JEWEL!!!!

Tonight at the Engeman! I’ll be in the first set singing The Pretender’s tune✨ www.engemantheater.com/aconcertingr...

It's The Muppet Show with our very special guest star Kurt Cobain!

Someone gave me a plant. And here I am. Profusely apologizing to it while watering it. I am not good with plants. I am trying my best, but oh my goodness it is only time before this too shall join my great garden in the sky…. 🌱💀🪦💔

This strange woman lying in a pond is VERY excited to be distributing swords! (Or something like that… 🧜‍♀️✨🐠) • THIS WINTER - come see Amanda as The Lady of the Lake in CMPAC’s production of Spamalot! @badmarymac.bsky.social @cmperformingarts.bsky.social

Here’s a little animal crossing for you today. #animalcrossing #trumpet

Just got a pocket dial, and the person on the other end was just belting out “A Thousand Miles” by Vanessa Carlton. This is the chaos I want in my life.

Had a moment where I almost spilled coffee all over literally everything, but did NOT. Did NOT! Winning.

Idk why, but I’m feeling like it’s time to rewatch Wandavision.

HEY FRIENDS! Tune in on Friday Morning (7-8AM EST) on SiriusXM Channel 21 Little Steven’s UG to hear Kelly Ogden spin our new single- TIME WARP! @badmaryband.bsky.social Huge thanks to Kelly and Luis of The Dollyrots for playing our tune (and for being awesome!) HAPPY HALLOWEEN EVERYONE! 🎃🖤✨

You know, I was really nervous I wasn’t going to find my bat cape…. BUT I FOUND IT! BAT MARY RETURNS! SEE YOU AT BEERY’S TONIGHT! 🦇🖤✨

Thank you, @bigtakeover.com for the review of Time Warp! bigtakeover.com/recordings/b...

HEY BROOKLYN!! SEE YOU ON THURSDAY!! 💜🎉 @badmaryband.bsky.social

But it wasn’t a rock, it was a rock LOBSTER! 🦞🪨🖤✨

BAT MARY SEASON IS BACK!! #spooky #halloween #october

Happy October 1st! Ready for hoodies and soups and snuggles.

Lost a snack bar underneath the drivers seat today - it has completely disappeared into the void. I wanted a snack, and the gremlin that lives under the drivers seat also wanted a snack. Me: 0 Gremlin: 1

Nothing slaps as hard as a crispy fountain soda.

Right now! 🥳

Tonight, I went rollerblading for the first time in… SO many years. That was so much fun, and (and this part is very important) I didn’t fall down!

If you’re having a bad day, listen to Phil Collins. I don’t make the rules.

Am I listening to Genesis all day?? Why, YES I AM!

No, YOU just punched yourself in the face because you mistook your own hair for a spider in your eye. Why would you do that? …..

I would like to stay at the Pokémon Resort, please.

Today has really very big Thursday energy and it just is also very much not Thursday. Who did this?

Just found a spider crawling on my arm and didn’t have a panic attack. I call that growth.

Oh, HELLO.

SEE YOU AT BEERY’S FRIDAY!! 💜💜💜 @badmaryband.bsky.social

SEE YOU AT BEERY’S THIS FRIDAY!! 💜💜 WE’RE PLAYING TWO NEW SONGS THAT I DONT KNOW THE WORDS TO YET.

Fam, I’m still thinking about the salad I got in Super Nintendo World. Like… it was legitimately a great salad.

I’m pretty sure it’s against the law to skip Sussudio.

Kick out the jams Sweethearts and motherfuckers!

If you’re supposed to like… “find your niche” on TikTok, what does it mean when your most popular video is you trying to play songs using the buttons and the beep boop noises on your washing machine? What am I supposed to do with that?

it's actually not against the rules of hungry hungry hippos to grab marbles out of people's corrals and move them to your own hippo's corral by hand. I checked.

Can we talk about how much water I DIDN’T drink today? Because……… Oops. 🙃

You know that thing where the bugs outside at night sound a little more like autumn bugs than summer bugs? Yeah. Yeah, that.

Mashed potatoes are more butter than they are potatoes, I don’t make the rules. This is the way.

Why are Flaming Hot Cheetos so good.

Bad Mary/Kmoy collab called Sad Larry and the Skankers and yes I am the entire target audience for that joke

A fountain soda would slap so hard right now.

you heard it here first: ska is good

My bag is so heavy that it’s gotten to the point where like… there could be a whole ass bowling alley in there. I don’t even know. #MaryPoppinsBag

This is what it’s like. #editing #video #editingvideo

Mike and I just started watching the OG King of the Hill for the first time. And WOW it’s fucking great.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MIKE!!! 🥳💜✨🎉 You’re the best and I hope your day is the best!! @mikestaub.bsky.social

Maraschino cherries are just dessert olives, I don’t make the rules.

Me (39 years old): ah shit, my music interests are so dated. I gotta start listening to new music again. [proceeds to listen to Beck’s entire discography]

Forgot to use my setting spray. Today’s eyeliner is going to be an ADVENTURE.

Y’all, I have a problem. I just… I REALLY just… CANnot stop listening to The Doobie Brothers.