City MD gave up. Now I’m in the ER. I hope I don’t end up on one of those ‘people sticking things in their body cavity, now they’re in ER’ shows.

Wish me luck! Scratched my ear and my pinky nail broke off and traveled down the Canal. Hope they can get it out!

“the hawk tuah girl has been milkshake ducked by her memecoin” i say as the neurologist schedules me for an emergency MRI

Elon Musk really spent more for Twitter than he did for the U.S. government. What a time to be alive.

Not only has he already been acquitted, people are giving him new assignments.

"Okay, get some snaps of that Mangione character, but you better not pull any bullshit where he looks like the subject in a 16th century painting called 'Christ taken at the Garden of Gethsemane'." "Okay, now don't be mad but..."

That's abrupt. I wonder if ppl in corporate noticed a work slow down or something. Are vendors gonna get paid?

USPS will probably be called Amazon Postal at some point in the next 4 yrs

When I say 'understood', it means I want you to stop talking. But you never do.

oh shit, it's winter!

His politics are mYsTeRiOuS

I think Scott La Rock was the inverse of Afrika Bambaata.

I think Chloe is pulling a Lori Harvey with this Burna Boy business.

John Coltrane's childhood neighborhood was gentrified and is now home to Lincoln Center/Columbus Circle.

One of the few consistent principles of Donald Trump is stealing from kids with cancer.

Did y'all know 'Always and Forever' was sung by Innits?

Cardi needs to watch that Maria Callas movie.

During his presidency, a comedian showed a picture of a young Barbara Bush and said: If he did this to her in 20 years, imagine what he'd do to our country!!

Macron and his mom >>>> Elon and his mom

How did this happen?

They don't want sick people to live. Didn't you get the hint with Covid?

The ghost of Christmas future!

How ironic that Trump installed an African-American president.

Thanks, Obama!

My task rabbit canceled because he can't find parking. This is what I get for hiring a man to do woman's work!

Elon Musk: Doing to congress what he does to tesla drivers: trapping us inside and setting us on fire.

This is an album cover

<<<<< Too squishy

...I think these cleaning ladies on task rabbit are using this as cover for prostitution!

There would've been 13 movies about him beating white women.

Patron Margaritas...

Eddie Redmayne is white Michael Ealy.

You know Jonathan Majors mad he gotta be in a room with all those black people.

No one hates white people more than old black men and black women who are >>55% white.

We need Macron and his mom to stay strong!!!

Trudeau is outta here. What happened at that marlargo meeting? Looks like Trudeau didn't bend the knee.

Every businessperson who goes to marlargo is there to bend the knee and escape tariffs.

America is being run by a mob boss who is controlled by *enters tunnel*

I hate the Cephus' more than I ever hated the Smith's!!!

Sure would be nice if the president exercised his core Article II powers against an existential threat to national security while we still have time.

How many faculty were disciplined during protests demanding schools divest from S Africa over apartheid?

Its gonna be a bad look when MAGAGOP goes after Liz Cheney and Dems don't have her back.

Tap

This is how we do it

These donations disgust me. Uber and its CEO donate $1 million each to Trump's inaugural fund - www.reuters.com/world/us/ube...

A willing patsy who took out Gawker.com for Peter Thiel. Without their gonzo reportage, Trump ascended to the whitehouse. You need to understand, Gawker.com caught the mayor of Toronto (Croadie) smoking crack with the Innits and Jollofs! They were everywhere!

None of Trumps appointments mean anything or have any type of cache.

So are the gambling addiction hotline ads.