“You should have 1.5 your annual salary saved in your 401k by age 35.” Oh wow that’s so interesting did you know that the Bantu cryptid Mokele-Mbembe is rumored to be 16 to 32 feet tall and resembles long extinct sauropods ??

sorry babe the In Rainbows bed sheets stay on

My mom has seen a mountain lion near her house and is “considering feeding it.” It’s genetic.

Various figments of collapse made possible by American friends of the NGA, The American Australian Association, UIC school of art & art history and @craigneeson.bsky.social

Merry Christmas folks! On the last episode of 2025, we talk perpetual golden hours, friendships between women, and music to walk to in 2015’s TANGERINE! linktr.ee/swimfans patreon.com/swimfans

Happy holidays doves! Get tinseled the fuck up with us in the last Patreon ep of the year as we celebrate the Christmas season and talk about 1965’s A CHARLIE BROWN CHRISTMAS and 1966’s HOW THE GRINCH STOLE CHRISTMAS! linktr.ee/swimfans patreon.com/swimfans

For sale: my idiot son Édouard’s gaming chair. Some merlot and brie stains. I’ve sent him to the Foreign Legion to die in combat.

MAMMALS/TIGER5.GIF

This week on the pod, we live our mantra of Watch Recklessly and discuss a coven of ghouls, how many women you can bump into before it stops being an accident, and the joys of editing in 2013’s CRUSH! linktr.ee/swimfans patreon.com/swimfans

On a rare Jennless episode, Craig and Josh hold it down talking about Antonio’s jeans, the fine art of translation, and what happens when your fantasies are just as beautiful when they come true in 1990’s TIE ME UP! TIE ME DOWN! linktr.ee/swimfans patreon.com/swimfans

Swimfans:

i ASSURE you: ANYTHING GOES AT BATHTIME

keoghan’s childish breathlessness turns this moment of explication into something singular and horrifying

who up getting they mars volta’d

can we talk about how images like this set unrealistic body standards for cryptids or are we not ready for that conversation?

Come with us to celebrate the birthday of our Caged Lord and talk America’s love affair with the charlatan, wearing bad vibes like Dark Souls armor, and Craig’s defense of the AMV in 2012’s THE MASTER! swimfanspod.com patreon.com/swimfans

lighthouse enthusiast

My cohosts are not concerned enough about the hairless, humanoid “easter bunny” and I fear for their safety come spring.

X-Files S3,E4 “Clyde Bruckman's Final Repose” is one of the finest pieces of television I’ve ever seen. It’s a synthesis of joyous character writing & astounding acting that’s just absent in the current landscape. S2,E20: Humbug remains my favorite, but hot damn — real writers, real craft! 🤌

Grab your vestments and rosaries and come join us talking about medieval medical footage, the power of juxtaposing the infernal with the banal, and the impact of possibly the most societally relevant movie of the past half century in 1973's THE EXORCIST! linktr.ee/swimfans patreon.com/swimfans

the mothman keeps telling me that he sees a future for us but I’m like, aren’t your visions just portents of disaster ??

started messaging this grey alien on bumble (girl I know). two days in and he’s already claiming his uncle invented the lasers they mutilate cows with. lol okay big shot

This week on Swimfans: Bloodbath, we yap about folk horror, the basic human joys of music and masks, and mount an oddly passionate defense of forest cults in 1973’s THE WICKER MAN! linktr.ee/swimfans patreon.com/swimfans

Many sea stars begin life as young fairy-like creature (called a brachiolaria) that float through the open ocean. Eventually, a small star forms within them (here in yellow). The fairy-like brachiolaria sinks under the star’s weight, and the star pops out! 🎥@the_story_of_a_biologist (on Insta)

it only took me all summer and part of fall but I FINALLY FINISHED THE REVISIONS FOR THIS BOOK PITCH and i have SENT IT OFF and i am FREE please clap

shooting film 10 years ago: this yashica is neat even if it smells like tobacco. the pictures are good and it's 6 bucks to develop a roll of portra getting into film now: kodak launches new eastman stock to break the alaris strangelhold. it's $700 to import a camera, which still smells like tobacco

Tonight is What It Means to be Dove; on this Patreon episode, we talk Bigfoot, sub-Abdul tracks, and Dafoe fits in our follow-up to THE WARRIORS with 1984's STREETS OF FIRE! linktr.ee/swimfans patreon.com/swimfans

Under my administration we captured 3 gray aliens and 2 green

Big news in the very small “People Named Craig Neeson” universe today. The elusive Police Constable is a K9 handler!

