Off-topic (or is it?), but it is now clear that we as a society have achieved a holy trinity of Julie Browns who are Very Good: Julie Brown (Earth Girls Are Easy, MTV), Downtown Julie Brown (also MTV, but differently), and Julie K. Brown (journalism, not sure about MTV bona fides)

The Super Bowl LX Halftime Show

Will this impact their publication schedule...?

More like MEH Mohnson

Macroeconomic Calvinball

Pick up? Vacuum? De-ice the basement steps? Honey, I'm protecting us from burglars and the government, get with the program.

Ironic

I would simply permanently remove them from corporeal existence.

They're laying the groundwork for, actually, it was the liberals who gave us Trump. Remember the post hoc redefinition of The "National Socialist" Party as being left-liberals after the Holocaust? And how Republicans still persist with that absolute bullshit even today?

I know I can be annoying, what with being TOO smart and TOO perfect and TOO prescient and TOO right about everything, but

Can't believe that they couldn't afford Kash Patel's whatever-she-is for their Klan rally

It’s an older sausage, but it checks out.

These people should be subjected to capital punishment with exactly the same degree of due process and same respect for the law that they have afforded to others. So, you know, start sharpening and digging.

Family reunion

Kid Rock's halftime performance was originally what happened to the guy at the end of I Have No Mouth And I Must Scream

4. The Grammy was made of solid milk chocolate 5. If you hit play on Kid Rock's "baw it da baw" or whatever the fuck it's called at the beginning of the halftime show, Kid Rock shrieking "try to love someone" syncs up exactly with me screaming at Kid Rock to shut the fuck up

lol stay mad

“Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. Turn on this fucking Super Bowl and know what it was to be awake through The Jaunt. That's relativity.”

Fun fact: The divorce scene in the Kid Rock show was an actual divorce showing a wife leaving her conservative husband.

Wow, cribbing even Presidents' posts now, pretty bold

Stephen Miller's favorite position (political AND sexual)

The halftime show ratioed the actual game

the husband stitch is when they stitch the husband's mouth shut during childbirth cause he's being an asshole

The reason you know The 'Burbs is going to be good is because Paula Pell is in it. Zero percent chance I watch it without seeing her in the trailer, one hundred percent I watch it and follow into battle now.

shit he stole pres ross's hulk serum

Pokemon Go-route

Trying anything to bring in the disaffected TPUSA crowd

Checking in across town at the Santa Clara Horny Power Plant

Getting word that Kid Rock sent up Bad Bunny by shoving an entire corn maze up his urethra

Okay, here come the deranged racists, buckle in

Why is this RAV-4 commercial set in the neighborhood from The Black Phone

Love my sports decided by scanning electron microscopes

im a doctor in the sense that my medical degree was doctored

I have never encountered a single human being who has admitted to watching Ted

🎶 CUTE CORGI CLUB

No, I'm not bitter at all about the world my generation served up on a silver platter to today's nerds, today's dweebs, today's absolute poindexters, where popular, athletic, intelligent utter smoke shows proudly, publicly play MAGIC THE FUCKING GATHERING

you can tell this is right after tasha and data fucked

Happy Dana Perino Queso Day to all who celebrate

Grifters start new grift

Where do I donate?

Why is a contributing editor to Harper's and a lecturer at Columbia Law cribbing independent journalist Marisa Kabas's posts word for word without attribution

Jeffrey Epstein, a great, great guy. Very innocent and perhaps more innocent than anyone knows. And I had nothing to do with him. But he died like a dog and nobody thought we could do it but we did. They said sir the video will cut out for a few minutes and I said wow. And we'll see what happens

Look you could write a book for a year or two that you pour your heart into and it hopefully bridges the ineffable gap of the divine between two human souls but I can write 50 books of straight dog shit in a week that people forget they read 10 seconds after finishing it so who's the asshole now?

Bollards save lives AND bring immense joy and happiness to the world. #WorldBollardAssociation

Whoa Black Betty

The rare Eric Idle/Wendy “Francine Smith” Schaal project

Heard this guy took a shit instead of sniffing her clothes and trying to track her scent