if your bass vibrates my house when you drive past it’s too much i’m sorry

on the ground. on my knees. begging people to spell my fucking name right

there is a special place in hell for people who cook fish in a tiny office without a real kitchen or any actual air flow

in the year of satan 2025, i’m genuinely wondering if i should start doing a tarot reading for every week both to reacquaint myself with the cards and to like… set a tone

bc i sent these to a friend to talk about tarot meanings being used wrong, here are the 4 most popularly misrepresented or misunderstood cards and their meanings from the phantomwise tarot guidebook

am i tripping or is “fuck ICE” the only political thing chappell roan has said in like the last year despite building her platform on being political

Meanwhile in #Portland

YOLO - you oughta love oatmeal

also taylor swift used generative ai in promos for her shows/album and yes i know this as fact and yes she is a billionaire who fights for her own intellectual property rights and can afford to pay artists :)))))

i did start a substack, i did post an essay, and i WILL use it more so i hope the world is ready. its me and my two friend subscribers against the world

my evil boss is back after 2 weeks without him. please pray for my ability to function and not cry at work.

and if i said i have a substack now to post essays on the things i often get sidetracked about with my friends. what then.

mainly so i can say this when people ask about it

people not posting about tloas bc it’s objectively terrible is watering my crops and clearing my skin

dodie’s gone and done it again!!!!! better than every before, i endeavor to say!

new dodie album AND new the midnight album today i am Fed 🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻

Seven years ago today, Washington Post journalist Jamal Khashoggi was tortured, murdered and then dismembered. And any so-called comedian who can't stand up tonight in Riyadh and do ten minutes on that kind of hijinx and horseplay just isn't worth the Saudi blood money he's being paid.

hey so what the fuck is up at the department of agriculture

begging people to stop being so fucking weird about robert irwin on dwts he is literally only 21 years old

i am so tired of feeling bad at being a person 😫

Inspired by Rázsó András' 'Saint Michael Archangel Defeating Satan' Thank you @BrabblesBan for lending me your port of Woe and helping me edit this piece in time to get it signed at LACC 🙏🏽 #Astarion #BG3

oh, me? had to pay $600 out of pocket bc my sister’s puppy broke my glasses and vision insurance would take too long and then tonight when i was about to do my family’s dishes i had to take the puppy outside and wipe her extremely messy behind. what a nightmare day. sweet dog but her consequences….

for the record i called the peacemaker half-twist to myself like halfway when they first showed his dad 🤓☝🏻

it would appear i’ve misplaced my birth control so that’s not, you know, great

every time i have to fight the phantom in hades 2 i want to break my controller in half

hate it when my emotions have a field day and even i can’t tell what im feeling but i know its not good

i’m at that phase of singlehood again where i crave romance (rn in game form) like a drug

the bay area: where you can message your friends at 3am to double check they also felt the earthquake that just woke you up

So: Fascism is bad The First Amendment is good Genocide is an actual fucking crime And also: It's appalling to be in 2025 where each of these is not, in fact, taken as part of the baseline shared reality anymore

i hate small talk i hate getting into places full of people i don’t know im realizing if i don’t have something to talk to them about

i’m so sad bc like. i both really want to be alone and really don’t want to go back and be alone in my hot airbnb so i have to sort of continue to hang out bc i want to but also don’t??? fucking emotions

but i will say i almost hid and cried but i DIDNT and im proud of myself for that even though i am decidedly not shoving myself into people’s groups the way i could be

hoo boy i am really feeling unbalanced hormones from not taking any of my meds yet today

alright fellas i’m moving slow after a shitty past few days but im hoping to do at least a few things in SF today before I GET TO SEE MY FRIENDDDDDD and celebrate her new marriage!!!! yippee!!!!

trying not to cry at the airport bc i’m gonna miss my FUCKING connection

my flight has been delayed 6 times after my original one was canceled and i had to frantically rebook how’s your day going.

In light of today’s news I’d like to remind you that this is a real newspaper clipping. History repeats itself when we don’t stop it.

free speech but only if it doesnt huwt my feewies 🥺👉🏻👈🏻

Calling peoples' employers in a rage because their tributes to Robert Redford weren't horny enough

post a movie you like with a terrible rotten tomatoes score well ok the public liked it i guess but i was gonna say it’s objectively not a good movie but i think it’s my fave of the 3 and i had a GREAT time watching it

didn’t get to be productive OR fuck around today so that’s a real lose/lose for me

This rock looks like Snoopy!!!!!!

just decided NOT to eavesdrop on a conversation that would piss me tf off and that’s hashtag growth folks

seeing mr beast get punched in the stomach is the happiest i’ve been all week

Here is some non-satire for you: Trans rights forever.

bro is it a characteristic of gen z to be SUPER judgmental bc omg

ok i’m realizing if bob is sam helena has to be emma which i guess also works but it throws the WHOLE THING OFF ok its 2am i cant make proper connections

OH OH OH and. the scroll wheel on my cheap ass shit mouse went out so i had to buy a new mouse. which was bad UNTIL i saw i could get one for $13 that’s literally like. the trans flag. so that was exciting for me. and it’s cheap but extremely cute!!

i’m posting 4 bc i am greedy

watching thunderbolts had me realizing every goddamn movie now is hero vs dark version of themselves and also this was a VERY strange parallel to gen v but i could feel it. bob is sam. yelena is marie. are you noticing a pattern