Impeachment has never stopped being an option.

Wait. Does this mean I have to watch Kimmel now? This timeline is relentless.

"kristi noem and corey lewandowski, who we can confirm are not only dating but running DHS together" absolutely cursed sentence

Epstein Files

Oh it is.

Does my weighted blanket fix my anxiety? Not even. It can be shockingly effective in aiding my sleep quality.

Setting my clock backwards for Rapture Savings Time

got raptured earlier but asked to be allowed to return when i was informed the first ten seasons of American Dad are not available in heaven

I will never forget, before the doctor confirmed my daughter was autistic she said "what if I told you she's autistic?" "That's why I'm here. I know she's on a different wavelength." "What if I told you she isn't autistic?" "Still fine. But she has her struggles and I want to find tools to help."

Tepid but inclusive. I can live with this Democrat setting.

That other person is Abby Gazebo.

once again, if tylenol caused autism, america would have a better rail system

Just a video of my autistic daughter telling me about the fairy garden she made this weekend.

my mom took tylenol when she was pregnant, which made me super focused on menswear and now i have a million followers on twitter

It's a very good film. It's a very good superhero film. It's a very good Superman film. It's a good film and you should watch it.

No words. It's absolutely a Charlie Kirk reactionary terrorist threat. sgfcitizen.org/government/c...

Springfield's largest and oldest LGBTQIA community organization received threats today for merely existing. Some day I'll find words, but not today.

Here’s last night’s story about Jimmy Kimmel, the FCC, freedom of speech in the U.S., and why certain broadcast groups could learn a thing or two from Love Island. youtu.be/ohPToBog_-g

My son chose the very normal Halloween costume of "the guy from Katamari Damacy" Sure bud. No one will have any questions.

South Korea, Sweden, Denmark, Norway, and Singapore all have some kind of mandatory service. They also have universal healthcare. It would be silly to say "if they can do universal healthcare, then so can America" and when the topic moves to mandatory service go "hold on." I'd pilot this idea.

Harrison Butker, the back-to-the-kitchen, women! Chiefs kicker developing a version of the yips where he keeps missing chipshot kicks far to the right, is one of the funnier developments of this year. Six mandatory workplace DEI workshops will fix this.

Everyone just knows the one quote and never read the Letter from Birmingham. Likely because they lack the content of character.

the funny thing about the constant misappropriation of MLK is that the guy left a massive body of writing specifically aimed at explaining his views of those of the movement he represented to the broad public. it is extremely easy to know what the guy thought on a variety of subjects and yet

One time, the Missouri Ethics Committee investigated me over a $30 donation…

If you see this, post a robot.

Gilly's really let herself go.

Springfield Missouri's omelet is filled with cashew chicken and smothered in brown sauce.

"a lot of people who have a hard time in school turn to Goth" Ma'am.

You're going to see some very bad jobs numbers and economic turmoil.

i don’t think people on bluesky understand the severity of this situation. i woke up to literally hundreds of texts from friends and family thinking about either moving back home to india or applying to other countries for jobs. this includes me.

A college buddy is running for local office in another state. I gave to his campaign. I’m receiving attack mailers meant for voters from his GOP opponent, which means they went through his campaign finance reports and added all his donors to their mailing list. That’s next level angry politics.

Jesus that's unstable stuff. More interested in whipping up outrage at existing opposition donors than meeting new people and convincing them to vote for you.

I just came back from an inclusion summit w/ 80 people from all over the world who were highly educated, multi-lingual, and/or of the C-Suite, I was not treated as less because I will not allow it. If you can't include education level when being inclusive, then you do not understand the assignment.

I will shame the Missouri Governor for everything except for his education level… That is some classist shit I will not participate in.

Kehoe did say that Missouri should follow DC values. Looks all F'ed up so I guess they did.

Disney/ABC have a responsibility to refuse to participate in corruption. Kimmel must be reinstated. If Disney/ABC agree to this extortion then perhaps creatives + workers should consider collective action to push back. Same w/buying park + cruise tickets if they bow. People have power. Ask Target

welcome to The Resistance, *checks notes* *sighs* *weeps gently* ...michael eisner

me, age 15: conservatism seems like a fundamentally evil belief system me, age 21: actually it is more complicated than that, things are very complicated and everyone has their own way of seeing things. i am very smart me, age 3x: no i was right the first time nvm

I have such severe imposter syndrome from the last 72 hours working at a summit with educated, world-traveled, multi-lingual people from all over the world to help set a global strategy for Inclusion & Diversity. And I'm just trying to say "I'm from Missouri" not "Missour-uh"

I know it's been a week, but I stand by my initial reaction.

This is a 9-0 Supreme Court decision from just last year.

I think Obama thinks that if he doesn't always speak, and times his moments well, it will be more impactful when he does say something and people will listen. It is not a sentiment I share.

Shedding all the assets that make a media company have value in order to get a merger acquisition to go through for shareholders is a bad short term strategy and a fatal long term one.

I just wanted healthcare, housing, and happiness, but I was told that would hurt the economy so I can't have it.

RFK Jr is looking at Hans Asperger and the number of children he killed and thinks "those are Bush league numbers."

I just hate that so many people have to die, especially children, for millions of people to recognize the moment.

Oh look Missouri!

Goooood morning, Bluesky! Today's episode is brought to you by ABC. We are pleased to announce Jimmy Kimmel's replacement: a dead canary in a cage!

Wait. Weren't we supposed to learn the cause of autism this month?

Hold the fuck up. He's talking about algorithms punching down on Republicans. Republicans own all 3 branches of government. They're not victims. You can't be the one in power and the victim. Fuck off with this.