Getting a “wyd” at 1:30 on a Thursday afternoon is crazy.

All these tweets and skeets about how insane 9” is have me feeling like the king of the world 🤴🏾

Also here’s to hoping more mm romance books make it to the screen and they produce the “Sadenverse” too 🤞🏾

Just starting Heated Rivalry. I wonder if they’ll make a series from the other books in the series.

Spending the last 12 months in marathon training mode has made me a lightweight 😩

It’s been a minute since I’ve had a shower beer but I just had a shower soju and BITCH… I wish I would’ve done that Saturday night instead

Like ain’t shit out there keep your ass in the water

If I could time travel I would kick this bitch back in the water

never seen any of you irl

What’s y’all’s favorite Thanksgiving clapbacks? 🦃👏🏾 I need to be prepared cause my lil Gen Z cousins got jokes and they really be eating me up 😩

A coworker just described Friendsgiving as “Thanksgiving but with food you actually wanna eat”…? Thank God I’ll never know what it’s like being from a family who can’t cook

Now why did I have a dream I ordered lean at a bar? 😭

Count your days, Quan Millz. What the hell is this 😭

Quote with your very first Bluesky post

Ran a turkey trot half marathon yesterday morning and hit a massive PR for the second time this week! #FitnessSky #RunnersOfBluesky #HalfMarathon

My boss just said his 4 and a half month old is 18lbs and 31”. THIRTY-ONE INCHES. Hoe that’s over two and a half feet. My sister said “is your boss a man?” 😂😂😂

My boss is redoing company emails and asked if I wanted my MPH in my signature…

Oh yeah I traveled to the DR and ran my first marathon almost a month ago that I’d been training for since December 🏅🇩🇴

Accidentally ordered an iced chai and it’s 42° out 🥶

I was at a bar with some friends last night but I wanted food from a different bar so I drunk sprinted there and set the course record on Strava that I’ve been meaning to steal for a while.

Got invited to a Friendsgiving potluck and I think everyone in attendance is Black, Asian, or Latino so the pressure is on 🥲

Posted this on my ig story and now I have orders 🙌🏾 time to learn how to sew in a satin lining

Literally think about all the stuff I’m gonna knit for Christmas gifts for family then by the time I get off work and shower I have almost no drive 😭

This is the most embarrassing, petty, and divisive presidential administration in the history of this country

Went out last night with some friends and accidentally left a candle burning in my bathroom and my iron plugged in THE LORD IS LOOKING OUT FOR ME 🙌🏾

32 years old today and I feel better than I have in the past decade! Grateful to see another year 🥳

Just saw a video of a female cat cheating on her husband with a male horse then coming home as he’s leaving to go cheat on her with a male gorilla. Then while he’s cheating at a motel, he sees on his ring camera the horse bringing roses to his wife, drives back home with his gorillover, crashes out,

These Amazon deals kinda suck

Should I get my friend to write me a doctors note saying I can’t come to work because I have Ebola?

Me rn cause I just shaved for the first time in idk how many months

Remember last Halloween when that guy dressed like a sims and pissed a bunch of people off just for being hot? I’m tryna be that level of hot this Halloween but Idk what to be.

I love how all gospel songs are just like “yeah life is tough but one day it won’t be…when I die” LMAOOOOOOO

Was scrolling ig and thought this was serious for a second 😭 I was like not @kevonstage.bsky.social 🤣

Getting the hang of this circular knitting machine. Christmas gifts are gonna be so much cheaper this year

Mildly thirst trapping on close friends

I need to start back crocheting again. Got blankets and beanies to make before it gets cold

I just paid $18 for a vodka + Red Bull and somebody bumped me and it almost spilled

I start my month of no alcohol this Friday in preparation for my first marathon. Imma look like a Greek god by race day.

White boy at work just asked me what my opinion on “the Charlie Kirk situation” is and I said “who is that? I keep hearing his name” and he was flabbergasted.

Me when I get in my car to leave work every day

My stomach has been messed up all morning yet here I am having a milkshake for lunch ☠️

Having some 8 am airport beers and a marg before my flight and with the last beer I bought a birthday girl headed to DR 🇩🇴 a tequila shot and I drank the beer in the same amount of time it took her to take the shot. Expecting an intervention from my friends when I get back but I’m also impressed.

I’m loving the “false fall” mornings then Georgia summer afternoons.

Pumpkin spice creamer in my coffee this morning. It’s a good day 😌

It upsets me when people say “how do you not like tomatoes but eat ketchup?” as if they taste the same.

Day 2 of me getting to work on time and my boss being late. What’s going on?

Auto reply: Thank you for your email. I will be out of office and will be able to respond upon my return on 17 Jan 2028. Good luck!

Just thought about the fact I’ll be 40 in a little over 8 years and that just doesn’t seem right.

One thing about runners, we’re gonna stroke our own c*cks.

Yesterday I got up at 5am, started running at 5:30, finished 20 miles before 10am, went shopping with some friends, took a 15 minute nap, went over to a friends for dinner and pregame, went to a bar, and got home at 2am. I’m built different I guess.