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Smokey and the Bandit is on!

Taking applications for someone to follow me around and smack me in the head when I try to buy clothing with horizontal stripes. Salary will be whatever I was going to spend on striped garments (more than you'd think)

Feeling ruthless today and my closet is going to be the victim. If I didn't wear it this past fall/winter it is going to Goodwill. Not quite ready to bring out spring/summer clothes yet, but it should go pretty smoothly when I do. I hope, anyway 🤞

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I would be happy to go to the moon and all that goes along with it, but you would not get my ass on that helicopter. Forget it, I will swim back. No thanks.

Hello, I made you a feed of your cats watching the Artemis II splashdown bsky.app/profile/did:...

Say "erected" one more timr

There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, Than are dreamt of in your philosophy.

A new word for me. I put in last letters until it took one 🤷‍♀️ Wordle 1,756 5/6* 🟨⬜⬜⬜⬜ ⬜🟨⬜🟨🟨 ⬜🟩🟩🟩⬜ 🟩🟩🟩🟩⬜ 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

I like restarting my computer before calling IT with an issue, just so I can hear them sigh after asking me if I've tried restarting it and I say yes

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The Tigers are playing so badly tonight that Fiona walked away from the TV (she is a cat who enjoys watching baseball)

I went outside for a walk this afternoon and now my sinuses are flushing themselves 😭

Tarmac, aka tarmacadam, is named after engineer John Loudon McAdam (1756-1836) of Ayr, Scotland. Macadamia nuts are named after chemist, doctor and politician John Macadam (1827–1865) of Glasgow, Scotland. It is important not to confuse the two. Dry roasted, salted tarmac makes a poor snack.

Re: yesterday's office drama: there has been half a box of ice cream bars in the freezer for two years. Someone ate them and left the empty box and the ice cream bar owner came unglued. Still no idea of the culprit (I have a good guess) but today a box of the generic 1/2

I couldn't breathe because I was laughing so hard. That bird's an asshole! 😂😂😂😂😂 Best with volume up.

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this wikipedia editor is orbiting the moon right now!

I hope I can sleep tonight 🤞

The Moon: oh wow you guys decided to come back Artemis II crew: earth’s haunted

Jeff VanderMeer is a National Treasure

Love that Corgi 🤣🐶

Cops are everywhere in Metro Detroit today. Drove from Troy to Ann Arbor and saw about 15 on 75 and 94. Be safe out there.

Slow-moving convoys have caused disruption on major roads towards Dublin as part of a nationwide protest. The convoys were organised by local activists who are protesting the rising cost of fuel caused by the ongoing war in the Middle East. jrnl.ie/7005129

Drama! In the office!

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I can't believe this is what I'm stuck doing with my one wild and precious life 😔

Back to work ☹️ Wordle 1,752 5/6* ⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜ 🟩⬜🟩🟩⬜ 🟩⬜🟩🟩🟩 🟩⬜🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

Sorry I'm late. There was an online form and I had to scroll to my birth year.

Happy Easter from mid-Michigan where it is cloudy, cold, and windy ☹️ Much like you need to wear a winter coat under your Halloween costume, you'll need a winter coat over your Easter finery, too. Carhartt should come out with a line of Easter beanies. They'd sell well.

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Our basement is flooding, and our elderly neighbor's basement is flooding, and my husband has been running back and forth with the shop vac all afternoon. My husband is a Good Guy ❤️

Oooh look at those layers. I won't be using biscuit cutters again anytime soon. Square biscuits for the win.

It's raining pretty hard this a.m. and there are a dozen Robins in the front yard, pulling up worms and gorging themselves.

As someone who gets up fairly early, yes.

The horse op-ed is an instant classic. I can't tell you how much joy this piece gives me. It should be taught in every introductory writing class in no small part because the horse arguments are so compelling. "I have noticed that human children get to eat cake. But I am bigger than the children."

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The curve ball is an optical illusion.

I am more sore today from spending 10 hours in a car yesterday than I was after our long hike and walking around Dollywood all day.

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Driving north on I-75 through Kentucky, and no rest stops. The State of Kentucky: Fuck you, pee your pants.

Time to go home ☹️😊

We have not seen any wildlife but squirrels, but we did hear what we are pretty sure was a bear grunting down the hill from the house. We are surrounded by pines and other trees so we couldn't see anything, but we stood on the deck with the binoculars until it got too dark to see.

When it is your last night of vacation and you are sick of eating dinner at restaurants.

There is a black bear statue or hunting form just a little bit into the woods behind the driveway. Every time I see it I think it's a real bear and it scares me. Gonna give it a good kick and roll it down the hill before we leave tomorrow

I see a puff of what looks like smoke and I think "that tree is on fire!" But no, it's just pollen 😬

My hat is off to anyone who lives in and drives around mountains every day. I am already thankful that we only have two trips down and one more trip up this driveway to go. I have an AWD Outback and it's in low gear to get up here. I will be glad to get back to the flatlands.