💜💜💜

You guys, Kathy got her copy!!!!

Ppl who say Pattinson is the only actor who‘s had success after the Twilight franchise either has no idea who else acted in the series or has no awareness of the other actors’ film credits. If ur wondering how to respond I’d suggest admitting I’m right while scolding me for reading internet comments

Ten days until release. A little while ago we shared chapter one on the Malarkey site but it’s been a while so I’m posting it again. There’s a preorder link on that page at the top! (CW - parent death/grief/and beyond) malarkeybooks.com/free-samples...

My copy of @renbolger.bsky.social’s The Barre Incidents has shipped already! Jealous? You don’t have to be! malarkeybooks.com/store/barre-...

7 yr old: i can carry myself and I’m 60 pounds! Me: how do you carry yourself though? 7: I just…stand up

Horror fans, we are 35 orders away from breaking even on the printing costs of The Barre Incidents. We have a few signed first editions left and one of them could be yours!

Why doesn’t Snapple do TV ads anymore, did they give up

The store of signed copies is running low but there are some left. Get The Barre Incidents, signed by the author, its shipping label cut with kid scissors by the author. Amazon could never give you this. malarkeybooks.com/store/barre-...

It's not only good, it's very very good.

I always try to think of Grandpa Simpson saying “that’s the Demmy-crats for ya” to part that curtain a little when it starts to weigh me down, or Kent Brockman saying “I, for one, welcome our new insect overlords.” And sometimes it works but sometimes it doesn’t.

🎶Hear our voice unwavering 'Til our song defeats the night Making fear afraid to breathe til the dark meets the Liiiii-IIIIIIIIIIGHT🎶

I can’t imagine the stresses on these students escaping from hell, but leaving their loved ones behind. Other EU countries should be doing similar projects to help Gazans study abroad. Their entire university system has been destroyed by Israel in Gaza.

PSA: it’s ok to switch pediatricians or doctors even if they’re very nice and there’s nothing actually wrong, if you just feel like your personalities don’t mesh, and especially if you feel like you frequently leave feeling stressed out “for some reason.” They’ll be fine and you’ll be happier

happy Friday read some poems today

Cutting shipping labels to start sending out (signed!) copies of The Barre Incidents and all the other pairs of scissors have disappeared aside from this one! it is child sized and has paint on it and luckily it still cuts paper. Woooo!

Teachers that care are like the best thing about this world istg. 😭 Was looking for a silver lining and was reminded of this today

okay send @garbagesauce.bsky.social and me some deranged shit

Realized what this one scene needs is for the characters to start off being unlikable before I start to make them relatable. Trying to flex this weak-ass muscle of mine lol

Putting these bundles together this week with signed copies, Hellarkey (Malarkey’s Horror zine), and some preorder bonus stuff. Really excited to ship these out! Still another week, plus to get in on the preorder package before it ships out!

short story collection discourse you say? why not purchase a copy of the greatest collection of weird fiction ever produced: TOADSTONES (Malarkey Books '22) a work of sublime, profound genius guaranteed to increase vitality and make you more sexually attractive to prospective partners

There are only 25 signed copies left and ordering one is now the only way to get a print copy of Hellarkey vol. 4.

Haven’t watched any TV today. However, a huge spider who had made a very large web between our deck rail, siding, and gutter just got eaten by a bird. Its web got destroyed in the process.

Not that this is gonna sell books but a little hint on something coming in the preorder package with The Barre Incidents. :) No actual food in your mailbox, I promise

you know who's not controlled by right wing billionaires? malarkey books @malarkeybooks.bsky.social

A few postprandial hours left

Did exquisite corpse poems with students today—pretty fun, and created some interesting word pairs, like “beautiful walmart” (an oxymoron?), “pulchritudinous ford,” and “robust snow.” Not a bad way to make a dollar.

Who needs alcohol when you can sit on your hot-ass porch despite your family members asking you why tf you’re on the hot porch and get really sleepy from the heat

An eternal classic

It’s Latine heritage month September 15 - October 15, which means it’s a really great time to support Latine creators. I’m one, but there are many others. Look for our work. Mine can be accessed through my linktree in bio. #latineheritagemonth

25 left.

Buying our books will solve all of your problems. The more books you buy the more problems you’ll solve. Assuming, naturally, that your biggest problems revolve around not owning specific Malarkey titles.

Been watching The Outsider bc a coworker who’s a big King fan recommended it. Really good so far! Reminds me of Salem’s Lot a little bit.

If you’ve been thinking about ordering The Barre Incidents, this is the time to do it because we have only 28 signed copies left.

Got some gritty crime fiction today from @tusitalabruni.bsky.social

Overestimated how many copies we actually have available. This is actually your last chance to order a copy of Hellarkey IV. We will be sold out very soon.

Everyone else at the zoo: Oh look at that cool animal. Horror people at the zoo: fLaMiNgos’ LegS FoLd BaCkWArDs! that’s kinda creepy, right? What if you saw a giant flamingo in the dark?

Gaza City has been undergoing bombardment for the past two days as Israel demolishes remaining residential structures and forces displacement of hundreds of thousands of people.

At @littleghostsbooks.bsky.social and just picked up @johnchrostek.com ‘s new book! Let’s goooooooo!!

🎵There is a scourge in the guise of sanctity A perpetrator with a quill 🎵 Love this song :)

We add these lists on Goodreads, too! www.goodreads.com/list/show/23...

Holler, @reactorsff.bsky.social ! Both @momoshaty.bsky.social's CLAIRVIOLENCE: TALES OF TAROT & TORMENT & @hazelzorn.bsky.social's REEF MIND featured in their Can't Miss roundup. Both are def can't-miss, & both are available in our webstore: store.tenebrouspress.com reactormag.com/cant-miss-in...

It is Friday my dudes, and I am bound by fate and these lean and vicious times to promote my books without a marketing team. So please, check 'em out, which unlike fruit do not go bad on your shelf, and consider sharing this post, reviewing the books or grabbing a copy. Thanks if you do 🙏🍻

Super cool to see @renbolger.bsky.social @calebbethea.bsky.social and @thomasha.bsky.social in this list 🤘💀🤘

We are going to start shipping this out very soon. We still have some signed copies available and they come with some nice extras! Order a copy!!!

The first meme I ever saw was the “Gersberms, mah favorite berks“ meme. my husband and our friends and I laughed until we cried. Then I showed my favorite coworker who is less online and she got mad bc she thought it was making fun of German people

Disco, demons, murder 🪩🩸 Disco Murder City was just picked by Tobias Carroll on Reactor Magazine as one of the Can’t Miss Indie Press Speculative Fiction titles this fall. A must-read September release from Maudlin House. reactormag.com/cant-miss-in...

I hate Math and so do my kids and in response, Math has returned to torment us all at once and laugh about it

Heyyy The Barre Incidents (out 10/1 with @malarkeybooks.bsky.social) got mentioned here! Thought that was pretty cool! Thanks to @calebbethea.bsky.social for pointing this out whose book I have and can’t wait to read is *also* on this list. And thanks @tobiascarroll.bsky.social for the mention!!