James Schlarmann
@jamboschlarmbo.bsky.social
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Bad Lib. Amateur Professional. Friendly Neighborhood Satirist
https://linktr.ee/jamboschlarmbo
pinned post!
Why should any American pay their taxes? If the President can get a lifetime pass on tax fraud, why canāt we?
about 2 months ago
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My new one today explores the relationship between stupid nerds and their big feelings about leftists.
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MAGA Nerds Are Very Confused About Violent Left-Wing Terrorism
Like voter fraud, a made-up problem with only fascist solutions.
https://jamboschlarmbo.substack.com/p/maga-nerds-are-very-confused-about
about 22 hours ago
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Mueller, She Wrote
1 day ago
The best way to get to the bottom of the McConnell question is for the governor to appoint a replacement. The GOP legislature passed a law stripping him of that power, but it goes against the state constitution. If they refuse to seat the replacement, take them to court. Thereās zero downside.
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Todayās Substack might be a little personal to me.
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Facebook Verified Support Would Prefer I Die to Supporting Me
ā¦having to tell Mark Zuckerbergās AI assistant the correct date is almost too on the nose.
https://jamboschlarmbo.substack.com/p/facebook-verified-support-would-prefer
2 days ago
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Just got my first paid Substack subscriber. Donāt know how to feel about something NOT feeling like a slap in the face. I do love this feeling of gratitude, though, and wouldnāt mind feeling it a lot more.
3 days ago
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Iām allegedly a writer. So that means I write, I guess?
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Things to Do While Ignoring a Daughter-Lusterās Primetime Lies
A handy, well-researched menu of options.
https://jamboschlarmbo.substack.com/p/things-to-do-while-ignoring-a-daughter
3 days ago
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Back on my meme making shit cuz why the fuck not?
3 days ago
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Todayās writing prompt:
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On Cry Baby Sore Loser Bitches
Think of all the fun I can have not watching a presidential address.-
https://jamboschlarmbo.substack.com/p/cry-baby-sore-losers
4 days ago
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Itās my personal pet theory.
#stephenmiller
#ice
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Someone With Brown Skin Hurt Stephen Miller's Feelings Once So Now ICE Gets to Murder Us
That's how I see it, anyway.
https://jamboschlarmbo.substack.com/p/who-hurt-stephen-miller
5 days ago
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MadGreek š§æ
6 days ago
Who knows this killer???
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Every ICE Agent is a Nazi.
5 days ago
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”SATIRISTAS!
7 days ago
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MelusineMarianne.bsky.social
7 days ago
All in all, a pretty good eulogy.
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My piece on Lindseyās death.
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Hey MAGA, Mind If I Use My Freedom of Speech?
One has to wonder what they will let me say about Lindsey Graham, now that he's dead,
https://jamboschlarmbo.substack.com/p/hey-maga-mind-if-i-use-my-freedom
7 days ago
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7 days ago
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”SATIRISTAS!
8 days ago
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Molly Knight
7 days ago
Really gonna need people On Here to start taking little wins when we get them or else we are not gonna make it. Any champion athlete who opts out of going to visit Trump in the White House for any reason is good. Please stop searching for reasons to be miserable.
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If those snowflake bitches thought it was mean to quote Charlie Kirk, theyāre gonna absolutely hate what I have to say about Lindsey Graham for the rest of my life.
7 days ago
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I hope the closet in Hell is as comfortable as can be for olā Lindsey.
7 days ago
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Today, I wrote about a subject with unending depths to plumb ā the stupidity of MAGA.
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The Common Clay of the MAGA Movement
You know...morons.
https://jamboschlarmbo.substack.com/p/common-clay-maga-movement
8 days ago
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Joe Thomas
8 days ago
Marco Rubio: "Let me explain this in simple English: Iran is run by lunatics, religious fanatic lunatics.ā That statement would have so much more gravitas if Rubio's own country wasn't also run by religious fanatic lunatics.
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Governor Tim Walz
9 days ago
After a months-long occupation, Minnesota is still recovering from a retribution campaign waged by the federal government. Now, Minnesota stands with Houston in demanding accountability for the fatal shooting of Lorenzo Salgado Araujo. This bloodshed cannot be normalized.
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Even though Iām very used to being grossed out by my country, todayās Substack is about a feeling Iām having right now.
