like clockwork 🥴

note to self: in horary astrology, 2H lord in the 9H more than likely means that your lost item is in the car 🥴😅

“ancient chaotic romance’s” post saturn return sister playlist is “loving you has been a religious experience”

back on my bullshit again 😔 (i’m gonna be the king of the pirates 🤪)

one of my coworkers was joking with me about my ocd + how i wouldn’t have survived being a child in the 80’s/90’s drinking hose water, like ma’am, not only did I drink hose water as a child, but i was ALSO snorting cocaine off the back of PUBLIC toilet seats like 10yrs ago 🥴😂

2016 me: what’s wrong with ME that he refuses to show me kindness, gentleness, and romance ? 2026 me: what tf is wrong with HIM that he refuses to show me kindness, gentleness, and romance ?

i’m feel like i’m the haymitch abernathy of attempting to break generational curses, hopefully one of my descendants will be smarter or luckier than me.

the meanest thing someone could ever do is use something you said in confidence to them as ammunition when they’re upset with you.

being in a relationship with someone who i’m pretty sure is a borderline is very exhausting when they do their monthly splitting episode and oscillate between tolerating and devaluing you.

when you dream a dream and get no payoff at the end. 😤😤

“i dial drunk, i’ll die a drunk, i’d die for you.”

saturn in aries will reward audacity. the loudest, most bold person in the room, and not exactly the most prepared. so just do it. post the damn video, reel, etc. there's someone out there less qualified doing better bc of their audacity.

putting 52 pimple patches on my face and praying REALLY hard 🙏🏻😭

i should honestly journal all of the mean thoughts and resentment i have in my heart before it drives me insane.

sometimes i have the weirdest projections put on me and all i’m doing is chilling and vibing ???

someone just insinuated that i was a racist, but they also shit on the fact that i’m “too woke left” make it make sense ??

psych is just blue’s clues for adults

treating my adhd with a multivitamin and “allotted headphone time” because i’m not allowed to be prescribed anything i could abuse bc i used to be a drug addict 🙂

when my boyfriend makes me mad, i like to let clumps of my hair wash down the shower drain, so he has to snake them out later. but he’s out of town and the water is going down slow so guess who has to reap what they sow 🤡🥲

One of the many reasons AI can't produce good writing is it can't hate its own writing. It can't think to itself "Maybe I'm illiterate" during the writing process. And that's essential

the trans-siberian orchestra is just ghost, the band, but for christmas.

nobody: not a single soul: my man: “i love when the brainrot hits so good in the morning”

sometimes i genuinely cry because who would i be without my son ? like, the best gift in the whole world that changed the trajectory of my life forever and it was because i impulsively got pregnant with 0 days of sobriety, bad depression, and an eating disorder 😭😭

my weird witch power is telling bereaved parents that i hope they get their rainbow baby soon…and they do.

writing a psychoanalysis on my boyfriend in my notes app and high regard by the story so far comes on and all of a sudden i’m like:

supernatural is just wild kratts for adults.

end game by taylor swift, but your partner has an aries sun + mercury in the 10H (ruled by a 12H gemini mars) and you have a 10 virgo chiron (ruled by a 12H scorpio mercury) 🥴

cinema sins but the tally is how many times i wash my hands whilst trying to perform the most basic of tasks (hint: it’s at least more than 3)

like Cassandra, we are often doomed to be ignored and ridiculed bc we can see something which takes so much time and effort and deep knowledge that to the uninitiated you seem mad, foolish, or dim; tragically, this also includes one another, as we are all partially blinded by the prism we witness

*didn’t eat all day. didn’t drink water. probably overstimulated. tired.* “ah, yes, this must be from mold poisoning”

actual conversation with my 6yo today: “yes, jesus did die and got to respawn like in minecraft, but that’s because his dad is God. you still can’t respawn once you die in real life, just so we’re clear.”

I genuinely feel like I know too much, all the time

jeremy allen white would make a great popeye the sailor man

nobody: my child:

Happy Saturn cazimi

babe please i promise i’ll be so normal if we listen to nahko and medicine for the people together 😭😭

It’s Mercury day with the Moon in Gemini, this one is for the yappers

i’m gonna get one of those shirts that say “i can fix him” with my man’s face in the heart ♥️😂

i’ve been thinking a lot about the sign that rules our moon and how that might give an idea of what we seek in order to feel emotionally fulfilled

imagine being bob casey and your biggest opp is my 6yo for some reason

rip chef julian slowik, you would have loved 13 reasons why

mr beast and his boys would literally thrive if they worked at a jimmy johns

Good afternoon

i think spending so much time by myself is making me kinda weird and is going to give me early onset dementia

astrology is so interesting bc my last 6H/7H profection years i was homebound bc I was in cyber school and this time around, i’m homebound again. both house rulers are in the 12H

being a parent is a tough job bc what do you mean my child called his dad “king of the bitches” (derogatory) and i couldn’t laugh 🥴😭😭

PITCH: An updated version of the curse of Cassandra where she's describing things that are happening now, in front of everyone, but still isn't believed.

using my parenting powers for evil by doing little activities with my child to test and strengthen his psychic abilities

OUT THE BACK DOOR, GODDAMN BUT LOVE HER ANYWAY !! 👊🏻😤♥️