Ran across this burn today. “He’s filed for bankruptcy more times than he’s had consensual sex.” Yeah, you know who.

Why am I?

In my 70+ years on the internet I’ve never seen anyone lie.

#mildlyinteresting overhead water leak at Walmart.

When you go to dictate a reminder, but your brain is cottage cheese.

No, I’m not A.I. to the best of my knowledge. However I’m told the previous skeets are the current flavor of A.I. writing. So maybe I just helped feed the machine…

No fluff. Just shouting into the void here. This is not a rant. It is a reflection. Not a complaint, but an observation. Not chaos. Clarity. Short sentences. Fragmented thoughts. Pauses for weight. You feel it.

I can’t decide between being pissed off at the arrogance or grumbly that at least they USE the blinker.

Leeroy. Jenkins. youtu.be/AuGx_rzCUxg?...

Have they come out with Eurobeat country music yet? What about New Age thrash?

Me - “What’s wrong with me?” @damarmar.bsky.social “honey i have to work tomorrow so I don’t have time to go over that list.”

This is true. It is the best email I got this year.

No email from a library system stirs the imagination like a notice my scan is ready to download through WORLDCAT. The great cat that surrounds the world? That nuzzles the roots of the world-scratching-tree? The great world cat who is and was and shall be? That cat???

I just learned the Bugs Bunny No meme doesn't even come from him saying no. It's a frame rotated 90 degrees from him taking a drink from a bottle. I needed to share this.

What A Weird Country We Live In

why would you run ethernet cable through a mains breaker box?

“Make salute.”

Ladies and gentlemen... the weekend. (also: you are important and are not alone 🧡)

@dmdash71.bsky.social i like this guy, he funny like you :) #chrisboden youtube.com/shorts/3wrV0...

But why updog?

I need a third hand so I can drop things more effectively.

OMG

“window cheese”

I cannot recall the day when curbs and I became officially certified as mortal enemies. It was most likely before I became legally authorized to operate a motor vehicle. Nevertheless, suffice it to say that me and curbs have a ~history~.

My incredibly long "Would there be a furry plot episode?" Thread

6-7 again for the sociological win 🧪 “The teacher says ‘do problems 6 and 7,’ and boom—a shared moment. Laughter. A known way of moving your hands. It's nonsense that makes sense socially. Because for ten seconds, you belong.” *culture* [Becky Kennedy’s post on LI]

Do not, under any circumstances whatsoever, wear a pizza as a hat.

I stopped the world and melted with you in point of fact everyone melted with someone or something except those thrown into space

This should be headline news - the implications are horrifying …

“with lots of ice…”

please let this particular bit of history somehow repeat itself but with the currently reigning U.S. administration in attendance that'd be great en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Erfurt_...

Keep blurting stream of consciousness thoughts out loud and then apologizing that I forgot to use my ‘inside voice’ aka inside my head.

Today I was mildly inconvenienced which as we all know is the worst possible offense towards a white person.

This is one of my favorite paintings, from any painter, ever. Not only is she crushing Mein Kampf, but the arc of her rivet gun's cable also evokes a serpent being crushed under her heel - even while the rivet gun herself is laid on her apron like Christ on the lap of the Virgin Mary.

getting iced coffee when out of nowhow the thought struck "wouldn't it be cool if there were molds to make ice cubes in the shapes of the element keys from the Fifth Element?" and it is and there are.

also be me question myself why am i 4chan greentexting i don't 4chan i see shitpost screenshots sometimes tho but still why

check on my battery pack charging says 100% unplug it nothing else plugged in drawing power display switches to 99% wtf lying liar lies

sliced cheese on bread: the quintessential 2am snack

this only makes me think of our current administration.

Feeling a little nicer towards them now lol

I think about this constantly

there's probly someone here who needs to read this

If you see this, quote with a robot who isn't from Star Wars, Star Trek, Dr. Who or Transformers.

"God wasted a perfectly good asshole when he put teeth in your mouth." i wish i had thought of that one. Sure won't remember it when a moment comes along where it would be appropriate. #rareinsults