Pure genius

Peeter Thiel is so white. Like WHITE WHITE. "Approved nuts - Anything unsalted and unfrosted." Whiter than a snowman holding a cigarette in a blizzard.

BUY GREENLAND?? WITH WHAT MONEY?! www.wsj.com/politics/nat...

I had an expense report sent back to me because I needed to include a receipt for donuts. Fuckin’ Mitch!

Aye Moody's, this you?

WOOOOOOO POPE WOOOOOOO

It’s possible the Pope knows who Ronny Woowoo is.

🎵 YOU HIGH FIVING MOTHERFUCKER! YOU HIGH FIVING MOTHERFUCKER!🎵

These 100 men would absolutely dominate the gorilla: 1985 Chicago Bears defense 1990 Detroit Pistons Derrick Thomas Christian Okoye Bo Jackson 20 Samoans Barksdale & Marlo’s gangs from The Wire 1992 Mike Tyson Brian Dennehy

Tesla Model 3 crushed by an Olmec statue By Mexican sculptor @chavismarmol.bsky.social

if Apple could make its employees undergo the severance procedure, it absolutely would without hesitation

Your outie can parallel park in less than 20 seconds.

Father Time has been whoopin his ass hard.

I don't know who needs to hear this but..

The sad thing about sheer stupidity is there is absolutely nothing you can do about it.

Local H forever

I have needed a new tape measure for a while. Didn’t know I needed one this good. Shoutout to @agoldman.bsky.social @hyperfixedpod.bsky.social

One time I was so high I couldn’t remember English muffins and all I could come up with was British bread circles. It happens.

Reflective designs can help drivers spot your body laying in the street after they run you down. theonion.com/tips-for-pic...

Righteous bucks

The only response to anyone that brings up fantasy sports.

Reddit truly is the best

Sea Anemone, by Ann Knickerbocker, 2021, 📸 via @nocontexttrack

Me poking my head in the attic and only see mounds of insulation