travolta is hiding copies of DIANETICS under his berets so he can give them out inconspicuously

thank god a music publication released a list of albums, how else would i know what’s good

[touches earpiece, turns head down to focus] we’ve just received word [look returns to camera] that the boys are back in town

finally signed up for a library card in my town, and you can say they’re getting a little wild in there

who would be in on a Costco Racing League. time from entrance to getting your receipt approved at exit. some factor for the number of items purchased. i’m working out the details

but doctor, i am quadrinaros

every day is jawbreaker day (and star wars day etc), but i will say this: i did not get the "fly in the disappointment" play on words until i was like, 30? real dumb guy moment for me!

steve cohen wanted the mets to be the east coast dodgers, and they have become the east coast angels (the team that just beat the mets)

You mean before their shift?

they got hoobastank playing at the IHOP

on twitter it’d start a Mets Win/Mets Lose thread every season. i left it over there. the time has passed for this season, but man, posting through what’s looking like 100 losses this year kind of gave me the itch???

thinking about CompUSA

You can’t keep doing the fake shooting angle. You’re gonna kill the territory.

mets won on bark in the park night. they gotta allow dogs at every game now

7-eleven cashier asked if i was tired.

i would love to comment on this article but i don’t know if bluesky is being Monitored yet

i wonder why this song has been popping in and out of my head for the last few weeks. www.youtube.com/watch?v=LW8I...

hello, this is my reaction upon seeing PROJECT HAIL MARY. important: i was dared by frances into getting a hot dog at the theater, and redeemed credits for it, but they were out. my voucher is good for 59 more days.

ordering a hot dog at Da Movies. will report back

Gundam x McDonald's (2026) natalie.mu/comic/news/6...

it is so great to see people discovering “that’s the wall brother” for the very first time. the childlike wonder. i envy them!

“do you want your sweaty lollipop?”

we are now playing “did the younger dog figure out her buddy is gone or is she just weird”

we said goodbye to babe today after 12 1/2 years. fran had him for about a year before i met him, and i’m very grateful to have been his cool stepdad ever since. this is my favorite picture of him from back in 2017. he was a really special guy. (don’t worry, he did get that crust)

turns out this is a prominent plot point in the film BLACKBERRY (2023)

thinking about when i nearly bought a Blackberry Storm

my friend is seeing the mario movie

MUPPET TRENT REZNOR: what have I become / my swedish friend? SWEDISH CHEF: ervie wurr ye durr gurrs awerre en de ern

guy next to me on the LIRR is just looking at rifles on his phone?

certainly didn’t expect to prominently hear a tenacious d song that the end of an F1 broadcast but here we are

Spumoni Cream Ice from Ralph’s. who gives a shit that it’s 44° out

also important: i saw danny tamberelli at a concession stand up near my seats. he looked as happy to be at opening day as i was. that was nice.

service is not great at citi field, but it’s important for me to get out that mystikal’s “danger (been so long)” was just playing between innings

Ta-Nehisi Coates did an incredible job describing Israel’s violent apartheid government as painfully similar to America’s own horrific past/present. Coates’ reward: - No more network coverage - CBS was bought by a more MAGA billionaire - The anchor defending genocide in this clip got a promotion

update: nirvanna the band the show the movie was perfect

just discovered i’ve been walking around with a fork in my jacket pocket for two business days.

some personal news:

getting optimum tv/internet ads that are entirely AI generated. this might finally be what gets me to jump to FiOS.

🚨Wait a second, don't ignore us🚨 We are dying in Gaza. We survived the bombing two days ago, and today a storm hit us, destroying our tent😭 My family is now homeless & without a tent. We implore you to donate & support us so we can buy a tent that costs €150🤲 Verified Molly shah✅ Help urls.fr/DzYN15

yesterday i was singing the growing pains theme song to the dog as i picked her up. in my mind i was expecting her to sing the harmonies? it’s been a weird few days okay

the poster’s spirit took hold of me today

for the record the captain of team italy pulling “espresso shots” from a nespresso and also using it as a brand deal for starbucks is the most italian american possible outcome. also the commentary calling it “expresso” is good. this is all fun i’m having fun

“how can you root for team italy no one on the roster is even from there” yeah and neither am i!! shut the fuck up!!!

heard you were talking shit

Dominican Republic -- dancing, hugging, whomping baseballs Italy -- chugging espresso, kissing, whomping baseballs United States -- gritting teeth, thinking about the troops, leaving runners in scoring position