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On Being Broke and Watching a Corpse Still Collect His Paychecks
Taxation without representation is now a feature, not a bug.
https://open.substack.com/pub/jamboschlarmbo/p/on-being-broke-and-watching-a-corpse?r=18kmzw&utm_medium=ios&shareImageVariant=card
9 days ago
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GOOD
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9 days ago
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A new thing I wrote today that you can read if thatās your bag.
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MAGA's Frankstein Problem
MAGA Influencers are currently locked in a pissing contest over Charlie Kirk's killer's trial, and I love that for them.
https://jamboschlarmbo.substack.com/p/magas-frankstein-problem
10 days ago
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Boring shit for boring broken brained buttholes. My newest.
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Red Scare Red Meat for Red State Meatheads
Trump's sudden attacks on "communism" explained for people who actually know what communism is.
https://jamboschlarmbo.substack.com/p/red-scare-red-meat-red-state
11 days ago
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Allow me to give Grant the advice his own conscience didnāt give him when he and his victim needed it most: JUST. PULL. OUT.
11 days ago
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Todayās Substack is about letting Mitch take his time while apartment hunting for the afterlife.
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Don't Rush Mitch McConnell to the Exits
Picking out your eternal living space is a big decision for anyone, much less a racist husk of a man.
https://jamboschlarmbo.substack.com/p/dont-rush-mitch-mcconnell-to-the
12 days ago
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Please clap for episode #23 of the podcast I do with the high-larious
@zachmillerdawg.bsky.social
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Bad Libs: The Afterbirth #23 - "Crows Give Us Hope For MAGA"
YouTube video by Bad Libs: The Afterbirth
https://youtu.be/7ipw7qTeel8?is=woROJzMwqamZ5vd9
13 days ago
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Hereās a new thing I wrote today.
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I Ignored Donald Trump's America 250 Speech Like I Ignore Everything He Says
Like a permanent gift to my mental health state...
https://jamboschlarmbo.substack.com/p/i-ignored-donald-trumps-america-250
14 days ago
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Wrote something today for the occasion. Read it if you wanna.
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How Long is 250 Years, Really?
It all depends on your perspective.
https://jamboschlarmbo.substack.com/p/how-long-is-250-years-really
15 days ago
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Please consider reading my latest Substack.
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Worst. Party Host. Ever.
Would YOU go to an event hosted by Jeff Epstein's BFF if he'd spent ten years insulting you?
https://jamboschlarmbo.substack.com/p/worst-party-host-ever
16 days ago
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If Mitch dies, can he still proxy vote from Hell?
16 days ago
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Que Trumpo, Chingadoro.
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17 days ago
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Cristian Farias
20 days ago
The Supreme Court Gives Donald Trump Full Control Over the Executive Branch, Except the Part of It that Impacts Their Retirement Portfolios
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The Supreme Cunts
24 days ago
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Kevin M. Kruse
24 days ago
Congress has the power to do pretty much whatever it wants with the Supreme Court. It can expand the membership of the court, and it can punish it in several ways too. We simply need to fill that Congress with a Democratic majority that has the will to use that power.
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jamelle
24 days ago
the way it works is that if i say, "i'm a black american," sam alito thinks that is "dividing people up by race." but if someone says, "get that jigaboo out of my country," alito thinks, "looks like nothing to me"
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Mueller, She Wrote
26 days ago
Bravo, sir
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”SATIRISTAS!
about 1 month ago
by Chris Britt
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”SATIRISTAS!
about 1 month ago
by Rick McKee
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Truth tastes better than bullshit. But what do I know? I just have tastebuds.
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about 1 month ago
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āI think theyāre saying āBoo-onald Trump,ā sir.ā
about 1 month ago
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Blue Fairylicious Girlš§
about 1 month ago
The news calling Simone Biles an NFL wife is the most small dick,misogynistic, flaccid penile dysfunctional energy ever. Grow up chode
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Bari Weiss is a Nazi who disguises herself in concerns about antisemitism. Thatās the post.
about 1 month ago
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”SATIRISTAS!
about 1 month ago
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”SATIRISTAS!
about 2 months ago
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I wonder if heās tried crying about it.
add a skeleton here at some point
about 2 months ago
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”SATIRISTAS!
about 2 months ago
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Aaron Rupar
about 2 months ago
Rep. Madeleine Dean: "What is true is that the president has lied about being on Epstein's plane, and the unredacted files prove that. There's a lot in here. It's all covered up."
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jamelle
about 2 months ago
crazy that under the precedent set by callais, a lily-white congressional delegation formed by "partisan" gerrymandering in a plurality black state passes constitutional muster, while any majority-minority district is constitutionally suspect
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