people stay calling when it’s nap time for me.

I hate humidity but, I deal with it cuz I live in MD. 🙃

when in doubt, eat brussel sprouts.

Strawberry cloud matcha

I can’t stand cops Idc how nice they are.

Braces will have u storing food in ur cheeks without realizing it.

Make all tech transparent again 🗣️

there are certain places I just could never see myself working at and one of them is Dunkin’ Donuts.

Ben’s chili bowl should never have to deal with rude customers. They’re legit a staple in the community but, I’m sure they do.

Passenger princess tonight so I can turn up

Ben’s Chili Bowl

The best thing to use to scratch the palm of ur hand is the back of a remote.

At the laundromat and this guy apparently said good morning to me but, all I heard was gibberish so I walked outside. He came out and said “damn, a nigga can’t even say good morning nowadays.” I told him I ain’t even hear what he said but, hello.

Every recipe should start with: "Wash the dishes that are already in the sink because you'll need some of those."

Got a free donut from Dunkin 😊

I like getting my press on nails from temu.

There is something brutally psychically injurious to being constantly told "just do good work and you'll be successful" while watching people who do the most dogshit work possible do all the succeeding.

I have a chipotle date after work

Everyday I never wanna go to work but, ima always go.

Accurate

I can't root for everyone Black. I absolutely am not rooting for DJ Akademiks

Happiest Good Morning Mufuckas ! 🥰 Love yall, mean it. Affirmation: I feel confident handling conflict ✨

I’m gonna keep some narcan on me. I never know whose life I could save.

Just a reminder that these folks aren't your friends forreal.

On two occasions I have been told I walk like Roger. No, he walks like me. I came first.

Just pick up the FaceTime call. She could be on the other end waiting to put on a show for you.

Mmmhhmm 😋

Class action lawsuit to investigate DC cameras. classlawdc.com/2026/05/13/d...

Openly bisexual 😊

The fact that two low-budget horror films have beat out an actual Star Wars movie in the box office makes me so damn happy.

🩷💜💙 Happy Pride Month my beautiful people.

Love me a class action settlement. Hell yeah hand me my $9.53 fuck you thought.

Insecure Niggas fuck up the world.

People are not touching grass enough

I make easy money at my second job

The student rate for YouTube music was $5.99. Now it’s 8.99 smh.

Work tings

T-Pain made a whole song about doing a dance battle against a woman. He really said he bout to put the dancing paws on shawty. That song is called Freeze.

I cannot stand delivering to customers who have an unreachable phone number on top of having a pin required for their items to be delivered. How am I gonna reach you??

I legit haven’t had a day off from work.

I don’t wanna go to work 😭

I cannot stress this enough: It is SO EASY to not say racial slurs. Like ridiculously easy.

drove through a chill lil block “get together” in DC where everyone was just outside drinking, smoking, and conversing. Of course the cops were there to make sure things remain chill but, it was nice to see.

Yum 😋

NW DC is a fuck no for me. Too many ppl

Wake up

My biggest fear if I ever decide to date outside of my race is a racist family while my partner is like “idc what my family thinks.”

You know what’s masculinity to me? Using your greater strength & power in the world to be a compassionate protector of the vulnerable. The rest of the macho, you can keep it.

Guys don’t realize they like their gooch licked until it happens.