got full serviced by my wife last night

laura dern in jurassic park:

grimes and elon:

A thoughtful silver chonk from my collection, ca. 1970s.

me

harry i’m gonna say this delicately but you’re fat.

Lois if the show was good

oh my got…. is he stupid?

my ass is illegally fat

they killed my girl siri

good morning blueskiers look at this loaf

i’m living proof you can survive as an adult with zero life skills

can’t wait to go home and eat a delicious frozen dinner

this is how my girlfriend messaged me on tinder

there’s almost a foot height difference between me and my fiancé

need circles so i can post face and ass

when i was like 11 i tweeted that i wasn’t going to post anything for the day to pay respect to veterans on remembrance day

my fckin hole… 🥴

lowkey can’t tell who’s a swiftie…

i rlly hope my friend likes the get together we set up for his birthday like i love him i just want him to have fun it’s not fair that no one can seem to see how amazing he is….

it’s funny how me as a lesbian with a cis girlfriend is getting fucked in the ass more than some of yall #gays 😭🫡

“someone clocked the black paraplegic hijabis in a solo polyamarous relationship’s tea” me:

bruh

Got a wishbone drying on the windowsill in my kitchen Just in case I wake up and realize I’ve chosen wrong

365 farty girl shall we do a little toot shall we have a little fart

Chappell Roan stuns in new photo. 📸: Ryan Clemens

wait yall got naked men rolling around in mud?

Cows when their friends get a disease

mine baby

clogged the work toilet

have we established the state of furry porn on this app …?

give me an hour in a room with blizzy she coming out a butch lesbian

150 skeet’s and 21 followers… safe to say i flopped

that’s powerful

they can take our power but they can’t break our spirit 😇

and what about her

i think that not having drafts is beautiful… skeets are are fleeting thoughts during pure moments of inspiration that cannot be replicated outside of the very time it manifested into your mind…

girl

the way i’m either shadowbanned or unfunny

where’s that good discourse

they’re threatening to shut our power off over our late bill

up at 7:00am today….