There comes to every homosexual over 30, a piece of Keith Haring wall art. It is the way of things.

Alexa, play the Star Trek: First Contact theme while we all gaze at this.

'Clifford, that is the last time I fall for the old 'far side of the moon' excuse.'

Observing the moon.

Who decides the wake up call music for the Artemis astronauts and how do we get them a copy of Spaceman?

Had a proper shave for the first time since I was 22 and now feel like this:

Martin Green looking at this like 'you get a song contest, you get a song contest, every continent gets a song contest.'

do you think buzz aldrin does a funny bit to the new astronauts, like "hey when you get up there, I left my flag on the last trip and I know I could just buy another but"

The Star Trek timeline has us on Jupiter by now. Get a move on, lads!

love it when the rocket removes its clothes in order to enter space Nude

Moon? What a legend.🤞

Seated for Artemis.

He's inhaled too much in the bastu if he thinks a contest physically hosted in Australia is possible.

The very concept of Eurovision Asia.

Ms Alexa, play Hold Me Closer by Ms Jakobs.

How many times have you seen Loreen, Stevie? Normal amount, dahling.

I thought what happened in Tampere stayed in Tampere.

Eeesh glad there's no reports of injuries but that's some pretty historic architecture already gone/threatened in what is (in my biased opinion) the greatest city in the world.

Is nothing sacred?!

Mentally I'm here:

Goodnight, sweet prince.

Now he's free, Greczula/Sam Ryder collab when?

B̶y̶e̶ hej, Felicia.

Eurovision really has been a lifeline for the European floral industry.

Melfest has saved us all.

Is there anything to be said for sending KAJ again?

'There are no fire alarm tests scheduled today so in the unlikely event of an evacuation...'

Surprising Scandinavian Suspense in Sweden.

It now goes to VAR.

Sluta räkna!

Now do your OTHER song Arvingarna. No, not that one, the OTHER one….#melfest

I've been to Stockholm twice and I have several questions about firefighting arrangements in the city.

We are spoiled for schlager tonight.😍

Marcus and Martinus* Sorry, I was blinded by Swedish public broadcasting lasers.

Did SVT buy those lasers for Marcus and Martin's and now need to get their money's worth?

What question are we resolving with the answer Robin Bengtsson?

There was a weird “ABBA vs Queen” show on channel 5 over Christmas, and I feel like Greczula watched that and said “…yes” #melfest

Greczula? More like Greatzula, am I right, Clifford?

Until last week, I thought a Delulu was a Hong Kongese toy.

Half of me, half of me, wants to vote for Greczula. The other wants to remind me that I'm not in Sweden and can't vote.

Good. You cannot improve on Sir Hiss.

We have reached this point for 2026. (This is the same person and he probably hates me).

Step 1: Use Google Translate to work out this is a feedback survey. Step 2: Use Google Translate to translate 'Komiat woz robbed' into Finnish.

Unusual working from home arrangement but each to their own.

UK stop sending spoken word to Eurovision challenge.

They broke me and I gave up and started saying Steven instead of Stevie.😭

MAKE HER READ OUT THE LYRICS YOU COWARDS

Personally would have stuck with 'it's crazy, it's party.'

I trust this email finds you well?

Tampere weather update: