In case anyone was wondering, I'm safe too.

Fuck. Goddammit. Did I miss the rapture thing? Goddammit how many fucking times can I miss this thing FFS.

Well that was touching, Erica coming out, trying her best to shed a tear.

This isn’t a eulogy, btw. Whatever it is, it’s sickening

“When Charlie came to college campuses he turned them into bastions of conservatism” DJT - can anyone name one of these institutions? Asking for a friend

“Charlie wasn’t interested in demonizing anyone” DJT

Has there been anyone as polarizing in American history as Charlie Kirk been deified like this? Is “polarizing” even the right word?

Executive orders cannot supersede federal law or the constitution. Federal law sets visa fees, including for H-1B visas. And the maximum fee is $4,500, according to the Consolidated Appropriations Act of 2016 (Public Law 114-113). Current State Dept. site: travel.state.gov/content/trav...

Dear Americans, What the Trump administration is administering on your naive asses isn’t “cancel culture” it’s censorship. Yes, there is a difference.

Kinda looking for a new gig. Kinda bored at the crucifix shop and Mr. Cohen is like always in my shit. So yesterday I’m interviewing and this guy goes “tell me about a time you had to make a tough call to resolve a sensitive, high-stakes situation”. In my head I’m like “fuuuuuuck”

That's the best description I've read in ages.

Saw this today….

Dutch late night TV has its take

The Bureau of Labor Statistics just postponed a key inflation report with no explanation. How bad must those numbers have been for Trump to bury them like this?

Watch this wonderful statement by Colbert ⤵️ youtu.be/HMGD1KCYFOw?...

I love this,it's so true

The United States is now North Korea, only with nukes that work and grocery stores full of food, but only if you have the money to buy it.

Nazi Republicans are coming for us next

First, thanks about the all kitty qat tips. Second, said tips haven’t liberated me from La Casa del Pero. In fact, they’ve only extended my stay. Which is cool. Dog house is okay. Coz I’m not getting Mrs Pilate a fucking cat even if it means that I have to masturbate to images of Brendan Carr.

I could pound me an ice cream sandwiche right the fuck now

Okay, sorry, this freaked me out. This cat is 46 years old. F O R T Y S IX. What the actual fuck? When he’s 60 he’s going to look 90. No wonder he punked Jimmy’s ass. Jimmy’s 11 years older. This dude looks like he could be Jimmy’s grampappy FFS.

“Gas station sushi polls better in terms of trust than the legacy broadcast media” Brendan Carr FCC Czar, Potential Pedo

Question, America. Why exactly do you want the Epstein files released? Because you expect the AG to take action? Maybe the full force of your Supreme Court? You realize he can’t be prosecuted while he’s in office. He won’t be impeached, the GOP hasn’t the spine. Really, America the motivation is?

It’s over, Americans lost their freedom of speech. Chuck Schumer is in charge so it’s up to the people either take the streets or the next step is they’re gonna start taking lives.

Fuck Disney. Fuck censorship. I stand with Jimmy

The Office of the Undersecretary for Civilian Security & Human Rights is still vacant. I’m totally applying. Okay, I have no podcast experience and I didn’t participate in J6, no prior roles on Fox News… but I think my abject lack of experience should make me a shoe in for this administration 🤷🏼‍♂️

I hate the Dodgers. I hate the Phillies. Why am I watching this? Because I’m in the dog house… holy smokes: Christopher Sanchez is getting butt-fucked by Blue rn. A pair of dingers in one inning?

If Luigi Mangione has a press agent Tyler Robinson needs to contact him/her STAT

Looking forward to hearing what Powell has to say about interest rates tomorrow. Mrs Pilate is busting my balls. We were hoping the American Pope would do us some good but the crucifix business in the states sucks tbh. We may have to explore options overseas.

Mrs Pilate has been pestering me about getting a cat. I fucking hate cats. But I also fucking hate being in the dog house so…. How does one go about getting a cat? Is there like a Cats R Us in Georgetown

I told Mrs Pilate I was going to get tell my employer that I was one of many in DC who celebrated the politically sanctioned death of Osama Bin Laden. I’m pretty sure that if my employer scrubbed my FB account they’d find some inappropriate celebratory comments. Mrs. Pilate said they’d crucify me.

Is this not political violence @governor.ca.gov ? Next step is removing citizenship from dual citizens

Really? @wsj.com fuck you. This isn’t about schadenfreude you idiot fucks. Did anyone lose their jobs over the memes from the situation room when OBS got wacked? Do we need to apologize for the movie Zero Dark Thirty for capitalizing on Bin Laden’s death?

NASDAQ fires an employee because they have a zero-tolerance policy toward any commentary that condones or celebrates violence. How do they deal with the NFL? College football? Hockey? MMA? Just fuck off Nasdaq.

I promised Mrs Pilate that I’d lay off the media because I was becoming hateful but this Kirk thing? I can’t be quiet. All these ppl getting nailed, fired, disciplined for “being insensitive” about the death of a POS - WTAF does this mean? Do these companies support misogyny? Homophobia? Racism?

Does Adam Schiff ever spend any time in Cali?

Elon bends the knee. Didn’t figure him a pussy

And ppl shat on me about the whole crucification thing?

Borgata has Elon at -100

Gonna need to buy a lot more wood and spikes

Checking to see if Elon has ordered my Pontius Pilate Curifier’s Kit

Dear MAGA Christian Bible Quoting Choads

They don’t have the right to dictate my life.

🚨ATTENTION CDC AND ALLIES!🚨 We have power together. To see our strength and build community, we ask that you wear something 💚green💚 to work on WEDNESDAY to show solidarity and readiness to defend public health. Please spread the word! #courageiscontagious #wearthecolor #spreadthecolor

Sooooo… is he going to DOGE their asses? Cause I’m down for seeing some GOP asses getting DOGE’d - and spare the lubricant

Say it with me, Crucify her

Vote them out then crucify them