At the end of the storm, there's a golden sky and the sweet silver song of a lark. I'm just trying to hold my head up high. Failing right now, but trying.

Can the cunts with the fireworks somewhere near Cornhill Hospital just fucking not? There is a heatwave, and all you fuckers care about is "ooh, purty lights".

Hey Labour folks, they've done this in Scotland for decades. This is why Labour will never win in Scotland again.

Thatcher. Major. Blair. Cameron. May. Johnson. Trusterbourach, Sunak, Starmer. Think Gordon Brown's the only recent one who I can't call a killer. And he sold his own country down the river.

because I know y’all can’t click and read

Gonna start, once I'm better, harassing famous people with blue sky about which crisps they prefer. I'd do cheese, but a wrong'un got there first.

People on another site are apparently unhappy that I don't like the English Plagiarist from Edinburgh. Meh. Go read some good fantasy. I can happily write a thread of 20 books.

The UK/USA Food war is getting monotonous, so here's a hot take from someone you wouldn't expect to have it- Nigerian Jollof Rice is better than Ghanaian Jollof Rice. I've had both, made by people from both countries, but I prefer Nigerian. There, I said it.

Celtic manager achieves aim of winning cup, Dunfermline manager achieves aim of upsetting Rangers fans

New neighbors #Cat #Caturday

I managed to get the vegan meatballs down my neck, and some decent sponge and custard. So yay, I guess... Sorry folks, I can't motivate at all today.

I'd love to be happy that my team won a double today. But right now, I'm struggling to be happy full stop. But, I guess that's why I'm here in a ward, getting the help. Thank god for the NHS.

I'm in the wrong country, but I have plenty of American friends on here. So, Bump.

Hey #TheIndependent, stop it. Get some help. If I want ableist or transphobic bullshit, I'll go read The Guardian.

Ahh, Alan Milburn. I wondered if I'd see his face again. This is the man who brought in sanctions, Work Capability Assessments and worst of all, a digital system that didn't work then, and still doesn't now. Don't believe his bullshit claim to the BBC.

1. London Underground station flooding has reportedly been reduced by around 90% thanks to a group of engineers: beavers. After conservationists reintroduced a family of beavers into a nearby city park, the animals built dams and restored wetlands that now absorb and slow floodwater naturally.

Well, it's Day 5 of lord-knows-how-many-days on the ward, and so far, this is my first caffeinated coffee, as yours truly has been allowed two caffeinated coffees a day from today. How's your day going?

Goodnight, BlueSky.

X Men First Class. The BEST X-Men movie.

For those who care far too much about TV ratings for wrestling- listen closely. Every decade, the NBA has a player who becomes considered the GOAT of his era. We are in the start of a new one, who, if he goes through his career like this, will be the next Jordan. Seriously. Stop worrying.

Abolish the Monarchy.

The law locks up the man or woman Who steals the goose from off the common But leaves the greater villain loose Who steals the common from the goose. The law demands that we atone When we take things we do not own But leaves the lords and ladies fine Who take things that are yours and mine

Well... I guess even a stopped clock is right twice a day. Jeremy Clarkson apparently has turned down a knighthood because he doesn't think any god-fearing Yorkshireman should accept one. I'd agree, but for a reason- I don't think the monarchy should exist. Monarchs belong in fairy tales, not life.

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Oh look, something worse than pineapple on pizza. 🤢🤢

Now THAT'S good news.

That's me sorted out the ward's common room telly, time for #TheChase.

This Maki Itoh highlight reel from her last appearance in AEW is currently going viral with over 10+ mil views on AEW's official TikTok page. We need her back in AEW asap now that she's a part of Stardom! #AEW

It's an older #AEW reference, admittedly, but it checks out

There’s a rogue “O” in the book title

If you ever need extra parts or just some inspiration, check us out on Bricklink. We have a huge selection, great prices, and fast shipping. store.bricklink.com/Bricculus?si...

The wife told me to stop singing "I'm a believer" or she'd leave me. At first, I confess, I was under the impression that she was joking. But then I saw her face...

A möbius strip was crying as it entered the pub. The barman says "What's wrong?" The strip replies "where do I even begin?"

No compliance. Ever. Our trans siblings, we will fight for you.

Best Fesshole reply ever 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Lady in purple, "I'm not a big fan of: we had one vote" "When we had the Brexit referendum the entirety of Scotland was in agreement to stay in the EU" "And it didn't mean a thing (as Scotland was pulled out of the EU by Westminster)"

Well, it's Friday, I'm still here in the ward, and there's a few things I'd like to tell you. Should you find yourself here, there's a few things to bear in mind. Firstly, kiss privacy goodbye. The only time I get any is behind a curtain when I'm in bed. The truly, and horribly uncomfortable bed.

this is the most millennial dad joke ever conceived

Dad joke of the day already sorted…

Psyduck having a peaceful day #pkmnart

LAUGHABLE front page from The Express… A newspaper that backs Reform whose leader and MPs voted against laws on: Stalking Harassment Drink spiking Upskirting …and sharing intimate images without consent. A pathetic excuse of a newspaper.

Stuart Machin, on a salary of £7.1 million pa, complains that he might not be able to sell a loaf of bread for over £1.50. Qu'ils mangent de la brioche?

🐝♥️♥️

#MagnetoWasRight.

Fuck. You. Your lot are making life so much worse for people.

The hostility towards neurodivergent people and those with mental health conditions by this government is a disaster waiting to happen, and the press are desperate for it

such a perfectly beautiful ending for stephen colbert #lateshow 🥹

Man goes to doctor, claiming life isn't funny anymore. Nothing seems great, life isn't worth it. Doc goes "The circus is in town, they have a clown called Pagliacci. Go see him, he'll help." Man breaks down further. "But Doc.... I AM Pagliacci".