………. 😉😉 #TheArchers #RevengeOfTheNonSpeakers

We came We saw Sat on lucrative property price inflation And now we’re cashing in. We may have a surprise for you before we go 😏😏 @keriwarbis.bsky.social @thecidershedpod.bsky.social #TheArchers

Just wanted to say… Thanks Peggy. It’ll come in very handy. #TheArchers

That was close. I told Mick “no guests” for exactly this reason. Just imagine, Fallon getting nosy; it’d be just a small step for her to alert Ambridge’s finest detective… then they’d find it!!! 😳😳😳 (Gotta keep tabs on those two - Good job I left the cameras on in the sauna.) #TheArchers

It’s so good to have one of the village’s most admired and cultured couples housesit for us. We know our home couldn’t be in better hands. Thank you Michael and Joy. #TheArchers

We do appreciate Jez E's curiosity and Liam's plea, but we can't promose that you'll see any more of us in 2025 than you did in 2024 - We do love the shadows - but you never know! @thecidershedpod.bsky.social #TheArchers

So. Where were you all? We had mountains of food, gallons of booze and party games all ready, and not one person turned up!! Shocking! It’s not as if there’s anything better to do at 7:00pm on a Wednesday evening. We’ve learned our lesson I guess. Peasants! #TheArchers

We’ve all woken up full of Christmas cheer, which might have something to do with the lovely singing last night. So we’ve taken a decision … it’s open house at ours tonight, and you’re ALL invited. 7:00pm. Don’t be late. We have surprises!! See you all later. #TheArchers

@thecidershedpod.bsky.social We’ve been away. Can’t say where. Need-To-Know. Got back to learn that you’ve been engaging in a conspiracy to incite riot and mayhem - and that we’re the target! Well I’m reporting it to @sgtharrisonburns.bsky.social so expect the knock any moment! #TheArchers

While we’re on the subject of scams, I’d just like to point out that someone has managed to keep our Ambridge ambitions concealed for some considerable time. Just saying. #TheArchers

Just to reassure you, nobody has turned up at ours seeking holiday accommodation. In fact, nobody ever turns up at ours. We like it that way.

Does anyone have a phone number for Usha? And does she handle defamation cases? Thanks. #TheArchers

I just want to mention - we didn’t need to spend £20k when we moved in, though for a while I did want to rip out this appalling kitchen. Would have done as well, but they discovered a toxic waste reservoir underneath the island. (Gotta love a kitchen island). #TheArchers

🚨HERE WE GO! Gary Lineker to be unveiled as new Archbishop of Canterbury in January transfer window. Rumours of Justin Welby going the other way to present the BBC's News at Ten as yet unconfirmed.

I've seen quite a few people confused about who the current queen is, seemingly due to the longevity of the previous title holder. I have a simple solution: behead the monarch every five years to prevent over familiarity. Petition to follow.

I’ll remind you that this puerile behaviour is being noted. Adolescent sniggering is not what we moved to Ambridge for. We’re watching. There’s nothing to laugh at. We’re ecologists ourselves. And animal lovers. I’ll leave it for now. There’s a hungry pussy here that needs attention. #TheArchers

If anyone’s got any curtains going, we’ll have them. #TheArchers

Someone posted a Starter Pack for #TheArchers and now I’ve lost it. If anyone has it handy could you re-post please?

In this house we avoid mewserlee for breakfast. It seems the wrong thing to eat just after the sun has gone down. #TheArchers

@thecidershedpod.bsky.social Well. Thank you Matthew I don’t think! I’m looking at a wreck of a kitchen. There’s Ginger Tipsy Trifle up the wall and Walter Gabriel’s Gingernuts smashed on the floor. I’m dreading Spooky Night! #TheArchers

Hi @sgtharrisonburns.bsky.social Saw this and thought of you. 👍👍 www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle...

There’s a rumour going round in the Book Of Face that we’re the wealthiest in the village. I just have to say there’s more to life etc, and money can’t buy a happy wife - though, @sgtharrisonburns.bsky.social - message from Fallon: “pull ya finger out!” I’m off to the accountant. #TheArchers

@sgtharrisonburns.bsky.social Are you ok mate? Need to talk? If you want to pop round for a chat just say, (it’ll have to be through the letter box, because - you know - ssshhhh, but I’m a good listener). #TheArchers

Table sabbotage is no laughing matter. It’s got to be done just right - and with discretion! Practicing in advance is key, otherwise it could lead not only to failure - but to getting spotted. It’s something we know only too well. 👀👀🤫🤫🤫 #TheArchers

I’m not saying Jazzer didn’t need help with his act of horticultural larceny, but I am saying I was home at the time, right? I had nothing to do with it, yeah? And no one can prove otherwise! #NoFaceNoCase #TheArchers

Reform has been shown repeatedly to lie outright about immigration, and use language liable to stoke division. Ahead of its party conference, it's important to recognise that they do not represent the majority view and should not be pandered to. #R4today www.redpepper.org.uk/society/migr...

Did someone say there’s a job going The Tearooms. I can do 1am to 4am if that’s any help? (Just checking - it’ll be ok not to put the lights on?) Leave me a message under the rock by the gate if interested. (Tell no one!) #TheArchers

Go on @thecidershedpod.bsky.social Rub it in why don’t you. We’d all love to have that @keriwarbis.bsky.social suntan, but it would mean venturing out. In daylight!! 😱😱😱😱 #TheArchers

Hurrah! The Gills are here! 😂 #TheArchers