Batman & Robert

Last Christmas I gave you my shart Then the very next day You made me turn gay

My sister had my nephew when she was 18. He’s 18 now and for Christmas gave her a “You’re going to be a grandma” cards as a joke. She about killed him

It was the warmest Christmas on record for Albuquerque. We broke both a record high and a record warm low! Our low temperature was only 2º cooler than our normal high temperature for this time of year. #NMwx

The Grinch has been shot and killed after a brief standoff with law enforcement. The officers involved are on paid administrative leave while an investigation is ongoing.

Rip kirklebane you loved to rock 🎸😥

Ossioz Bourne

You must choose poll-maker.com/poll5680899x...

Kills me anytime I see shit like custom neon signs or what have you at weddings that have apostrophe s like “The Lee’s” etc. or posts with “merry Christmas from the smith’s” That’s not how that works

Christmas story fun facts: Jean Shepherd, the narrator and writer, is the dad who tells Ralphie “the line ENDS here” in Higbees Viggo Mortensen broke his toe when he kicked the orc helmet

Will Vinton’s Claymation Christmas (1987) is so good

Krisky Ingle

Read son Twas The Night Before Christmas and got to the part with the reindeer and the book had “Donder” instead of Donner and thought I was losing my mind

Wife, who says we have too many coffee mugs, has gifted me a pack of six coffee mugs. Women, amirite

Christmas Eve Poup!

Jope Eshy

Invasion of The Buddy Snatchers

Can’t believe the Red Sox traded Bullfrog

Happy Festivus

Toning The Tiger

folks can complain about the effectiveness of scheduled orderly mass protest but to think about it another way its the closest thing we have to the opening scene of A Muppet Christmas Carol where all the muppets sing "there goes Mr. Dipshit, there goes Mr. Ass" to Scrooge and it clearly bothered him

There goes Mr. Dipshit down the London streets tonight!

it is time

ISO the original “i’ll be dipped in shit that's a little red truck hauling a christmas tree” video

Winnie The Pooh is on the spectrum, but high functioning

A very happy Honda Days December to Remember Sales Event to us all, everyone

Really makes you think

A Bug’s Wife

In want of Total Tank Santa

The dick suckin factory called, everyone there misses you and hopes you’re doing well

Speaking of smoking meats, family and friends know I like to smoke and grill and always gift me seasonings. I’m particular and have a few that I use and have been given a few stinkers in the past. Ruined some stuff. Go-to now is to cut a rack o ribs into 3rds or 4ths and sample them first.

I am outside in short sleeves preparing to smoke meat on the winter solstice. And it’s not even noon yet

Making a pastiche of all my homages

Brave to kick a field goal down 31

Sure am glad my team has never gotten embarrassed in the first round of the playoffs

Would you like some making fuck, Berserker?

Up on the housetop, clit, clit, clit Down through the chimney with old Saint Clit

Jerry = Mickey Elaine = Minnie George = Donald Kramer = Goofy

Luke Wilson, has gone country!

Pat McAfee has been assassinated

Me walking into the kitchen for breakfast after wife says she’s made sausage balls

Born To Dessicate Humidity Is A Fuck Dry Them All 我是干人I am dry man 我是干人 410, 757, 864, 439 Displaced Droplets of Moisture

Alvining the chipmunks

Twinker Bell

Hands down, best Christmas song

Did I tell yall that I made chocolate fudge using velveeta as an ingredient

Stupid ugly fuckin piece shit