made the mistake of spending >2 minutes on linkedin looking at jobs and posts and now i'm thinking i should explore opportunities like "selling everything and moving to the woods" and "never touching a computer again"

standing outside shouting "a breakfast burrito is a hot dog but not a sandwich" until someone puts me out of my misery

didn't get the job btw. time 2 spiral

controversial opinion: the uk series Taskmaster, and thus the dropout series Gamechanger, only exist because of die hard with a vengeance

josh brolin hits back! like the story is diane lane

in the awful post-interview, pre-finding-out space, where i know there isn't any news yet but i want news and i want it to be good and i want it now

cat decided 4am the night before i have an interview was the Right Time to push a glass off a high place and cover the floor of our study in shards

a nice thing about doing a parks and rec rewatch is when you get to the "this isn't fun anymore" inflection point (the first and every time billy eichner is doing his shrill screaming shtick as a recurring character) congrats! you've finished the enjoyable parts of the show. downhill from here.

yes. correct

the bears are simply representing their constituency accurately: people who live an hour outside of chicago who say they're from chicago

on a work meeting our marketing people were VERY excited to share their new project: they took a bunch of peoples' employee headshots and used it to make a gestalt employee for use in ai videos! it's horrifying! marketing tulpa needs to die.

man was not meant to spend the moments before he falls asleep agonizing over the day he was meant to have thoughts like "i wonder if i have it in me to write a canadian crime caper novel about charming rogue 'tabernac bon-nuit' " and never return to them

horror movies should be about inflicting trauma not processing it send tweet

i just heard a cover of smashing pumpkins' "tonight tonight" on the radio that was so bad my first thought was "maybe life isn't worth living"

here's my proposal: you can talk to the media about who you're going to vote for, OR you can cast a vote. if you talk to the media about your vote you give up the franchise for 4 years. one weird trick that would either make these articles dry up tomorrow, make the country a better place, or both.

equally likely that this guy made that font choice for his business cards because of Avatar, and that he made that choice long before Avatar

i was wondering why our db has been so goddamn dogshit slow this week to return results, and the answer was delivered to me by a random totally-non-technical person complaining that the code they asked claude to write for them was "going slow" this shit needs to stop

madison is the first college town i've ever lived in that has, at its absolute zenith, pizza i would rate 3/5 on a good day

yoda and grogu's awful little species has to be proficient with The Force because otherwise they would be ripped apart by anything the size/aggression of a house cat. and we'd cheer for it.

dead by daylight adding jason voorhees when i'm having a like top 5 all-time Shitty Week over here is basically the only thing that could get me to reinstall that game again, and even then, i'm wavering

the worst part of the whole baking process is the time between when it goes into the oven, and when i can eat it. no fun creation time, no even more fun eating. just hoping something doesn't burn.

it's funny when a bunch of sites get marginally shittier to use one day and i think, hm maybe i need to restart my router? and no, it turns out they all added some new intrusive script that i'm default-blocking, and whose absence is causing their whole shit to freak out. always vindicated.

recent health Ws: successfully stopped drinking pop or "soda" recent health Ls: getting really into gas station donuts. some real innovations are occurring in the space.

specifically, i am trying to get iowa to release a death certificate to me, so i can send it to montana to establish i'm one of two living people in that side of my family total, and iowa refuses to acknowledge montana's need is Sufficient for this. hate both states more every minute

i've spent the afternoon trying to run down someone on the phone for two different errands and i can feel myself being bent by degrees towards The Full Ted K due to the volume of automated menus, cancellations mid-wait, and contradictory steps involved with both tasks

love when cooking instructions are like "375-400 for 12-15 minutes" oh you mean "put it at baking temperature" for "awhile, we don't know"? great

the boys finale is like, a 5/10 episode, which is actually pretty good on the curve of series finales, but i can understand if people compare it unfavorably to the better episodes of the show. also the fact that it's got this weird, small-cast, covid-restriction feel to half the scenes

watching wemby play makes me think of when you'd quietly throw in a cheat code in a round of nba jam and the neighbor kid you were playing against would get so mad he wouldn't come over for a week after

we should all spread out as far as possible from each other and denounce our bonds

i hope they pull the plug so noel can live his dream forever :)

that reuters article is just bait to get you to say some people shouldn't have the right to vote anymore, and i disagree i just think some people shouldn't have the right to be interviewed by the press anymore

awards are largely fake and dumb but it's very cool that one of my favorite webcomics (keeping time) and easily the best graphic novel i read last year (hello sunshine) both got eisner nominations today. they should both win in order to challenge my assumptions about awards, and bc they're great

got to the point in my parks and rec rewatch where justin theroux shows up. it's been so long since i've seen this, and i'm so used to him in more recent things, that his Original Hairline looks like the fake one.

someone is indescribably upset that there are dozens of birds on the lawn and in the trees out front, and he's stuck in here

i'm very disappointed that my dentist today was like "no here's a temporary crown, instead of a temporary filling, the permanent crown is two more weeks out" HOWEVER she fucked up by saying offhand "but if you really mess this one up, you could just get away without it until then". ribs time

parks and rec has wrapped around to aging okay in the fullness of time. chris pratt's character starts off incredibly annoying and stupid and you're like...wow, great casting. louis ck's cop is a creep and hey, whaddya know. aziz ansari's character is an annoying creep and

i think if you use netflix to find and listen to podcasts, you should be placed in a conservatorship

I can't stop thinking about this video since I saw it last night

looks like my boss got laid off today so i'm just gonna hold reeeeeal still and hope i can milton my way through this job for another couple years

with every episode i love Widow's Bay more and more. the most this-hole-was-made-for-me show since like, Patriot

i love this polling because it's also a pretty good proxy question for "if he gave the stand down order to secret service, would you be mid-flight before he finished the sentence?"

saturday morning of fixing up some old porch wood with wood epoxy. it looks like The Forbidden Marshmallow Fluff and mixes with Forbidden Nougat and it was all i could do not to eat big fistfuls

I just want one coach to be the hardest atheist imaginable. No gods. No masters. No salvation but existence. It's 3rd and 17 and we need a first down. The universe will never care and no one is here to help you. Now go get 'em, cowboy.

if doing duolingo spanish for 3 years is enough for me to be able to buy a byd in mexico then it will have made it all worthwhile

im not an accelerationist but unfortunately things do be accelerating whether i am or not

they ruined the Pedophile Ball and you're 𝘭𝘢𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨. ur fucking sick

i won't say if i'm pro or anti shoplifting 100% of the time but i DO think any "loss prevention officer" is fair game if you want to square up on them, 100% of the time