President assface announced a new type of large warship he is calling ‘battleships,’ marking a step toward achieving the president’s vision for a new ‘Golden Fleet.’” “The US Navy will lead the design of these ships along with me, because I'm a very aesthetic person.”

San Fran or youtube. The fun starts tomorrow.

Please be responsible. #tailsofjoy tailsofjoy.net

Saw a pretty good pre-emptive bumper sticker on a cybertruck. Clearly the person bought it before the election. It said "Elon Haters Tesla Club". Translation: "We didn't know. Please don't hurt the car".

Still shopping? I hand carried these St. Francis of Assisi charms back from Assisi after I had them blessed in the church there. You can see the video on the sales page. We hope they will keep your pets safe and well. 100% goes to #rescue #tailsofjoy tailsofjoy.net/shopping/

Oh no! I'm doing six shows in San Fransisco this upcoming week (and virtually on youtube) and now I just found out the name of the event has been changed to Trump Kung Pao Memorial Kosher Comedy.

To those who want to rename the files the "Trump Epstein" files. It's a bit long. I will from now on be calling them the "Trumpstein" files.

Stephen Miller's Matchdotcom landing page.

Thank you for your attention to this matter.

Tonight I tried to make sweet potato fries in my air fryer, but they never crisped up and I blame Joe Biden.

Another funny interview for my Dec 24 - 26th gig in San Fransisco. localnewsmatters.org/2025/12/16/a...

The only thing that stops a bad guy with a gun is a good guy with a fruit stand. Bless you Ahmed el Ahmed. May you heal fully and fast and may you be honored for the rest of your life. Thank you for your bravery and humanity.

Feverishly working on this

Fun and funny interview for the San Fransisco shows Dec 24 - 26th and virtually on youtube. I love how the writer puts up this picture and says "Elayne Boosler (right)", like I may be mistaken for the Chinese restaurant. www.ebar.com/story/161224

Happy Chanukah to my Challah back Peeps. A prayer for those lost to violence. Peace: the final frontier. These are the voyages of the starship Earth. Its mission: to embrace new worlds, to welcome all, to boldly go where no mensch has gone before. That is an Enterprise. L'Shana Haba'ah B'Vulcan.

If you're still shopping for gifts please visit us first. Every purchase saves a life, 100% of your shopping and donations go to #rescue. Thanks! www.tailsofjoy.net/shopping/

Do you think they'll let me on the plane with this? I don't have a kennel for it.

The entrance to our little town of Monteleone d’Orvieto for Christmas. It’s projected onto the entrance to our walled city. The arch is where you drive or walk in, and there are cars parked on the street too. #nofilter #Italy

Only one left! An ornament guaranteed to make you smile, if you can smile after getting Botox. 100% of your donations and purchases goes to #rescue as we are all volunteer. www.tailsofjoy.net/product-cate...

So I'm in Italy and a germaphobe LA neighbor comes over to stay a week. She's using hand sanitizer all day, paper towels no real towels, wants a new sink sponge every hour. Then she says, "I need some ice". I say "Okay!" She says, "Is it fresh?" "Is the ice fresh??" "Yes." I say "No. It's frozen."

End Wokeness!

I'm tired of posting jokes, I want to go old school and say them! LOL. Come for the comedy, stay for the Chinese food. Jews on Christmas, and everyone else. See you there. And if you can't come to San Fransisco buy tickets online and join us live on youtube.

For me still the funniest meme. Worth the revisit.

If today is a holiday shopping day for you please visit Tails of Joy first. Unique gifts and every purchase saves a life, 100% to saving animals. Fast delivery and always free shipping. Lots more at www.tailsofjoy.net/shopping/. Thanks.

Turkey surprise.

Here's your yearly chance to mock me. I was in the Macy's Parade several times but riding on the "Doodle Bug" in zero degrees, frozen to the metal, with a teenager driving the tow car and braking hard every 15 seconds almost killed me. Happy Thanksgiving everybody! www.youtube.com/watch?v=nQWJ...

Here's your yearly chance to mock me. I was in the Macy's Parade several times but riding on the "Doodle Bug" in zero degrees, frozen to the metal, with a teenager driving the tow car and braking hard every 15 seconds almost killed me. Happy Thanksgiving everybody! www.youtube.com/watch?v=nQWJ...

I don't know, I'm not feeling it. It's bad when the picture looks disgusting.. Btw, there isn't a sprig of rosemary left in any market in America. The entire country read the same roasted potato recipe.

"Former Brazilian president Jair Bolsonaro must begin 27-year sentence 4 coup attempt after losing all appeals. Brazil’s Supreme Court upheld his conviction 4 attempting a coup & the violent abolition of democratic rule of law & more." Could we get assface to Brazil (preferably in a fishing boat)?

The book is brilliant, funny, informative, and should be required reading in schools and in congress.

Trump Refuses to Pardon Turkey After it Fails to Bribe Him - ANDY BOROWITZ. On Monday Donald Trump refused to pardon the White House turkey after it failed to offer him a bribe. “That turkey is a terrible person. I have done many great things for turkeys like increasing their price by 40%."

I was eleven. Teachers started coming in the classroom and crying. A day we will never forget. A time we long for.

New Holiday Toys For republicans' Kids!! If you blocked the release of the Epstein files, you'll swell with pride when you watch your little ones unwrap this present under the tree. For ages 8 to 15.

Collect yours before the whole building is gone.

"assface unveiled a plan to dismantle the Education Department shifting most support roles to the Labor Department." Great balls of fire. You think his cult can't spell or punctuate now??!!

I don't know if any of you are on Threads but if you are and can make this link work it is astounding. www.threads.com/@iamarslan/p...

"Trump defends Saudi Prince bin Salman's killing of Post columnist Jamal Khashoggi, saying ‘things happen’". It's true. Arms get sawed off, legs get sawed off, heads get chopped off, ya end up in a suitcase. Da prince says he don't know nuthin'. Whaddaya gonna do?

Proud Libtard here.

Proud Libtard here.

At least Megyn Kelly's IQ is 15 and not 8.

Release the Epstein files.

When I can't take any more texting and writing emails for the day I stop and start streaming a show or movie, where I end up watching people texting and emailing...

The beginning of the release of the Epstein files has put me in such a good mood I am doing some holiday shopping. If you feel the same, start at Tails of Joy. Every purchase saves a life. No salaries, perks, just 100% to saving needy animals. See the rest! #TailsOfJoy www.tailsofjoy.net/shopping/

Hey Peeps, if you're starting your holiday shopping, Tails of Joy has tons of brand new holiday items, ornaments, gifts, and 100% goes to save animals' lives. Thanks! www.tailsofjoy.net/shopping/

The beginning of the release of the Epstein files has put me in such a good mood I am doing some holiday shopping. If you feel the same, start at Tails of Joy. Every purchase saves a life. No salaries, perks, just 100% to saving needy animals. See the rest! #TailsOfJoy www.tailsofjoy.net/shopping/

But his emails!!!!!!

Hey Peeps, if you're starting your holiday shopping, Tails of Joy has tons of brand new holiday items, ornaments, gifts, and 100% goes to save animals' lives. Thanks! www.tailsofjoy.net/shopping/