Greg
@growlygrego.bsky.social
📤 6791
📥 247
📝 196
barbed wire won’t stop the wind
pinned post!
GVD (Gently Vomiting Duck) says hello
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over 1 year ago
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iPhone: Software update 67.594.7 is available. It will install later tonight when the device is charged and connected to WiFi Me (the next morning): you didn’t do it iPhone: I KNOW RIGHT Me: why? iPhone: Me: iPhone: I’ll do it tonight, I promise
about 12 hours ago
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68 has the worst imaginable Middle Child Syndrome
25 days ago
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In the Old West, there were only 2 options for helping a loved one get sober.
28 days ago
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reposted by
Greg
Ygrene
about 2 months ago
[God creating dogs] Oh these turned out great. Im going to want all of these back at some point
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Who let Joey Chestnut on the Board of Directors at WHOOP?
about 2 months ago
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Just when I try to stop snack, they come out with even more snack, better snack
about 2 months ago
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*makes millions* *buys Nissan Juke* *drives it into the ocean* *walks back to dealership* *buys Nissan Juke* *drives it into the ocean* *wal
about 2 months ago
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I just want to be wealthy enough to have a loggia. Don’t care whether it is attached to a house or attached to a Robert.
3 months ago
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You’re hired
3 months ago
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SKATEPARK: Yay, $1.8 million in donations to build me! PRINCIPAL: You know what…fuck this shit, I quit.
3 months ago
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3 months ago
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It’s a bag of chips, not my aunt carol’s goddamned recipe blog intro
4 months ago
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All I want for Christmas is $2,800 and for Willie Nelson to sing “C is for Cookie” from Sesame Street.
4 months ago
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She’s a perfect fit for the job but I can’t do anything about it.
4 months ago
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The idea of broth seeping lazily and unchecked through the farmland has sent me into deep hypnosis
5 months ago
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It is supposed to be our special night. A grand romantic gesture. It takes me over an hour to light all the candles. My god there are so many. It is now 300 degrees in your bedroom. My desperate attempts to keep wax off your dresser further kill the mood. Love has left your eyes.
5 months ago
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I came here to do two things: Learn how to count.
5 months ago
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What if, as a hilarious joke, I was able to sleep until my alarm went off
5 months ago
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I still play Words With Friends (not ashamed) and hoooo boy do I get the feeling that the overwhelming majority of my opponents have highly problematic, uh, worldviews quite different from my own. Wild.
5 months ago
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If the gates really are pearly you gotta worry about the other design choices within.
5 months ago
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One cool thing that happened we were watching Portlandia the other day and discovered that we stayed in a cool Airbnb where they shot some scenes
5 months ago
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real talk does this spider have 9 legs or do i not understand how numbers work ?
5 months ago
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mathematician confronting their nemesis
5 months ago
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proud to be Texas Sober (I only eat guns)
5 months ago
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Townes Van Zandt just made an appearance in my daughter’s Spotify DJ playlist and I’ve never known joy like this, it proves I did an minimum of 1 (one) parenting correct.
5 months ago
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¿Y Tú Mama TAMBIÉN? ¿En esta economía??
5 months ago
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New on Netflix UNTOLD: I Can’t Stop Eating Ginger Snaps (The Rise and Fall of GrowlyGrego)
5 months ago
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reposted by
Greg
cacio E pepe? in questa economia?
over 2 years ago
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reposted by
Greg
sky
over 2 years ago
I have never in my life learned from another person’s mistakes, I would literally let a giant wooden horse into my house right this second.
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I beg to differ, madam
6 months ago
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reposted by
Greg
BayBayFriend
almost 2 years ago
in terms of words with disappointing definitions, dogmatic has got to be up there
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reposted by
Greg
Viktor Winetrout
6 months ago
Nice empire of dirt, dude. It would be a shame if I could have it all
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Today’s sign the apocalypse is upon us : When goddamned LinkedIn sends a goddamned notification that 5 goddamned tertiary business acquaintances have played mini goddamned sudoku, we did this to ourselves
6 months ago
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Disagree
6 months ago
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I don’t want to business anymore
6 months ago
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Which park, are y’all playing basketball?
6 months ago
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It really did
6 months ago
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Do y’all remember that tweet: “If you like piña coladas / getting caught in the rain / Drink this piña colada / it was caught in the rain” I forget who wrote it but it continues to ruin me
6 months ago
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Me and my three hot friends hitting the town
6 months ago
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did y’all see internet it’s very funny
6 months ago
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iykyk
7 months ago
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Normalize diagnosis of violent stomach flu as “a little bit of spit up.” Or don’t. The stakes have never been lower for this issue. I’ll circle back in Q4.
7 months ago
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If Topo Chico turns out to be really bad for you, I am big trouble. Big.
7 months ago
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Oh Thank Fuck for 7-11
7 months ago
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THINGS I LOVE (Friday morning edition) 1. A nice cold cantaloupe 2. Using paper towels (I know I’m going to hell for this one but honestly the bigger sin would be denying the pure joy it brings)
8 months ago
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ME: [not bothering anyone] HBO MAX:
8 months ago
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Morning Brew email asking the question we’ve all been wondering about for decades
8 months ago
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[Sexily] I will descale your keurig
8 months ago
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[Little Debbie, sweaty, knife to my throat]
8 months ago
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*takes an irresponsibly long chug of my drinkable yogurt during a Zoom meeting that I called* [out of breath] guys you have GOT to get your Q3 sales numbers up this is bullshit
9 months ago
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