our children will never know a time before pizza delivery fees. something has been lost that can never be reclaimed

lol.

This is for the physical safety of people shopping online They don’t want anyone to get virtually trampled like in past Black Friday events

do the online retailers not realize that black friday is actually NEXT week

if pizza hut still gave out free pizza for reading books, we would have media literacy

wait are DMs not a thing here? noooooo

I'm fascinated that we are reaching a point where people aren't trad-pubbing because "oh, I'm not good enough for a publisher." it's that "oh, publishers aren't good enough for ME."

every day I wish it was the 2000s again and Clint Eastwood by the Gorillaz had just come out. a watershed moment

I'm in shock at how many authors know the cost of AI, know how insidious it is and what it's doing to all of our industries, and are still choosing to use it.

I think I'm cracking because I found a dead bumblebee on my front porch (tiny fluffy baby!) and it really fucked me up. it feels like a sign of the world ending in a movie.

all I have to do is see a dog happily leaning out a car window and I immediately feel happier

I am in my front yard yelling at deer to live my raspberry bushes alone. this is where I've gotten to in life

I created a new Scrivener document called "villain x villain" and the only thing written in it is "she encourages him to do more evil with the power of love" and I sorta wish that book would write itself

sometimes when I'm feeling down I think about that time Crispin Glover went on Letterman clearly on cocaine, and then made a wonderfully horrifying music video about clowns

I was always under the impression that Jesse Pinkman was actually smarter than Walter, and naturally a kind person (unlike Walter) who had gotten fucked up along the way.

props to everyone who still says "baka!" unironically

nothing I hate more in bookworld than discussions about piracy. just like, don't steal books, lmfao

me: I DEFINITELY won't forget this thing I have to do. Don't need to write it down or anything. my ADHD brain, 2 seconds later: hmm, what was I supposed to do? scroll instagram for 10 minutes?

I am a huge baby so I love having aggressive friends. ones that are like "I'm going to say the thing no one else is willing to say" and I'm cheerleading them from the sidelines, quietly

where are my fellow Vegeta appreciators on the sky app

attracted to lumberjacks while hating the idea of cutting down trees

me, forgetting to take my meds one morning: everything i touch turns to dust. my heart is a catacomb for all of my dreams. never again will i lift my pen to write, it is impossible.

waddup!!

i would really love to stop waking up at 5am. that would just be neat. i miss sleeping so much.

the collapse of twitter has taught me something really important in building a new online presence from scratch: diversification is critical. you never know when one of your mainstay platforms will just VANISH.

I wasn’t gonna say anything because posting about Twitter here is passé but I have to speak my mind on the rebrand to X. I’ll be honest and say that I genuinely like it. Why? I got kicked in the head by a horse

Someone is going to show Elon the Cool S and it's going to completely disrupt branding meetings for a year.

anyway they're doing some kind of sewage work on my street, so that's a very cool thing to deal with anytime I go outside my house!!

how did I go from over-writing massive, 100k fantasy novels to these super spare, 30-40k novellas overnight??

congratulations to my dog for finding out that she can just whimper at 6am and wake me up. this has been a massive discovery for her, and now I guess I'm a 6am person

reached that age where I go to bed early just because I'm bored

do you have any idea how confrontational i would be if i weren't also me. yall got lucky

I'm starting to see Discord servers as the future. it reminds me of the days when we all had our own AIM chatrooms and phpBB forums for select communities we were a part of. mass interaction just seems doomed to fail.

blessed. i wish this upon every billionaire

reskeet with your favorite meme you’ve ever made

i can't imagine taking a selfie anymore. it was like the day i turned 33 i stopped caring about having a photograph of me anywhere. i am simply an entity without a physical form, a brain in a jar, a Krang inside a flesh suit. i also did not sleep enough last night

These are the only blue lives that matter

I’m just gonna be real. Threads feels like you checked out a new club and just as you were preparing to thrash around to some intense goth & industrial, all eyeliner & torn fishnets, your boss, your coworkers, your exes, your mum, the church ladies, your racist cousin all showed up.

do you wonder constantly if you're being annoying so you just fall quiet to avoid potentially being annoying and then everyone wonders if you're OK

me when I see a fly or a bee: hey what's up man. just don't get close and we're cool me when I see a mosquito: DIE! DIE AND I'LL SEE YOU IN THE AFTERLIFE!!

the bisexual urge to sit with your legs underneath you at all times until they fall asleep and then you can't get up again

wishing a pox upon absolutely every person who lets off fireworks before the 4th. i will find you and place one of those skinned furby skeletons on your doorstep like it's halloween

"who's your artist crush?" fuckin GAUDI. mans was the willy wonka of architecture while still being a good person when NOBODY was a good person. a visionary and an absolute chad.

what if i just used this account to shitpost even more than i did before. 100% unhinged nonsense. it's 1pm and time for an appletini

i don't need gassing up i need a trillion dollars