🩸Bloodbath 2025 is nigh! Join us for another October of spooks and scares.🩸

This week on the pod, we open the Listener Request Ghoul Box and talk depictions of mental health crisis, Tsukamoto’s huge range of expression, and the general horrors of existing in a society in 2011’s KOTOKO! linktr.ee/swimfans patreon.com/swimfans

hell yeah dude

did someone say bi visibility because this me obscured by flowers

Switching gears, we return to our grand tradition of our annual Choose Your Own Adventure episode and look at three more movies swimming in THE MATRIX’s wake: ULTRAVIOLET (2006), AEON FLUX (2005) and BLOODRAYNE (2005)! linktr.ee/swimfans patreon.com/swimfans

This week on the show, we wrap up FULL CLIP with video editor Shannon Strucci @strucci.bsky.social discussing Cold War-era espionage, the premonition of American empire, and reading books in well-fitting jeans in 1975’s THREE DAYS OF THE CONDOR! linktr.ee/swimfans patreon.com/swimfans

i seem to be more affected by baby diegos death than i realized

Deep Blue beat Garry Kasparov in chess, but I would never let AI catch me sleeping on how we should be more concerned about the Mothman or factionalism between different species of extraterrestrials.

This week on Full Clip, we talk sheer filmic efficiency, the wisdom of keeping a gay guy in the crew, and how shooting in New York is the best special effect of all in 1979’s THE WARRIORS! linktr.ee/swimfans patreon.com/swimfans

Bugs that look like art. v2 Giant Flat-Backed Millipede (Barydesmus sp.) H.R. Giger, NYC Series VI, Torso, 1980

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Bugs that look like art. v1 American Pelecinid Wasp (Pelecinus polyturator) Torwase Dyson, Way Over There Inside Me (A Festival of Inches), installation view, Baltimore Museum of Art, 2022.

This week on the pod, we welcome back Heroes 3 @heroes3podcast.bsky.social legend Matthew Tucciarone @majorthird.bsky.social to talk Travolta and Cage, Woo’s Hollywood era, and Venice Beach Catholics in 1997’s FACE/OFF! linktr.ee/swimfans patreon.com/swimfans

Mulder: Gorgons were hideous monsters in Greek mythology. They say a single look into the eyes of a gorgon could turn a man to stone. Scully: That’s a living statue, Mulder - he’s just standing very still. Look at the spray painted suit and tophat! Mulder: Mirrors, Scully. We need mirrors.

This week on Full Clip, we’re joined by Kyle Daileda @kyledeleted.bsky.social to talk Josh’s taste in men, the novelty of a movie walking and talking like a video game, and explaining stuntwork to gay people in 2006’s CRANK! linktr.ee/swimfans patreon.com/swimfans

This week on the pod, we're once again joined by art director Carina Taylor @shecallsmecdawg.bsky.social to discuss the artful rending of garments, the rich, textured flavor of divorce, and how to reconcile a movie that's two movies in 1994's TRUE LIES! linktr.ee/swimfans patreon.com/swimfans

Mulder: They just cut that woman in half! Scully: There’s two women in those boxes, Fox. One in the top, one in the bottom. Mulder: She should be dead, Scully. But the feet are still wiggling, the head still smiling. This reminds me of - Scully: Your sister, yeah, I know.

My mom just let me know that she still really likes Empire of the Sun (1987) dir. Steven Spielberg and Great Expectations (1998) dir. Alfonso Cuarón.

Josh has become so proficient at “mime stuck in a box” that he’s trapped. Instead, Craig and Jennifer are joined by @addark.bsky.social to talk corruption in children’s television and the horrors of ice rinks. It’s the 2002 black comedy, DEATH TO SMOOCHY. linktr.ee/swimfans twitch.tv/addark