Went to bed so early last night that I’m wide awake so early this morning

reading heated rivalry

Me: my body dysmorphia is so bad and I feel so bloated after weeks of weird holiday party food Also me: guess I’ll finish this leftover pizza, broccoli and other high fiber veggies in the fridge for dinner tonight 🫩🫩🫩

i actually hate that benson boone pic like im physically uncomfortable

unfortunately the vibe of the new gym lockerroom is much less naked and muchhhhh less gay than my old one 😔

why it get so itty bitty after a workout 🥴

Ok there are soooo many new gym crushes at my new gym omg

Sometimes I just want to see my friends dicks… not because I’m necessarily horny but because I’m nosey lol

putting away christmas decorations at a pace that is so glacial

i don’t wanna monday i wanna be naked online with my friends instead

I always swallow

edging your wiener on the clock is a form of protest against the establishment btw

No, I will not be saying “good morning, welcome back everyone” in the teams chat before 9am.

no one on Jan 5, 2026:

this is what the first work day after the holidays feels like

wow a lot more people watched and care about the critics choice awards than I thoughts

good night 😴

It was good but Sean Penn looked like Ellen

one battle after another stresssssssed me outttt

stumbled upon the red carpet of the critics choice awards [lol] on tv rn and watching the host girl ask everyone about heated rivalry has me screeaaaaming

grwm to have the sunday scaries 😥

Just putting it out there - will suck dick for a Hilary Duff ticket at Brooklyn Paramount January 27!!

Ok officially starting this week 😤

she’s such a divaaaaaaa 👏🏼👏🏼 🖼️

feels like saturday but it’s actually the scariest sunday of the year

good morning ☀️

🎆🎆🎆

hey who wanna come over and do this all day

the waistband might be a lil too big :/

gm kinda need to suck on toes today

having suuuuch a cozy saturday now probably gonna take my pants off and play with my wiener

Sunning the bunz ☀️

lazy lego saturday

bon matin doing my morning contortions

what a time to be an american! rent is half your paycheck, groceries skyrocketing, pop stars have more spine than opposition party leaders, and the govt starts an illegal war all while the president was besties w the world’s biggest pedophile - but at least you can ask chatgpt how to feel about it!

baby’s first newly-opened, local planet fitness trip.

obsessed with haaaaaaa

gm

Wow I feel like a human again after being hungover all day yesterday

“Like she’s gonna be fine. Mandy’s from fucking Philly.” 💀💀

best friend got me lego mona for christmas and I’m so happy I could cry!

So I nutted in 2026…

new year new ru

2026 in: feet pics

kinda fierce that we’re starting off the year seeing everyone’s dicks all morning. nice job 2026

haven’t cum since last year 🤪

Hey quick question wtf day even is it