I am an endless source of amusement to myself

Ollie just told me to “take myself down to the Autism District”

Oomf compared me to a movie character who the. proceeded to be extremely grumpy, rude, and referred to by another character as ”a wet sandwich”….. big wake up call

Time to bring back my favorite show, “Autism In Action”

Nothing more terrifying than when I can’t find one specific note in the notebook that I keep all of my important notes and lists loosely tossed in

Oomcws just signed off the call by saying “opulence is drug!!” and immediately hanging up

nobody has it like they have it

Whatever I’m doing must be the opposite of manifesting

you guys don’t understand how much energy I have to funnel in to “having patience” once I’ve gotten someone a gift

Post office rush hour is apparently 2:49pm on Mondays

I’m in prison (I have to sign for a VIPackage but I don’t know what time it is arriving)

@rockfactory.bsky.social when he has to explain global politics to me for the 2,476th time in one week

Chekhov’s Vegetable

Trying to marry the deer and the bat versions of myself into a consistent personal style is a real challenge and I only trust a select few to take it on

Me: I’m not a character I’m a real person! Ollie: aw, baby!! That’s not true!

The only known footage of one of my most awesome outfits ever is being held hostage by qdp

Reckless Leg Syndrome

Ollie said he’s “never been so attracted to me” as today because I didn’t do any chores

just returned from “vible study”

{{At least I think I do}}

post-caffeine apology tour

Happy hour was a hit of course

the birdbrain barrier

Can’t wait for happy hour

Thinking of the Roman Empire once a day does nothing but fuel delusion. Thinking of the life cycle of the Salmon once a day is humbling and profound

Everyone should be more obsessed with the life cycle of the salmon

🍅🍅🍅(complimentary)

Zoomf can really whip up some cookies

Love when the last page of a book gets me to shed a tear that I didn’t see coming

he then dared to discover the answer to “can sticking my thumb directly into my partner’s skinned knee be foreplay”

Unique yew Nork

Whoever lays out the Kroger should be put to death

I need a name for the specific type of labor involved in determining whether a recipe website is ai or not

Some days are all about eating 100 treats

All ailments must come in threes

Good gracious, ass bodacious One of the best lyrics of all time

Sometimes I look up a word and the definition is so unhelpful that I just come away with “noun”

I need to invent a bike towing system where I can transport a second bike while riding my bike

I’ve just about had it with “parking lots”

Apparently I started biking one year ago !!!

It’s rat freaking summer and if you’re not on board you’re not a fucking rat ok!

Maybe if I buy an inordinate amount of sports bras I will manifest my top surgery

Getting back in my Paul Thek bag

Committed the cardinal sin of ordering pants in a size medium

My mom asking about my pronouns immediately Before I get launched into a gravel ditch is kinda awesome

I say the darndest things

Sharon come get your damn rose

Attempting to describe the fall, my mom just accidentally invented my new favorite word: “autismal”

Holy shit lmfao