If I said "I can't believe my team had yet another losing season; we desperately need some personnel changes," everyone would understand that I was speaking as a loyal supporter. However, it appears that not everyone can make this intuitive leap when the topic turns to primary elections.

My mayor? A Nintendo villain. My bagels? Frozen. In the World Series? My team won't be chosen.

Ben Folds needs to release an album called “Spindle and Mutilate.”

In what researchers are calling the first true evidence for AI sentience, Hatsune Miku has refused to perform at Freedom 250.

I am disappointed in Morris Day and the Time. #SentencesINeverThoughtIWouldWrite

There's a lot of true and horrible things to say about Ken Paxton, but let's not forget: John Cornyn is a monster who actively wants children in New York or New Jersey to die in a flood because he doesn't like how those states vote. And, no, I am not making that up. Read on! (1/x)

Quote with a fictional band that is not Spinal Tap.

My opening guess on today's Phrazle puzzle was "the renal dingoes." #GoodNameForABand

Potential hot take: Prince's "Let's Go Crazy" is the best Christian Rock song ever. ("De-elevator" was a euphemism for the devil, lest the song seem too square/devil-worship-y/off-meter.)

Red, Orange, Yellow, Green, Blue, Silver.

Slightly increase a band: Chicagoland Duran Duran Duran Men on Overtime KC and JoJo and the Sunshine Band

AVERAGE WHITE MLB PLAYER: has 18 latino teammates he doesn’t speak to, believes the 2020 election was stolen and is in a group text with morgan wallen AVERAGE WHITE NBA PLAYER: wokest dude you’ve ever met, has gotten into several fistfights over a teammate being called a slur, knows every nas lyric

Not that anyone cares about my Phrazle record, but today's effort is something I've only managed once before in 1606 tries: Phrazle 347: 1/6 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩🟩 solitaired.com/phrazle

After over 50 years, I think it's time I faced up to a hard truth: Grand Funk Railroad's failure to help me party down can no longer simply be blamed upon their not having yet had the time to come to my town.

This needs to be a sci-fi short story. Working title: “Male Chauvinist Pygmalion.”

Left-wing Southern Exceptionalism is always a fingernails-on-the-chalkboard experience, but in its defense it's practically a soothing lullaby when compared with its much more common right-wing counterpart.

Film you've watched more than six times with a gif. Hard mode: no Star Trek, Star Wars, LOTR, DC, Marvel, Disney, Pixar, Spielberg, Cameron, Wachowskis, or Ghibli.

Today, I filed my federal taxes, but as a citizen of DC I face #taxationwithoutrepresentation. DC is not a state so the 700,000 people who live here have no voting representation in Congress. Will you stand with me and demand #DCstatehood now. #LetDCVote #TaxDay @dcvote.bsky.social

Okay, hear me out: a reboot of "Perfect Strangers" set at the White House, with Viktor Orban in the Balki role. Also terrible things happen to Donnie and Viktor constantly.

the thing is I do want the democrats to have solutions but I want them to have solutions for the following things: 1. the supreme court 2. ICE (and DHS more generally) 3. billionaires there's a longer list but let's start there.

Saxon's half-brothers Teuton,Volksdeutsch, Anschluss, Aryan, and Ubermensch were not available for comment.

NBC4 says (on X, alas): former DC Councilman, current long-shot mayoral candidate, and perennial local politics punchline Vincent Orange is in court, (poorly) defending his son on charges of counterfeit car tags (with $18k+ in outstanding tickets) and possession of an unregistered gun and sword.

I'm in this post*, and cool with it. (* Despite not being a woman.)

AS I ALWAYS SUSPECTED!

Unfortunately, this book is not being distributed in the US. Does anyone know where I can get a free .pdf online?

Post your favorite "Lord of the Rings" character. Wrong answers only. (What? He's not my favorite "Lord of the Rings" character, I assure you.)

I'm in the $75-$100k range (for whom this would have the most impact), and "my income tax bill is too high" is nowhere near the top of my list of complaints. It's not even at the top of my list of complaints about my income taxes! (Prefilled return, pls. Or at least bring back Direct File!)

Abracadabra

I'm not sure how to make my contempt for you any more obvious, Washington Times.

Reality TV shows about unpleasant people are to cable television programming what crabs are to crustaceans.

Got to the point in @nekoewen.bsky.social’s “Memes of the Prophets 2” where the Eitanian versions of Letterkenny’s Barts, Yorkie, Shultzy, Fisky, and Boomtown make their reappearance, and I’m once again wishing I’d been the one with the idea of basing an NPC adventuring party on them.

"Friends" is a beloved American sitcom that aired from 1994 to 2004, following six young adults—Rachel, Ross, Monica, Chandler, Joey, and Phoebe—living in New York City. The show explores their friendships, romances, careers, and personal growth over ten seasons.

Kathy Henderson has announced her campaign for mayor of DC. This is not a drill. (For those of you who do not follow local DC politics, imagine Nancy Mace as a perennial candidate for power-mad HOA president, only without the professionalism, ethical standards, and financial probity.)

RIP to the first political candidate I ever voted for. (1988 Indiana presidential primary.)

I’m proud of our common inheritance of ordered liberty and our heritage of killing Nazis when necessary.

Food is great. It Unites us as a Country of diverse tastes. Kind of a true equalizing force Isn't it neat to Come together Enjoying our memories?

For the typical Bluesky audience, Mayor (later Secretary) Pete. (In other communities it might be Traci Paige Johnson, my 10th period biology classmate and creator of Blues Clues.)

Today's Republican Party in a nutshell: it's perfectly fine to kill your daughter for not liking Donald Trump. You shouldn't even feel bad about it, especially if you have two more daughters at home anyway. ca.news.yahoo.com/woman-shot-d...

Post a banger that isn't in English, you say? So many to choose from! Let's go with... www.youtube.com/watch?v=_8U_...

Jason Myers for MVP. In your heart, you know it’s right.

A touchdown? Can they *do* that?

/2 I’m being told meth labs typically deliver and do not have on-premises seating

Watching the game from a neighborhood bar. When the ICE propaganda came on, the bar fell silent. Then someone shouted out “fuck that shit!” Applause.

I'm no Yale PhD, but I'm a heterosexual male who has both made and received recommendations for job candidates, about half of whom were women. I can honestly say I have never mentioned, asked about, or been asked about a candidate's physical appearance, and the idea is creepy as fuck.

Today's Low Quality Ad is for this "Thanks For Loving Me Even Though I'm Trash" Sticker. If you ever feel unworthy of being loved because you're trash, just remember that means your partner is a weird freak who is attracted to trash. You deserve each other. collabs.shop/vrbi3e

Never mind jobs you had, tell me classes you took at college: 1) Organization and Bureaucracy 2) Theories of International Trade and Payments 3) Political Violence and Terrorism * 4) Western Ways of Wisdom 5) Philosophy of Minds and Machines * Class was about stopping it, MAGA-heads.

If something is worse than half-assed, is it fully-assed or assless? (Question inspired by walking two blocks and comparing shoveling jobs.)

Starbuck's CEO Brian Niccol may have the longest history of extraordinary pay ratios, having made more than 1,000 times median employee at his company for 10 years (prior to Starbucks it was a Chipotle & Yum Brands). This year Nicols comp of $30.99 million. The median employee earned $17,279.

Today should have been my friend Jeff's birthday. (Fuck cancer!) In his memory, I'm sharing this thing he wrote during Trump's first term which is, sadly, still relevant today.