Happy bloons’ day @dantethek9.bsky.social

Make a band name edible 30 Seconds to Mars Candy Bars Blind Melon Slices Lemon Blondie Chocolate Cake Black Pink Lemonade Juiced Cranberries Ghost Pepper Midnight Smoke Flavor Portishead of Lettuce

Lonely people on the internet when they see an animated girl with a butt:

Went to Dollar Tree to pickup some props/crafts and some packing tape and ended up in two weird convos lol. 1-Cashier is disgruntled and told us to fill out a survey, refer to her by name and say that the company is shitty. 2-Creepy dude liked my Superman shirt and got into a tangent about ICP.

Being a Furry is an “expensive hobby for me” for different reasons than some of you. We are not the same lol

Look at me adulting with some executive function. - Got hotel booked for Sunday for Anthrocon because the 5th was no longer available for event hotels and I once again was beat within minutes of getting a Ultrasponsor or Supersponsor registration which really sucks because I like having the par…

Next time on Tezcat Puppet Theater,

For those that missed the debut here are both together. Cohesion? No. Continuity? If you think real hard and imagine really harder. Will I laugh? Maybe. Not necessarily why I want you to. But you probably did so…that’s on you folks. 😼 youtu.be/pxSAiw647y8?...

Sadly the Chemical Brothers had a falling out with Puppet Tezcat when he stopped playing electric triangle for them. So we had to make due. Also, running from an apex predator is good cardio. (New Comedy Skit)

New Studio Series Type box but 86 Studio Series Bumblebee body mold. Fuck yeah I’m grabbing this bad boy.

THIS MAN GETS IT

Absolutely agree. Unrelated, gif gives A3 vibes 😼

“How is Coors like sex while camping by the lake? Because it’s ‘fucking close to water’” Now PBR comes in like “fucking close to water while being pickled”. 😼

My next Tezcat Puppet Skit. Stay tuned.

Apex has one fundamental flaw. Charlize Therone can’t even run properly away in the right direction from a falling space ship to avoid having it crush her. (Screaming in Gay) “Run to the side you dumb bitch! Wrong way girl!”

Film you've watched more than six times with a gif. Hard mode: no Star Trek, Star Wars, LOTR, MARVEL, Disney, or Ghibli.

My partner and I just went down a long rabbit hole of conversion as the tail end of another joke and now we are both laughing to tears that ‘Let it Go’ is just about Elsa accepting she’s a lesbian and ‘Show Yourself’ is about finding her clitoris and discovering masturbation. Songs ruined now.

No one: Dandelions:

People will be like ‘Bluesky is all academics & historians’ & I’ll be like, ‘You mean the people who enthusiastically tell me the coolest shit I ever heard?????’

Holy shit this place is real and just a few hours from me.

They knew EXACTLY what they were doing lol

Fuck Greg. Whoever he was lol (It’s kinda sad this was proven to be a big hoax but funny because man could you imagine if the application posts had been real?!! So many red flags.)

Perfect campaign ad for the upcoming Midterms. 👌

Nitty Gritty Dirt Band - Fishing in the Dark Bruce Springsteen - I’m on Fire Oingo Boingo - Little Girls Sam The Sham & The Pharaohs - Lil’ Red Riding Hood

When the bard in the party decides to give inspiration but the Far Realm is leaking into the material plane and the DM is bored.

Slightly increase a band: U3

We lost Douglas Adams 25 years ago today. In his honor I give you my 14 werewolf Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy video.

𝙌𝙍𝙋 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝙖 𝙙𝙤𝙘𝙩𝙤𝙧 𝙮𝙤𝙪’𝙙 𝙩𝙧𝙪𝙨𝙩 𝙡𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙝𝙖𝙣𝙩𝙖𝙫𝙞𝙧𝙪𝙨 𝙧𝙚𝙨𝙥𝙤𝙣𝙨𝙚 𝙞𝙣𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙖𝙙 𝙤𝙛 𝙍𝙁𝙆 𝙅𝙧.

That isn’t cheese or alfredo sauce. Beware

Yes this is a double standard. But just saying lol

Current HBO straight sexual tension content vs gay content right now.

Technically it was sent to fill the pothole and, well, it is filling the pothole

The master of the “Art of the Deal”, the genius, the chosen one, the negotiator. Reality: Con man. It’s almost like…he’s just an incompetent rich asshole whose charm got him through so many gates he doesn’t realize it was never on merit or skill. And we all suffer. Half of us in US saw it long ago.

At a key critical point (Mid Q2 customer acquisition and retention strategies for the summer) the fucking orange toddler’s “exercise” in the Middle East is forcing our company to stress on the top of Tariff recovery efforts to let customers know fuel charges are about to skyrocket. So much winning.

It’s a damn shame it isn’t barracuda’s that so do this or the Heart song would take on a whole new meaning: 🎶 The real thing don't do the trick, no You better make up something quick You gonna burn, burn, burn, burn, burn it to the wick Ohh, barra-barracuda, yeah🎶

Edging porn for geological gooners. 😼

Incredible drone footage! ⚒️🧪

Didn’t see it this year and it’s too late now, but happy Mother’s Day to all The moms out there.

In other words…😼

The “bag gate” incident is a reminder of another big Furcon theft years ago. 1 - Vendors have it hard enough and bust their ass for a living. Don’t Steal. Just don’t. 2 - If you ever kidnap Tez, you’ll very quickly grow weary of his company and return him to me. So don’t waste your time and mine.

Also major kudos again to @cochayuyocreations.bsky.social for helping bring Tezcat the puppet version to life.

Just in time for…Mother’s Day? Anyways, unrelated to moms here’s the Debut of Tezcat the *puppet* magician.