[cries in ronaldo]

No player in the Premier League had more shots blocked last season than Cody Gakpo. He was not amongst the top ten for shots that actually hit the target. liverpooloffside.sbnation.com/liverpool-fc...

Mo Salah gives Egypt the lead

I would be happy if Mo won but on the other hand...

Oof. Mo. Egypt. Not great.

Hah. Though if they win they finish second rather than third almost certainly and... then it's probably Argentina. Still, be a hell of a run.

I'm worried about them running out of gas but would anyone put it past them beating Saudi Arabia? Wow.

It was one thing to see them sit deep and stonewall Spain. They’ve played today. They deserve to win, a draw is the minimum. They are fucking good and fun at the football.

What a chance, though. If he'd only passed it. Just a touch to the left.

Darwin Nuñez now is not the time for you to be good and/or competent at football.

With apologies to my second favourite manager of all time Uruguay simply must not score another goal I asked Brazil and they said if you score another goal they're not sending you any more yerba mate so think long and hard about what you do next, Uruguay.

In related news, World Cup nomenclature is confusing. Cabo Verde are Cape Verde? Ivory Coast used to be Cote d'Ivoire but now Ivory Coast is fine? But it's still CIV in the scorebug? It's Czechia and Türkiye? But it's always been Japan not Nihon? But also it's always been Ecuador never Equator?

Uruguay are very bad they are like so, so bad (also go on then Cabo Verde go and fucking take it)

Come on, Uruguay, this is one of the worst squads you've ever sent to a World Cup and you're not getting past R32 can't you just let Cabo Verde have their miracle run?

Uruguay 0-1 Cabo Verde 21' - Kevin Pina with free kick that finds the net

Funniest possible outcome is Belgium finishing fourth in a four-way tie due to disciplinary record and now I'm very invested in that happening which means it definitely won't.

The dream of a group where everyone ends up on three points and we have to resort to coin flips and the reading of entrails to determine who advances is alive and well.

Wasn't actually much contact there and the Iran player probably could have kept running and gone clear on goal so it's funny because it's Belgium but also not 100% on going down being the right move from an Iranian pov

Not gonna lie I'm here for bad things happening to this Belgium side.

Serie A clubs are broke boys, part 3,792 liverpooloffside.sbnation.com/liverpool-fc...

It would have been very funny if Spain couldn't make the breakthrough here, too, but it's Saudi so...

Fingers crossed. liverpooloffside.sbnation.com/liverpool-fc...

Côte d'Eléphants Tristes

That's harsh on Ivory Coast, thought they'd played well enough on balance to deserve the draw. Terrible defending, though, to give an attacker the time and space to receive the ball and turn in that situation.

Love seeing top level footballers fuck up as badly as I was if I woke up one morning and oh shit I'm somehow in the World Cup with a chance to win the game in the 85th minute.

This Ivory Coast goalkeeper is the opposite of confidence inspiring in the air/commanding his box and has now been bailed out a few times by the ref.

I know it felt like having two goals ruled out (one of them super questionably) really knocked them back in the first half but I expected a lot more from Germany coming out of the break.

I have no idea what is/isn't a goal/penalty at this World Cup so I'm just gonna say that Julian Nagelsmann looks exactly like the lead singer of The Killers today (I do not know what the lead singer of The Killers actually looks like)

Somebody let Bayern know Cody's price just went up €15M

It's kinda funny that Sweden and Tunisia are making a better case against a 48-country World Cup than, like, Curacao or Haiti.

Honestly don't know how to process this Gakpo performance.

eyeing you suspiciously, Mr Gakpo

Kinda damning that this is the best Gakpo’s looked in all of 2026 and it’s under Ronald Koeman.

Reminder in this game that when he’s not on strike/injured/‘injured’, Alexander Isak is one hell of a footballer. Great movement, great technical ability and, if he wasn’t playing as a left winger-come-No 10, he may well have scored a great goal by now.

Isak's actually playing pretty great dropping deeper into more of a creative role and getting the chance to run at the Dutch. Shame none of his teammates seem able to finish what he's creating for them, but still good to see.

Have Sweden considered not playing like microwaved ass?

Nice start and some actually decent progressive football from the Dutch which, now they've scored, unfortunately probably means they'll go into a defensive shell and try to nurse 1-0 the rest of the way.

The charismatic Scottish DJ may have lied about the ability of various Scottish players to score from 30 to 50 yards

Finally Scotland opening it up a little. Felt like both sides were largely content with a 1-0 Morocco win basically from the second minute.

Well that might get in the way of Scotland's attempts to anti-football their way to a result. Tough one and it was a good shot but feel like the goalkeeper needs to do better coming out and making himself big there.

My only real awareness of the USMNT over the past year was that everyone on social media who cared about them thought Pochettino was doing a pretty underwhelming job so I wasn't prepared for them to maybe be actually good?

This is honestly sad.

Canada is destroying Qatar who drew with Switzerland who destroyed Bosnia who drew with Canada Ridiculous sport to be honest

Infantino is in hell watching his home country get dogwalked

By the time you read this an improved bid has probably been made. Or rejected. Or Liverpool have moved on to a Plan B. Or maybe we've signed him. liverpooloffside.sbnation.com/liverpool-fc...

Maybe we need to start a rumour that Newcastle have put in a bid for Yan Diomande? liverpooloffside.sbnation.com/liverpool-fc...

I doubt that match is going to be amongst the best of the second round of group stage games, but now that it's over let us know your favourite from round one (Morocco vs. Brazil? Iran vs. New Zealand? Argentina...) liverpooloffside.sbnation.com/special-feat...

The groups they gifted to Mexico and Canada as co-hosts are genuinely hilariously bad (the USA's is just a regular host soft)

I'm fully aware it's a me problem but ever since they hosted the World Cup I just can't let go of the idea that South Africa should be better at football then they ever actually are.